


Hollstein Sex Compilation

by Bianca_Loveless



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: 30 Day NSFW Challenge, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Biting, Blood Drinking, Broody Carmilla, Choking, F/F, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Foreplay, I'll add more tags as i go, Light Bondage, Morning Sex, NSFW, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Public Sex, Rough Sex, Scissoring, Scratching, Shameless Smut, Strap-Ons, Versatile!Hollstein, boob stuff, there's just lots of different types of sex ok, top!Carmilla, top!Laura
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-04
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-07-29 07:30:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 46,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7675561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bianca_Loveless/pseuds/Bianca_Loveless
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Compilation of NSFW (lengthy) one shots for the 30 Day NSFW OTP Challenge for Hollstein.<br/>Literally just porn with plots and feelings. <br/>Forewarning: Most of the one-shots are fairly lengthy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I'll Burn Your Name Into My Throat, I'll be the Fire That'll Catch You

**Author's Note:**

> SO, my dumb ass has taken up yet another writing project on top of the handful of others I have started and/or taken up.
> 
> This is for Day 1 of the challenge (I know I'm like four days late shh) Cuddles (naked).  
> Hella smut and fluff. You know how it goes.  
> {If you get the title reference, you're awesome}  
> Enjoy
> 
> Edit: I want you guys to just SEE how beautiful Langlois, Oregon's beaches are. Hopefully [this](https://www.flickr.com/photos/blmoregon/15516813779/) will help you imagine the tranquil scene I was attempting to create.

           I have spent lifetimes pursuing techniques, immersing myself in various practices, and acquiring any and all knowledge that would provoke transcendentalism. Ataraxia, equanimity, tranquility of the mind. I’ve basked in the peaceful, shallow waters of Hungary’s Lake Balaton, practiced transcendental meditation in one of the world’s most beautiful temples in Rishikesh, India, and have _literally_ walked on the clouds in Bolivia’s Salar de Uyuni, but there is no practice, no marvelous wonder of this tarnished world that has ever calmed the restless fire that has replaced my soul like the soft pattern of Laura’s breathing.

 

           I was listening intently to every inhale and exhale, aware of every gentle rise and fall of her chest against my own, memorizing the mollifying song that her heartbeat played whenever she and I were wrapped in each other’s embrace.  
We were in Laura’s hometown in Langlois, Oregon, cuddled into one another on her father’s old deck swing slowly swaying back and forth. It was a rainy, breezy, overcast day and we were absorbing the serene environment around us, terrified that we’d never get another restful moment like this again.  
Laura’s backyard overlooked the surprisingly tranquil ocean and the black sand that lie just before it. The waves were genial despite the weather, but the rain made up for the intensity that the waves were lacking.  
After dealing with the overwhelming amount of supernatural chaos that had erupted and continued to ensue once Mother had been...dealt with...Laura was _begging_ for a weekend of peace.

  
  
           It was my idea to fly out to and visit her father, seeing as he was the only shred of normality she had left in her newly acquired life of celestial affairs. She was, of course, keen, but also filled with overwhelming anticipation and worry.  
Her father didn’t know of her attraction to women, and she was apprehensive towards what his reaction would be to not only finding out that she was lesbian, but also towards bringing her _girlfriend_ home to announce said fact.  
Lucky for us Mr. Hollis “had a feeling” she preferred women—something to do with a Sarah-Jane from Krav Maga—and was more than accepting of me and of his daughter’s sexual orientation.  
He had left a little less than twenty minutes ago to return to his office downtown—“there are no ‘rain checks’ in my line of work, apparently” he had joked before leaving—and Laura and I were relishing the alone time we finally had with one another.

           Laura was comfortably lying on top of me, her arms strapped under my arms like the sleeves to a backpack and her cheek pressed to my chest as she watched the rain crash down over the beautiful beach in front of us.  
She had been through a lot these past few months, and I could only imagine what hell was flowing through her stream of consciousness right now. But I wanted her to relax — she deserved a few days to unwind and detox from the horrors and stresses that plagued her mind on a daily basis.  
I ran the tips of my fingers gently up and down her back and kissed the top of her head, my undead heart fluttering as I did so.  
_This_ ... _She_ ...was my only source of felicity — my own personal version of transcendency.

 

           “Carm…” Laura spoke suddenly, her eyes still glued to the beach.  
“Hmm?” I hummed, using the hand that was just tracing her back to massage the back of her neck.  
She curled some of my hair around her finger as she spoke, “I can’t stop thinking—what if things never get better back at Silas? Or—what if things are worse when we get back? What if because I selfishly took a few days to relax, things at the school take a turn for the worse?”  
I looked down at the breathtaking human on my chest and fluidly ran my fingers through her soft hair.  
“If it goes to shit, it goes to shit...and we’ll deal with it when we get back. Cupcake, you can’t make yourself guardian of the institution. You’ve overstressed yourself and you deserve a little R&R from time to time.”  
Laura adjusted herself so she was staring into my dark eyes with her beautiful brown ones, and I couldn’t help the wave of anguish that overcame me reading the amount of regret and worry that was plastered onto her face.

 

           “Carm...I’m the _reason_ for all of this...this...chaos. I’m the one who started searching for Betty, and investigating the missing girls...I’m the reason you took on your Mother...And I’m the reason she’s dead—and the reason why the school is in even more turmoil now than when she was alive. I _owe it_ to the students and faculty of Silas University to be their guardian. I stripped them of the order and peace that they once possessed.”  
I sighed and stroked her cheek with my thumb. “You’re not the cause of the chaos, buttercup. If we’re pointing fingers, _I’m_ the one to blame seeing as _I_ was the one who killed Mother. What you did—searching for those missing girls—was brave and just and you’re _not_ the bad guy here, Laura. You saved those girls, you’re constantly saving the school...and you—my fair, doe-eyed maiden—are the only thing that I have found upon my decades of living on this beautifully disastrous planet...that is actually saving _me_ . You’re doing a lot more good than you’re giving yourself credit for. And we’re here…” I adjusted her so she was straddling my waist with her thighs, “...so that you can de-stress and enjoy this _painfully_ brief weekend of peace. We’re already here, cupcake. You might as well utilize the solitude and the _beautiful_ vampire girlfriend under you.”

 

           Laura sighed and leaned her forehead against mine, her hair enclosing me into her—reminding me that she was the only sight worth seeing; my cynosure.  
I cupped her face in my right hand and caressed her toned arm with my left hand, her skin rising under the coolness of my touch. She mirrored my action and cupped my face in her own hand, but slid her hand to the back of my head to gently massage my scalp.  
Maybe it was too early for us to voice it to one another, but by the way we were looking past each other’s eyes and into each other’s souls—well my lack there-of one—it was evident to me that we were just a couple of fools that had fallen into something deeper than love. A love that millions of writers tried their hands at manifesting; a love that thousands of poets, songwriters, and other fools in love attempted to reiterate.  
She was my one and only—my reason for living while simultaneously being the only reason I’d ever choose to take my own life. She was every last galaxy that hid from the human eye, my night sky plagued with hundreds of thousands of stars. She was my eternity and my nothing, because both lasted forever—just like my love for her.

 

           I filled the space between us and locked our lips, my undead body sparking to life as soon as I did so.  
She kissed me back passionately but desperately, hanging onto my lips like this was the last time she’d ever have them here like this. The steady song that her heartbeat had played was beginning to change in tempo, and her soft breathing became occasional gasps for air as the kiss grew even more desperate.  
I wrapped my arms around her waist to bring her closer into me, but our bodies were already so closely interlocked that it was impossible to bring her any closer.  
But there still felt like a gap was between us, and I could tell she felt that way as well by the way she attempted to force my head closer to hers.  
I licked the bottom of her lip, wordlessly asking permission to ensue the dancing of our tongues against each other’s.  
Access was granted and she moaned breathily into my mouth.  
Her warm breath against my face made me feel...human. I felt alive, like her breaths were my own, like her rapid pulse rate was our shared trait.

 

           “Carm...the...neighbours...they’re known for...being looky...loos.” Laura stammered in between kisses.  
“Let’s give them something to look at then, sweetheart.” I smirked before beginning to kiss down her jaw to her neck.  
Laura giggled and I could feel the vibration against my mouth. I attached my lips to her pulse point and roughly sucked, causing a quiet moan to escape from my ethereal girlfriend’s throat.  
I slid my hands up her waist and into her shirt, firmly gripping the sides of her gorgeously toned stomach.  
Laura adjusted herself so that she was straddling only one of my thighs and began a steady pattern of thrusts against it.  
She searched for my lips hungrily with her own and bit down on my bottom lip, resulting in a soft grunt emerging from the base of my throat.  
“It’s—Carm it’s not enough.” Laura whined, her hips grinding into my thigh with more force than before.  
The deck swing was still slowly rocking us back and forth, creaking and jolting sideways with every one of my love’s thrusts.  
“I need more...please Carm.” her lip was quivering against my own and her eyes were desperately pleading mine.  
She never had to ask me twice.

 

           I grabbed her from her thighs and rose off of the deck swing. Our lips never detached as I began to walk back into her house with her thighs constricted around my waist.  
In a blink of an eye, I ran us up to her bedroom and closed the door before we crashed down onto her full-sized bed.  
Laura giggled at the speed, but her giggle quickly formed itself into a moan once I firmly gripped her breasts from under her shirt.  
Her shirt and bra were quickly discarded and I began to suck rough kisses down her torso. Laura’s moans gradually grew louder and her body arched into the kisses. She struggled to remove my shirt so I helped her and tossed it onto the floor, along with her tight pants and boyshorts underwear. I traced my girlfriend’s abs with my hand as I continued to suck my way down her body. It felt like my hands were molding her, one forming down her stomach and the other tightly gripping her waist. Like she was a beautiful work of art that I was aiding in the formation of.

 

Laura lifted her knees and opened her legs wider once my mouth was just above where I could tell she wanted me the most.  
I could smell her arousal and I was getting drunk off of her enticing aroma. She was my most favourite scent, and my most treasured taste—the anticipation of eating her out again was practically causing me to drool.  
But I wasn’t going to give her what she wanted _that_ easy. I wanted her to remember who the best she’ll ever have is—I wanted her to _crave_ me years from now—whether she be my beautiful, lawfully wedded wife or not.

 

           Right after the idea had formed, I immediately attempted to repress the thought of her loving someone else. The thought of another girl’s hands caressing Laura’s perfectly crafted body, kissing her beautifully designed lips, making her moan _their_ name instead of mine... It was too much. I couldn’t inhibit that...that... _hell_ . And it made me angry... _livid_ even. I was stupid with jealousy over a phantom of an idea. It fueled that irrepressible fire that would be known as my soul if it still belonged to me.  
I wanted to take it out on her, give her the best damn sex she’d ever have. Engrain my hands, fingertips, and tongue _into_ her body; burn my name into her throat so that anyone blessed enough to touch and see her as intimately as I have will _know_ that they will _never_ compare to the ghost-lover of her past. I wanted them to _know_ that Laura Hollis was, and always will be **_mine_ ** .

 

           I sucked down on the inside of her thighs roughly. My own arousal was attempting to deploy my fangs, but I kept them in long enough to deliver a few bites onto her thighs that I would then assuage with my tongue.  
Laura’s hips were writhing and her moans were little yelps. She snaked her hands into my hair and gripped it tightly, her grip constricting every time I bit down.  
“F-fuck...Carm...what are you…” she began to speak, but I cut her off by attaching my lips to her center.  
Her body was shaking and her grip on my hair was tightening.  
I squeezed the hell out of her waist as I flattened my tongue through her folds and one of the hands that was choking my scalp quickly began to grip at one of her breasts.  
“CarmIneedmore...fuckgivememore.” She was speaking so quickly that I almost didn’t understand her.  
I harshly sucked on her clit and looked up at her as I did so. Her eyes had rolled into the back of her head, a few of her hairs were sticking to her forehead from the sweat that had formed, and her face was turning red.  
If there was anything I loved more than Laura, it was reducing her to a writhing, moaning, gorgeous mess.

 

           Laura was getting close, i could tell from the way she flexed her abs. But like I said, I wasn’t going to let her have what she wanted _that_ easily.  
I unhinged myself from around her centre and began to trail kisses up her torso. My fangs had protruded, so I kept my bites to a small nip.  
“Wha—what are you...no! Carm!” Laura opened her eyes and looked down at me in shock and anger.  
“Oh, I’m sorry...did you want to cum?” I teased, my voice going down an octave.  
“Carm!” She whined, attempting to push my head back down to finish her off.  
Of course me having supernatural strength and all, I didn’t budge but instead sucked my way back up to her lips, letting her taste herself on mine.  
She kissed me back angrily, biting down on my lip and tugging roughly at my hair.  
I growled into her mouth and she smirked against my lips, satisfied with the noise I had just made.

 

           The anticipation was getting to Laura, so she began to slide a hand down to get herself off.  
Before she could make contact, I grabbed both of her hands and brought them up above her head, pinning them to the pillow with one of my hands.  
“Carmilla, I swear to _God_ !” Laura angrily whined.  
I smirked at her, hiding my teeth, and pressed soft kisses to her pulse point.  
“I want to hear you _beg_ creampuff.”  
I began to suck back down her body, lapsing my tongue across her right nipple.  
In one last desperate attempt for relief, Laura began to grind herself against my right thigh, her level of arousal prevalent from just how wet she was.  
“Wow, you must _really_ not want to cum.” I let out a throaty laugh before sadistically holding her thrashing hips down.  
Laura was whining and glaring at me with severe desperation in those beautiful brown eyes.  
“Carmilla please—fuck, let me cum please I want to cum for you please baby just please fuck me!” Laura was begging from the literal core of her soul.

 

           I grinned and pressed my lips to hers, kissing her slowly and passionately, much like I had kissed her outside.  
I hated when those eyes were strained and under the weight of the millions of problems she had subjected herself to absorb. I hated seeing those eyes puffy from crying, especially after she had thought that I had gotten myself killed while fighting Mother. I wanted nothing more in this world to care for those eyes, keep them bright, and full of a life. I may have been dead inside, but I wanted to make those eyes feel alive...safe...happy. But there was just something about the way those entrancing brown eyes _begged me_ that was enough to suffocate me with an overwhelming sense of desire and love…

  
  
           Without any warning, I swiped my thumb through her folds repeatedly. Her body jerked and she bit down at my lip.  
“Carm...Carmilla.” she moaned my name softly inside of my mouth.  
I broke the kiss and made my way back down to her throbbing centre, “I want your neighbours to know my name, creampuff.”  
I attached myself back to her clit and easily slipped a finger inside. Her body began to shake violently  
“Ooh...my—CARMILLA!” She screamed, her head falling back onto the pillow above her head.  
I continued to pump my finger in her before unexpectedly sliding another one inside and giving her clit another rough kiss.  
“AH—I’m..gunna...Carm I’m gunna…” Laura’s walls were beginning to enclose around my fingers, but I slid one last one inside and continued my fast pumping pace.  
Laura was _shrieking_ at this point. I was almost certain her neighbours would call the cops thinking that I was in here murdering her.  
Which, they wouldn’t necessarily be wrong about. I was just doing it from the inside rather than the outside.

 

           “Show me, love. Show me what you’re gunna do.” I coaxed before curling my fingers inside of her.  
That was all it took.  
Laura let out a loud shriek before loudly crying, “Ca-ARMILLA!”  
She twisted herself into her white pillow, biting down into it and tightly gripped her comforter. Laura came...hard. I had gotten a lot of her in my mouth since I was still attached to her clit, but that didn’t stop her from coming _everywhere_ . There was absolutely _no way_ her father wouldn’t know just what we had been up to if we didn’t throw her bedspread into the washing machine right after this.  
I continued to pump into her, slowly removing my fingers so she could continue riding out her orgasm. Her body was still violently shaking and her eyes were still glued to the back of her head. Her body had lifted itself from off of the bed and was emptying itself out into my mouth, dripping down my chin.  
She was letting out hitched, high pitched, moans until her orgasm had completely subsided.

 

           I removed my fingers and unclipped myself from her clit, licking at it once more before licking the rest of my girlfriend’s cum off of lips.  
She was completely limp against the bed, her breathing slowly returning back to normal.  
I lied down next to her and took her into my arms. She weakly cuddled into me, burying her face into my neck.  
“Mmm...fucking hell, Carm.” Laura drowsily hummed.  
I wrapped my arms around her and got under the covers with her, adjusting her so she was now resting on top of me.  
Her warm, bare body pressed against my cool one placed me into a heavenly trance. Her body felt like the Vegas sun radiating a beautiful amount of heat into me. It's like she was teaching my body how to be alive again. It was a blissful feeling...i felt...home. Wherever we were, as long as Laura's body was against mine, I would always feel like I belonged somewhere.  
I would always be home.  
“I-I can’t feel my...lower half.” Laura softly chuckled as she planted a feeble kiss onto my neck.  
I chuckled as well and began to lull her to sleep with a deluge of soft kisses on her forehead, her scalp, her cheeks, her eyelids, and one long one on her lips.  
She buried her face in my neck and began to slowly fade off into unconsciousness.

 

           “I—love you.” Laura whispered ever so quietly before she was overtaken by sleep.  
My entire body reacted to her words. I was almost certain that my heart was beating, mimicking the same song that Laura’s was performing.  
“I love you Laura.” Just saying the words sent a wave of electricity down my spine.  
“My God...I love you so much.”

 

           After years of traveling, researching, and practicing various methods of meditation, I have _finally_ achieved that inner peace I spent my entire second life looking for. I finally had the tranquility I had been searching for for so goddamn long.  
Laura Hollis was the love of my life, my reason for existing… my ataraxia, my equanimity, my saviour.

  
My soul.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as you may or may not know, my computer crashed & geek squad had to roll through with that factory reset. Meaning ALL the fanfic I was writing--Carmilla Uber AU, Carmilla Unconventional Soulmate AU, Things Left Unsaid, I'm Left Undone, and a whole group of fics I started based on prompts from some of you guys is GONE.  
> ZILCH.  
> DEAD. Like my will to live.  
> Once I get my computer, my inspiration, and my will to live back, I will continue with the other fics. But for now, I'll write smutty gay shit. Bear with me.  
> Anyway, hope you all enjoyed this!


	2. The World is Our Solarium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2 of the NSFW challenge = Kissing (naked). Laura and Carmilla have some fun in the solarium.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not one of my best I'm aware but I'm super behind on the challenge and I put all of my effort into another story that was SUPPOSED to be this one but it went a very different direction than I wanted it to so I just wrote this one up real quick. It's v short.
> 
> Like I've said in the past, I'm usually a 1st person POV writer so if there are any "me"'s or "I"'s [there shouldn't be I went over it a few times but just in case] let me know please!
> 
> Anyway, enjoy!
> 
> Edit: I forgot to mention that I used Elise's tweet (the one in response to the picture of her and Natasha like hugging on that chair) in a very sexual way & I'm not sorry about it.

           (10:32pm) Where r u ?

 

Laura was just returning from a townhall meeting orchestrated by the one and only diabolical vampress, Matska Belmonde. She felt there needed to be some type of public castigation for the students that were throwing firecrackers at the Anglerfish demigod trapped in the crater. Needless to say, no student attending Silas University will ever detonate any type of recreational bombs on or around the Anglerfish ever again…  
LaF and Perry decided that they should probably check up on the old dorm hall seeing as Perry _was_ still the floor don, so Laura figured she wouldn’t be seeing them anytime soon.  
Which wasn’t much of a bother seeing as all she wanted to do was wrap herself into her loving girlfriend’s protective arms for the rest of the night.

 

           (10:33pm) Solarium. Come. Bring a blanket.

 

“A blanket?” Laura wondered out loud, “She’s a vampire she doesn’t get cold...Why does she need a blanket?”  
She slid her phone into her back pocket before shrugging, “Well alright, blanket it is.”  
With that, she began to make her way up the stairs and into the bedroom that the two lovers shared.  
Once inside, she slid out of her dress and into a comfortable fitting tank top and a pair of loose cotton shorts. The extent of her exhaustion didn’t hit her until she had stripped the bed of it’s comforter and wrapped herself in it like a burrito of enervation. She was so tired that she felt her heavy eyelids shut a few times as she made her way up the stairs and into the solarium.

Laura opened the door, the end of the blanket draping behind her like a cape, and was welcomed into the dark room by the silhouette of her beautiful vampire girlfriend reclining back on the hammock that was directly under the barrage of windows. Although the room was dark, there were about a dozen little flickers of light from candles she assumed Carm had lit all around the room.  
The young girl lifted the ends of the blanket—fire hazard—and made her way over to her girlfriend. She seemed to be reading, enjoying the seclusion the room offered and the dim moonlight that was overhead.

 

           “Hey,” Laura yawned as she stepped over a candle.  
Before Carmilla could respond, Laura shrieked.  
Carmilla was sprawled out on the hammock completely naked. The young girl’s eyelids that were heavy a mere two seconds ago had been pried open from the degree of her shock.  
“Oh my God, Carmilla! What are you doing!? What if someone else would have walked in one you in here?! We’re not the only two that live in this home, you know! Where are your clothes?” Laura was shielding her eyes with the blanket that was around her, forcing herself not to admire the enchanting, perfectly toned, pale body that was stretched out in front of her.  
The vampire chuckled before responding, “Relax, creampuff. The league of dimwits haven’t discovered this room yet. I come up here to read and moon-bathe from time to time.”  
Laura peeked at her girlfriend from under her blanket. She was still focused on her book.  
“You totally should have warned me that you were going to be... _in the nude_.” the younger girl jested as she began to hop onto the hammock.  
“Nuh uh, creampuff. This hammock is a clothes free zone. You want to come up here, you have to strip.” Carmilla smirked, her eyes glued to the book,  
Laura giggled, “Seriously?”  
Carmilla remained focused on her book as if she didn’t even hear her.

 

           Laura rolled her eyes and unwrapped herself from the blanket before tossing it on top of Carmilla.  
“You know you could have warned a gal that the invitation to the solarium came with... _conditions_.” Laura teased as she began to strip out of her top.  
Once she got the tank top over her head, she caught the vampire’s eyes slowly examining her body. She smirked and turned her back to her.  
“It’s much more...satisfying...to watch you strip for me.” The vampire sat the book to the side.  
“Hey, I’m not stripping for _you_ , I’m stripping for a spot on the hammock.” Laura explained playfully as she stepped out of her shorts.  
“Mmm… I beg to differ, sweetheart. Come here.” her voice was low and seductive. It sent a chill down Laura’s back.

 

           The vampire stretched the blanket out but kept it pushed to the side so that Laura could slide underneath it.  
Laura turned back around and the vampire gently helped her onto the hammock. She straddled her cold hips and remained sitting up so that she could put the blanket around their legs. All the while her girlfriend was watching her lovingly...as if she were shouting “that’s my Laura” with her eyes.  
She eventually rested her warm chest against the vampire’s cold one and pressed her face into her neck, absorbing the sweet scent that was constantly radiating off of Carmilla’s skin.  
She began to feel those cool fingertips gently graze her bare back while the other arm reached for the book.

 

           “Whatcha reading?” Laura chimed, adjusting herself so she could somewhat see the book that was hovering above her.  
“Candide.” Carmilla responded as she tucked the smaller girl further into her arm.  
“I thought you hated Voltaire.”  
Carmilla scoffed, “Oh trust me, I do.”  
“Then why are you reading one of his most famous works?” Laura questioned as she traced circles under the older girl’s collarbone.  
Carmilla set the book down again and gazed up at the daunting moon as she mused, “Candide is an idiot. One of literature’s most imbecilic characters in my opinion. But all of his adventures, all of his actions, his plights... he does them all for love. For the woman he _claims_ to be unconditionally enamored with. His entire life is centered on that one, fair maiden.” Carmilla locked eyes with her human before concluding, “Cunegonde was his only purpose in life. And when he eventually got her back for good, he realized that the girl who was once the fairest in the land had grown terribly ugly. He even recoiled into himself once he had seen just how ugly she had gotten. His "love" was never real for he was only in love with her beauty. But since he had already spent his entire life pursuing her, he had no choice left but to marry her. To marry the woman of his dreams who he longer actually loved. It’s all shades of fucked up, but it's a great reminder that beauty lasts a season. And it’s what’s on the inside that should draw one to love another...Like what draws me to you.”

Laura almost didn’t hear anything she had said; she had gotten so lost in her lover's mystic eyes. The room around her had disintegrated and she was no longer on the campus of Silas University. She was floating in the midst of the dark clouds that were roaring overhead.

 

           Right now, Laura believed there to be no beginning and no end.  
There was only now.  
_Now_ was the only thing that mattered.  
_Now_ was the only time that they had.  
Now, curled into Carmilla, their eyes voicing all of the promises that their mouths were to afraid to express...things like “I am forever yours”, “We will always be together”, “I will never leave”, and “I love you. I'll always love you”.  
Head in the clouds, bodies interwoven, hearts entwined—this was the heaven that thousands had to pray to get into. _This_ was heaven.  
A heaven she didn’t have to die for, but a heaven she most certainly would die for if the occasion presented itself.  
Carmilla was her solace...and she wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

 

           The smaller girl closed the space that was between them and engaged them in a slow, passionate kiss.  
Laura pressed her hand into the back of the vampire’s head, hoping that a piece of her own soul would intertwine itself into the soul that Laura knew Carmilla had...even if she herself didn’t believe so.  
The vampire was (surprisingly) breathing just as heavily as she was, her warm breath gently slapping against Laura’s lips.  
Every one of her breaths was shaky, desperate—like she physically _needed_ Laura’s lips against hers in order to stay alive.  
Their tongues met, lapping into one another’s mouths comfortably, like they had always belonged there.

 

           Suddenly Laura was being flipped so she was under Carmilla and the covers were being kicked off of their bodies.  
Their lips were still interlocked as Carmilla’s hand began to roam her lover’s body, running over every warm inch of skin. She touched all parts of her as if to memorize every curve and bend, every reaction her body gave to being touched in certain areas. Her cold grasps were soothing yet chilling, and Laura's body seemed to be forming into her lover's hands.  
Carmilla broke the kiss and began to gently suck down her cheek and jaw until she got to her neck.  
The gentle nature of Carmilla's hands and lips reduced Laura to a mandible mess of clay...and Carmilla knew _just_ how to touch her, shape her, and mold her into the beautiful piece of art that she was.

 

           Carmilla gently massaged her way down her girlfriend’s abs and cupped her inner thigh.  
Laura brought her face into her hands and bit down on her own smiling lip.  
“Good thing you’re not Candide and I’m not Cunegonde, huh?” the bubble of energy breathily joked, her eyes drowning in a fair combination of love and lust.  
Carmilla chuckled and bit her own lip as well before attacking Laura with another slow kiss.  
Laura slid a hand down Carmilla’s body and gave her girlfriend’s breast a tight squeeze. Her breath hitched against her mouth and Laura twirled her fingers into her black hair.  
Without any warning, Carmilla began to circle Laura’s clit with her thumb.  
“OoH dear God!” Laura broke the kiss and exclaimed, her hips jerking.  
It was proving to be extremely difficult to keep herself up with her elbow on the hammock, so Carmilla worked her way down to Laura’s legs, her thumb never ceasing it’s movement.

 

           “I like the story we’re writing a lot better, anyway.” Carmilla smirked suddenly as she slowly slid a finger into her shaking girlfriend.  
Laura exhaled loudly.  
When she made her way to the solarium wrapped comfortably in her blanket, this was _not_ how she expected the night was going to go.  
But she wasn’t complaining.

 

           Carmilla sent wet kisses down her waist until she got back down to her girlfriend's throbbing centre. She then lolled painfully slow circles around her clit that sent a cycle of jerks throughout Laura’s body.  
She was moaning uncontrollably and twisting herself into the hammock.  
“H-harder…” Laura croaked, tightly gripping the edges of the hammock.  
Carm smiled against her but obeyed and thrusted her finger into her a bit harder.  
The action resulted in Laura’s torso levitating off of the hammock and a series of shrill-like moans followed.

 

           “Carm!” Laura shouted once she slid another finger into her soaking wet lover.  
She was enjoying the fact that the goddess attached to her didn’t _actually_ have to breathe, because she was licking at a faster rate and Laura didn’t know if she could afford her girlfriend pulling away.  
The lighter-haired girl snaked her hand into Carmilla’s hair and forced her head closer into her to make sure that she wouldn't try to torture her by detaching herself.  
The pleasure was stretching out to every corner of her body, from the top of her head to the tips of her toes (which she had to keep curled in order to somewhat control her very reactive nerves).  
Laura could feel herself just about ready to go over the edge.  
“F-u-uck.” she cried out, her eyes rolling into the back of her head.  
Carmilla began to pump into her a little faster while still keeping her force equally as powerful as her girlfriend had requested. This resulted in Laura’s body thrashing uncontrollably.  
The vampire was able to keep up with her movements, however; never once slowing down.

 

           Laura was beginning to tighten, she could sense that she was coming close.  
“OhmydearsweetLord—Carmilla I’m gunna…”  
Before she could finish, the vampire curled her fingers in her and gave her clit one last hard suck.  
Laura’s entire body began to violently shake and she arched up into her girlfriend.

 

           Laura’s moans were more screams than anything as she went over the edge.  
“That’s it, baby. Let me take care of you.” Carmilla coaxed, continuing her quick pumping pace.  
Laura came all over her girlfriend's hand and lap, but Carmilla didn’t mind.  
If anything, she loved it when she was able to make her girlfriend cum like this.  
Laura’s moans continued as she rode out her orgasm on her vampire’s fingers, trying to twist her hips away from her fingers.  
She was too sensitive for the consistent stimulating thrust of her girlfriend’s fingers in her.  
“S-s-top...I don’t think I can-come like that—again.” Laura sighed, trying to catch her breath.  
Carmilla pulled her fingers out of her girlfriend but continued to rub her clit as she brought her face back up to Laura’s.  
“Want to test that?” She grinned maliciously as she put her tongue in her girlfriend’s mouth.

 

           The pleasure she was feeling from her girlfriend slowly rubbing her, on top of tasting herself on Carmilla’s mouth was enough to put her back into that love drunk high she was in earlier.  
Laura’s mouth was gaping and her sharp moans returned.  
Carmilla began to roughly suck on her neck and Laura wrapped her arms around her love's neck and her legs around her waist, pulling her closer into her.  
She took advantage of their position and shoved another finger back into her.  
“Fuck...you..!” Laura growled into her ear.  
Carmilla laughed, “Maybe after I’m done doing you, creampuff.”  
The younger girl went over the edge a lot quicker this time and dug her nails deep into the vampire’s back.  
Carmilla moaned with her girlfriend as she came crashing down yet again.  
She pressed gentle kisses on her cheeks and slowed her pace so that the creampuff could ride out the rest of her orgasm.  
Laura’s hips shook one last time and Carmilla removed her fingers from inside of her girlfriend and began to lick them slowly.

 

           Laura reached a weak arm up to her girlfriend in a wordless attempt to bring her back down to her.  
Carmilla obeyed and rested comfortably onto the hammock, wrapping her arms protectively around the lovely girl.  
Laura looked up at Carmilla and she returned the gaze.  
“Hi.” she weakly smiled.  
Carmilla laughed, “Hey there, buttercup.”  
Laura pressed a quick peck to Carmilla’s cheek and proceeded to bury herself in the crook of her neck.

 

           Once her breathing had calmed down enough, Laura drowsily smiled, “Invite me up to the solarium more often.”  
The vampire peppered kisses on top of her human’s forehead and smirked, “The world is our solarium, love.”  
Laura gently kissed her neck before giggling, “Of course it is, my broody, sappy vampire.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't know how to end it lol. 
> 
> <3


	3. Can't Keep My Hands to Myself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura realizes they're at a fancy dinner conference on Carmilla's behalf and that it would be /completely/ inappropriate...but she's bored and Carmilla just looks /so/ good in those dress and heels...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 6 of NSFW OTP Challenge = Clothed getting off  
> Top!Laura. You've been warned.

**“CARM!”**

 

The younger girl’s moan rang in the couple’s ears, despite the fact that her hand was clasped over her mouth to muffle the sound.  
Carmilla swiped her tongue across her partner’s folds one last time before unhinging herself, but she kept a finger slowly thrusting into her so that she could see through the rest of her leg-shaking orgasm.  
Laura was breathing heavily, the hand that wasn’t clasped over her mouth tightly choking the rail in the bathroom stall designated for handicapped individuals.  
She had relied on the rail and on Carmilla’s shoulder to keep her from crashing down on top of her girlfriend, although she initially believed Carm resting her leg over her shoulders wouldn’t be much help at all.  
Once her orgasm had subsided and her breathing had returned to normal, Carmilla rose off of the floor and smugly licked her girlfriend off of her fingers.

“So inconsiderate, cupcake. You _do_ realize we’re still in public, right?” She teased matter-of-factly as she began to help redress her girlfriend by pulling her _ruined_ underwear and tight jeans back to their original position.  
“You’re an ass.” Laura growled while buttoning her pants back up.  
Carmilla smirked, “I think the words you’re looking for are, ‘thank you for that _amazing_ orgasm, Carmilla.’”  
Laura wiped the sweat off of her forehead and settled for putting her hair up in a bun since she figured the disheveled mess that her hair had been reduced to would give away what they had abandoned their friends at the concert to do.

“Thanks for making me miss the only band I came here to see tonight.” she rolled her eyes as she proceeded to exit the stall.  
Carmilla wrapped her arms around her waist and placed her head in the crook of her neck as she drawled, “It’s not like you were missing much, their music is _very_ mediocre.”

Laura waddled them over to the sink so she could wash the sweat off of her face and Carmilla unwrapped herself from around her so that she could wash her hands.  
“They’re _not_ mediocre! PVRIS is a really amazing female fronted band with a queer lead singer! Lynn Gunn’s voice is just so raw and powerful and their lyrics are just so deep and inspiring.” Laura passionately retorted before splashing the cool sink water across her face, making a mess as she did so.  
Carmilla stalked past her to the paper-towel dispenser as she listlessly responded, “Well they sound pretty mediocre and rather whiny to me, cupcake.”  
She dried her hands before getting another paper towel and handing it to Laura.

“You just have the music taste of a three-hundred year old woman.” Laura joked as she began to dry her face  
“Mmm, but I have the sex drive of a twelve year old boy, it seems.” She took her girlfriend back in her arms and hovered her mouth over hers. “Because I could _really_ go for a second round. Maybe make some music of our own.”

Laura giggled and eyed her girlfriend’s lips. “You...are...un…believeable” she said slowly as they began to lean into one another.  
Suddenly the flushing of a toilet broke the lover’s out of their trance. A young girl probably around the age of fourteen or fifteen walked over to the sink, trying her best not to eye the two.  
Laura’s face grew red at the thought that a fourteen year old girl more than likely heard them having sex.  
She took a step away from Carmilla as the girl finessed her way around them to get a paper towel, her discomfort making itself pretty prevalent.

Once the girl left the bathroom, Laura covered her face and groaned. “We probably just ruined that poor girl’s night with our totally _not PG-13_ sex noises.”  
Carmilla walked back into her girlfriend as she smirked, “ _We_ ? I wasn’t the one moaning and swearing like the little sailor you are, buttercup.”  
“You suck!” the younger girl jested as she gently pushed off of her girlfriend and began to make her way out of the restroom.  
“Well I _am_ a vampire, that’s kinda my thing, cutie.” Carmilla teased as she allowed her girlfriend to drag her out of the bathroom and back into the main room of the venue.

 

* * *

 

The days that followed the concert went pretty much the same way.  
The gang went to see a movie the next day, but neither Laura nor Carmilla could tell anyone what it was about seeing as Carmilla spent the entire hour and forty-five minutes of it pleasuring her girlfriend. Laura spent the time trying (and for the most part, succeeding) to keep herself quiet while simultaneously attempting to hide what it was that they were doing.

  
The day after, the six went to the mall to do some shopping (It was LaF’s idea seeing as half of everything they owned had recently been either burnt, torn, or ended up the unfortunate victim of a chemical lab spill).  
Laura had made the mistake of suggesting that they check out the sale at Victoria’s Secret (which, in her defense, was the bless-ed 7 for $27, so it was _totally_ worth checking out) and...well...needless to say a _very_ red Laura ended up having to buy a pair of underwear Carmilla had managed to make her ruin.

Luckily, the couple had to attend a fancy dinner conference for what the school called “the Philosophy prodigies” on Carmilla’s behalf, so Laura got a break from her sex hungry vampire.  
It wasn’t even that she was opposed to the sex—as a matter of fact she _adored_ the sex...craved it even. It was just that Carmilla always seemed to catch her off guard with it on days where she was expecting to just enjoy an outing with friends or invest herself in whatever activities she had planned for the day. She hated how smug her girlfriend was knowing that she could reduce her to a whimpering, shaking mess whenever she wanted to. She wanted to get her back so that she could wipe that stupid pompous smug off of her face.  
And she knew _just_ the way to do it.

“Can you tie me up, sweetheart?”  
Carmilla’s high heels clacked against the wooden floorboards of the dorm room until she stopped directly behind Laura.  
“Uh...huh?” Laura’s cheeks got hot from the scene Carmilla’s words had made her imagine.  
She was sitting at her desk putting makeup on— _praying_ she didn’t get any foundation on her tight red dress—but she could see her paler than usual girlfriend in the little mirror.  
Carmilla was _stunning_ . She was wearing a tight black dress that hugged her body in _all_ the right places with heels equally as dark to match. She had a diamond necklace that Laura didn’t even know she owned dangling in between her perked up breasts and a long but thin black wallet with a silver latch tucked under her arm. To top it all off, she had winged her eyeliner, beat her face, and applied this dark red lipstick that Laura decided she _needed_ to have leaving a trail down her stomach.  
Sometimes Laura forgot that her girlfriend grew up in royalty and probably had extensive practice in dressing to impress.  
  
“Not in that way, _Mr. Grey_ . Although... I’m not too opposed to the idea of _you_ bound to the head of the bed while I’m knuckles deep in you...” Carmilla smirked seductively as she inched her way to her girlfriend, her hips swaying so sensually that Laura didn’t know if she’d be able to stop herself from surprise fucking her girlfriend right then and there.

Laura’s face was equally as red as her dress as she gawked, “WOW...Carm you look...amazing…” She tried her best to ignore Carmilla’s words so that she wouldn’t imagine them.  
“You don’t look too bad yourself, cutie. Now here,” she turned slowly, presenting her bare back, “help me out.”

Laura slid her hands on either side of her girlfriend’s waist before grabbing the two strips of cloth that was at her stomach and wrapping it to the small of her back, making it into a cute little bow.  
“So a philosophy prodigy, huh? That’s pretty impressive.” she kept her hands at her waist as she spoke.  
Carmilla turned in her girlfriend’s grasp and pushed a strand of her light brown hair out of her face before smirking in a deep voice, “Well when you’ve been around the block as many times as I have sweetheart, you pick up a thing or two. They have these meetings every October. I’m certain they’re just staking out the poor individual they’d like to use to continue the _prestigious Silas philosophy legacy_. Which is about as much fun as it sounds. They could care less whether we actually plan on pursuing a career in philosophy after college...or even what our own ideologies are. So long as we put on our best faces for the BPA.”

 

“Even if it’s not something you particularly _like_ being apart of, it still _is_ something to be proud of. You’re like...the most philosophical out of all of the philosophy nerds. I’m proud of you.” Laura’s voice was soft and Carmilla slid her hand down to cup her lover’s cheek.  
She bent over so that their faces were directly in front of each other, her eyes gentle and loving against Laura’s.  
“Mmm...Then to hell with what the British Philosophical Association thinks of me. As long as my loving, doe-eyed girlfriend believes me worthy of praise...” Carmilla mocked playfully, gently brushing her smirking lip against Laura’s.  
Laura giggled and added, “Who needs national recognition when you could have recognition from the _uber illustrious_ Laura Hollis.”  
Carmilla chuckled herself before closing the space in between their lips.  
If she was being honest, Laura could have stayed there, lips locked, a hand twirled in Carmilla’s hair and absorbing her enticing, mouth watering scent all night.  
She loved the way Carmilla _always_ leaned into the kiss, like she was somehow trying to bring herself closer into Laura.  
She loved the way her tongue _always_ had to slip it’s way into Laura’s mouth and lap her tongue against hers.  
She loved the way her jaw flexed and her lip quivered whenever she bit the vampire’s bottom lip.

_She just loved Carmilla._

Carmilla slowly pulled away to break the kiss and Laura whined in return.  
“Save that enthusiasm for after the dinner, creampuff.” Carmilla hummed as she turned and made her way back into the restroom, the sound of her high heels echoing in Laura’s soul.  
As bad as Laura felt about wanting to get her girlfriend off while they were at a very fancy, very important dinner conference, she couldn’t find it in herself to _not_ do the thing.  
She was getting antsy just thinking about it.

Laura finished the rest of her makeup and dug through her closet to find her pair of black heels.  
After searching _everywhere_ for her shawl—apparently Carmilla had been using it to shield herself from the sun on the days she slept in until 5 (which was practically every other day)—the two set off.

They were running a bit behind but Carmilla waved it off with a whiny “they wanted me in a dress so they’re going to have to deal with me being fashionably late”.  
Laura knew her well enough to know that Carmilla’s spiel was just apart of her “I’m a punk-rocking, unaffected bad-ass” physique & that she _actually_ secretly enjoyed getting all dolled up. She could tell from the way her eyes had glossed over with a self-assuring confidence.  
Laura let her have it though because she _adored_ how much more confident she seemed strutting across campus in heels.

 

Eventually they found themselves walking hand-in-hand into a very large and tastefully decorated room full of people.

The luminous crystals shimmering from the dozens of chandeliers hanging from the high ceiling lit the room beautifully, adding an air of importance to the room. There were beautiful classical paintings and Victorian styled statues hugging the white walls, solid white pillars holding the building together, and a lavishly decorated stage with colourful lights pointing at it in the far corner of the room.

Most everyone that attended had already taken a seat at their own attractively embellished roundtable. Carmilla dauntlessly strode down one of the aisles, Laura’s hand trapped in her grasp while she shyly lagged behind her. Every head in the room whipped in their direction as they walked by, some gawking and some sharing words of disapproval with their table partners. Laura blushed at all of the extra attention and was especially grateful when they had finally found the table with their nicely printed nameplates in the midst of the crowd.

 

“Miss Karnstein! Welcome!” a heavy, elder man in a pressed brown suit merrily greeted.  
Carmilla pulled out one of the gold coated chairs for Laura to sit on before delicately placing herself into the chair that was right next to her.  
“Good evening Doctor. Warrenton, Professor Shabanova. Please excuse our tardiness, we had a slight... _mishap_...with a missing shawl.” Carmilla smiled politely before looking upon Laura with playful yet gentle eyes.  
Professor Shabanova smiled and waved her hand, “Oh no worries, dear. We've all had our share of things going missing when we need them most!”  
Laura smiled politely, feeling extremely small in the midst of the group of intelligent individuals strewn in front of her.  
“Seems to happen with this one all of the time,” Carmilla ran a hand down Laura’s arm before slipping her fingers in between her girlfriend’s. “Speaking of which, I'd like for you all to meet my _captivating_ girlfriend, Laura Hollis. She's the head reporter _and_ editor for the Silas newspaper and the elected VP of the journalism club. She’s most certainly one of Silas’s most hardworking, intelligent, and incredibly talented minds.” Carmilla fawned more than introduced, all the while eyeing her lovingly.

 

“Ah yes, your name has come up a few times around the office, Miss Hollis. Good things. A few of the professors have been following your online video updates. Your strong conviction and lively nature has attracted the attention of almost half of the department! It's nice to finally meet you.” Professor Shabanova enthusiastically greeted.  
“Oh—well uhm, I'm awfully grateful for the support. Thank you.”  
The compliment caught Laura off guard. She expected all of her viewers were either Silas students or students of neighbouring universities. She never thought actual professors or highly esteemed researchers were tuning in.  
“Oh yes I remember your face now, the girl with the missing roommate.” Dr. Warrenton laughed heartily before stating, “I remember my first year conducting research here at Silas. Finding out that half of the administration and board members were undead creatures of the night wasn't necessarily the easiest truth to swallow.” Professor Shabanova chuckled, “Harold was terrified out of his _mind_. Wouldn't even show up to work.”

 

Laura leaned into the table, “Wait so...the staff...they all _know_ about vampires and their existence?”  
Carmilla played with her girlfriend’s fingers as she explained, “Most do. There's very few that don't know but that changes fairly quickly seeing as it’s practically impossible to walk down the halls without passing some sort of seemingly mystical creature. The other half choose not to believe any of it is real and bask in their own limited perception of the world. The Cave allegory at it’s finest.”

  
“Essentially.” Doctor Warrenton said before taking a sip from his glass of what Laura assumed was champagne. “Not to get off the topic of vampiren and Plato but—”  
“ _Socrates_...if we’re being more than conversational” Carmilla interrupted coolly.  
Laura squeezed her hand and shot her a “not right now” glance.  
He nodded as he wiped his mouth with the cloth that was resting in his lap. “I can see why you chose her, Marleen.”  
Professor Shabanova folded her hands across her knee and nodded her head smugly.  
“Yes my dear, vampiren and _Socrates_ . But there is someone I’d like for you to meet tonight. His name is Theodore Straka. He is the director of the BPA and he will be joining us for dinner after his speech. Mr. Straka has been a _generous_ donor to our Philosophy program and this will be his first time attending one of these dinner conferences. I know I don’t have to remind you to be on your best behaviour Miss Karnstein so I won’t. But make the department proud.”

Carmilla squared her shoulders before grinning, “Of course.”

Soon after that conversation, the gentleman in question, Theodore Straka, and a few other very important sounding individuals began to take the stage. Everyone turned their attention to the brightly lit stage as the three important men and the only woman took turns speaking.  
The director of the BPA had literally only been five minutes into his spiel and Laura was already bored out of her mind.  
She glanced over at her divinely structured girlfriend and could see the lack of interest in her eyes.  
Despite her inner boredom, she was sitting with a quaint poise, one of her legs resting over the other and her hands folded on the table in front of her.  
Although Laura _definitely_ appreciated how sexy Carmilla looked and was acting tonight, she had to say, she loved her lazy, sarcastic, leather wearing self a lot more.  
It was more _her_ and Laura loved when she was herself.  
Whether it’d be one of those cold October evenings with Carm curled into Laura asking to have fingers combed through her hair while she shared stories about her life back at home with her dad, or when she was making rude, snide comments at Danny for...well...existing (although she constantly tells her she needs to be nicer to Danny, Laura knew it wasn’t something that’d happen), or when Carmilla allowed Laura to reduce her to a moaning, writhing mess.  
It was the little things that made her _her_ that Laura loved...and it was _her_ that made Laura feel at home.

  
Laura didn’t realize how long she had been admiring her girlfriend until she caught her eyes.  
They were looking at each other idly before Laura got the inkling to move her chair closer to her already very close vampire.  
“What’s wrong, creampuff? Bored already?” Carmilla cooed in her ear.  
Laura nodded and linked her right arm around Carm’s left one and leaned her head into her neck, deliberately sliding a hand in between her upper thigh.

“I know. Don’t worry, I’m subjecting you to my torture so you can subject me to yours—I’ll watch your Dr. What show with you.” Carmilla pressed her lips to the top of Laura’s head.  
Laura immediately perked up and looked at her before beaming, “Really?!”  
Carmilla smirked and rubbed her hand against the hand Laura had at her thigh, “I know I’ll regret it later. But yes.”  
Inside, Laura was exploding with happiness and energy. She’d been trying to put her girlfriend on to the show for _months_. Now was her chance.  
The small girl was smiling like an idiot. “Okay, I’m holding you to that! And for the record, it’s Dr. _Who_ , not Dr. What.”

Carm rolled her eyes. “Dr. Who, what, where, when, why and how… it makes no difference.”  
Now Laura was the one rolling her eyes but she brought her head back to the vampire’s neck and attempted to continue listening to the director speak.

 

“Thank you President Robert Stern for those encouraging words. Up next we have the BPA director, Theodore Straka.” the woman hosting introduced.  
Laura took note of the hostess's  _strong_ features and like...otherworldly beauty. She’d came to the conclusion that she was probably a vampire.  
The room clapped for him and the two girls did so as well—despite the level of difficulty due to their arms being conjoined.  
“Thank you, thank you. Hello all. It’s nice to be in the presence of our world’s most unprecedented, innovative minds.” Theodore began, a slight accent emitting from the man who Laura assumed was of Chinese descent.  
“You know, when I started college my first year with a degree in philosophy…”  
Everything after the word ‘philosophy’ went right over Laura’s head. He used so many big words and she was so undoubtedly lost.

 

Carmilla was completely invested in his words, as if she were hanging on to every last syllable.  
Probably taking note of what he was saying to use when engaging in conversation with him later.  
Suddenly Doctor Warrenton turned his head back in the girls direction and leaned in to whisper, “He seems very friendly, but he’s also very observant. Make sure to throw in some pointers about his speech. It’ll look better on you.”

Carmilla nodded.  
Laura wasn’t sure if that applied to her as well, but by the time she had tuned back into whatever it was he was saying, the conversation was so out of context that she was even more lost now than she was before.  
However, she _did_ understand when everyone started clapping and when the mic was being returned to the beautiful hostess

 

Carmilla uncrossed her beautiful legs and pulled her chair closer to the table.  
She seemed to be mentally planning the conversation that was to be had with Mr. Straka.  
Laura began to absentmindedly draw circles with her finger on the inside of Carmilla’s thigh as her eyes roamed the room.  
She’d never gone into this building before seeing as the Philosophy building had almost nothing to do with her major, but she was appreciative of the extensive amount of classical decor.  
Laura figured if _she_ were enjoying it so much, Carmilla certainly had to take a liking to it.

 

Without any forewarning, Carmilla’s mouth was inches away from Laura’s ear and she was seductively—well to Laura it was seductive—whispering, “I’d concentrate a little better if you didn’t do that.”  
The little journalist didn’t even realize what it was she was referring to until she remembered her hand was still at Carm’s thigh.  
All of a sudden her previous plan had resurfaced, causing the girl to grin maliciously.  
“Oh, sorry. Would you prefer me to do this instead?”  
She began to grip her way slowly up her thigh, the side of Carmilla’s dress going up with it.  
Carmilla’s eyes were darting around the room and her lips began to twitch.

 Laura took her time roughly squeezing the insides of her thigh, the vampire shuddering every so often in her seat.  
“Laura, I swear to _God_ …” Carmilla griped under her breath.  
Before she could continue with her threat, Laura found her way to the fabric of Carmilla’s thong.  
The philosophy major’s lower body rose at the contact, causing her legs to slam against the bottom of the table.  
Professor Shabanova, Doctor Warrenton and a few of the patrons sitting close enough to hear the bang turned to see what had happened.  
Carmilla cleared her throat before choking out, “Sorry. I had a _really_ bad...chill.”  
Everyone seemed to be okay with that excuse because they reverted their attention back to the woman on stage speaking.

The light haired girl was enjoying herself entirely as she now started to lightly trace the outline of Carmilla’s lips through the fabric.  
“I’m not sure if you noticed, sweetheart, but we’re at a _pretty_ important dinner here.” Carmilla whispered as she placed a hand over her girlfriend’s strong forearm.  
Laura added a bit more pressure to her touch and Carmilla bit her lip in response.  
The creampuff decided she’d show _some_ mercy by softly musing, “If you want me to stop, just say so.”  
A minute of silence between the two ensued as the woman’s speech ended and the mic was once again handed off.  
Laura looked up at her girlfriend and she could see the indecision in her eyes.  
She introduced circle eights to Carmilla’s clit, making sure to put the most pressure around her clit every time she swiped by it.  
Carmilla’s eyes fluttered and her body tensed with every swipe.

“You...are... _evil_ .” Carmilla sighed between gritted teeth.  
“That’s no way to talk to the girl that could make this _all_ go away.” Laura quietly chimed as she began to slowly inch her way out of the inside of her dress.  
Carmilla grabbed her by the forearm and growled, “Don’t you fucking dare.” under her breath.  
Laura smiled, extremely pleased with her reaction, and pressed the centre of her thumb into the cloth that was covering her girlfriend’s centre.  
Carmilla’s breath hitched and she bit down on her tongue before the sound she had sitting in the back of her throat could escape.  
The pale goddess leaned onto the table and placed her head against the two clenched fists she was making.  
Laura began to feel a moist area forming on the fabric and she couldn’t help but smile to herself.  
She was making the centuries old vampire _crave_ her, even in a situation where she knew she shouldn’t.

Suddenly the crowd of people were clapping louder than any of the previous times and the individuals on stage were making their way to the tables.  
“Here he comes. Remember Carmilla, best behaviour.” Professor Shabanova whispered just before the well dressed man from the stage had found his name-tag at their table.  
“Mr. Straka! Wonderful to have you at our event! Your speech was wonderful, very awespiring. Please, have a seat.” Doctor Warrenson greeted rather loudly.  
Mr. Straka smiled and shook hands with both Doctor Warrenson and Professor Shabanova. “Please, no need more formalities. Call me Theo.”  
Theodore took his place across from Carmilla before smiling at all of them.  
“It’s wonderful to be here. As I said on stage, it’s very enlightening to be around so many brilliant minds.” he grinned at Carmilla and Laura before facing the other two.

 

Laura smiled politely at Theodore as she began to grind her finger further into her girlfriend who was now (attempting) to sit up straight and show face.  
She could feel just how much she was getting off to her touches and it made Laura’s polite smile shift to one of complacency.  
“And a pair of brilliant minds sit before you today. Theo, we’d like to introduce you to Silas’s top philosophy student, Carmilla Karnstein and her girlfriend Laura Hollis. They’re both very important, hardworking assets to the university.” Doctor Warrenson introduced, extending his hand out to the two.  
“It’s—very nice to—meet you, Theo. I’ve heard many things—of you and your...successes.” Carmilla had a difficult time expressing, but her eyes remained focused and her face hard as stone.  
“Good things I’d hope,” Theo chuckled, “It’s great to meet you both. I’ve always been interested in this student-to-faculty-to-board interaction and I’m very pleased with everything so far. Silas seems to live up to it’s reputation.”

 

The conversation wasn’t really processing in Laura’s head, she was focusing on rubbing her girlfriend.  
Carmilla’s chest began to hitch as the younger girl began to gently pat her clit with her thumb.  
“Are you alright?” Theo asked suddenly, completely cutting whatever Doctor Warrenson was saying off.  
Laura looked over at her girlfriend and she could see the damage she was doing.  
Carmilla’s pale face had blotches of pink on either one of her cheeks, her breathing pattern was rugged, and she was gripping the rim of her chair so tightly Laura was certain there was more than likely a dent.  
Despite her telling appearance, she nodded "No no, I'm fine..."  
“Are you sure, babe? Do you need something, like some water?” Laura faked concern, her eyes teasing the hell out of her.  
Carmilla shot her a crippling glance for a split second before her eyes turned gentle. “I’m fine, love thanks.”  
Laura could almost hear every filthy, vulgar word Carmilla _really_ wanted to say and it was—strangely—turning her on.  
The group across the table resparked their conversation and Carmilla briefly shut her eyes and took a deep breath.  
Laura saw why Carmilla was always so keen at turning her on at inappropriate times: it was fun!

 

After a few more minutes, Laura maliciously placed her hand back on her lover’s pale inner thigh and left it dormant.  
Carmilla was about to shoot Laura a look, but Theo had redirected his attention back to the two.  
“You two have been awfully quiet. Tell me something about yourselves. Like, Carmilla, you’re the _top_ philosophy student. You must have some fascinating ideologies you’re keeping at bay.” Theo folded his hands on the table in front of him.  
The vampire took a deep breath, possibly to regain her composure before she began to go on a long, passionate rant about some dead languages.  
Laura watched her girlfriend and couldn’t help but fall in love with the way she spoke about things in philosophy that intrigued her.  
In the midst of her tangent, the vampire moved forward in her seat, driving Laura’s hand back to the soaked barrier between Laura’s hand and Carmilla’s centre.  
The young journalist tried her hand at her best pokerface to mask just how pleased she was at Carmilla’s attempt to get her to continue.   
However, Laura decided she’d wait a little longer before continuing the friction and moved her hand back to it’s original position on her thigh.

At this point, Laura was crossing her fingers, hoping no one would attempt to speak to her or ask her questions because she had tuned literally everyone and everything out. Her only focus was her very beautiful and very horny girlfriend.  
After a few more minutes of back and forth dialogue—and a few more _very_ desperate attempts at getting Laura to continue—she moved the fabric of Carmilla’s thong to the side and shoved her middle finger in it’s place.  
“It’s deemed only important by very specialized archaeologists, and completely forgotten by—AH.” Carmilla’s sentence was cut short by a moan and a sharp intake of breath.  
Carmilla was _so_ going to want her comeuppance after tonight.

The whole table reacted to her moan.   
Everyone was glancing at her, unaware if they should be concerned or not.  
“Miss Karnstein are you sure you’re o—”  
“No...No I’m—I’m not okay. I’m sorry but you’ll have to—ex—cuse me. I am—suddenly not feeling well— _at all_ .” she responded breathily as Laura’s finger continued to slowly pump into her.  
Carmilla was covering her face and Laura removed her finger from her and smoothed her dress back down as they both rose from the table.  
“Carm—what’s wrong?” Laura questioned, genuine concern stamped into her tone.  
Carmilla just shook her head from behind her hand and tightly gripped her girlfriend’s hand.  
“We haven’t even had dinner yet, Miss Karnstein!” Professor Shabanova called out as the vampire began to quickly drag her girlfriend out of the conference room.  
Carmilla said nothing more as they continued to walk, her eyes covered and her tight grip on Laura not releasing.  
“Carm slow down...I haven’t had as much practice speed walking in heels as you have.” Laura tried to call from behind her girlfriend.  
She was certain if she fell Carmilla would just drag her the rest of the way to...wherever it was they were going.

They had continued walking once they left the conference room until they had gotten into the elevator they had taken to get there.  
Once the elevator door closed and Laura pressed the ‘1’ button signifying the first floor, Carmilla dropped her hand and opened her eyes.  
Laura was gazing into the two black abysses that had taken the place of Carmilla’s eyes.  
The whites in her eyes were nonexistent and her fangs were protruding.  
It took Laura aback. She had never witnessed her girlfriend like this before.  
The elevator didn’t even get to begin moving before Carmilla grabbed Laura by her shoulders and pinned her to the wall of the elevator, making out with her intensely.  
Her lips were so aggressive against Laura and it turned her on _a lot_ more than she wanted it to.

 

“Fuck—Carm.” Laura moaned into her mouth as Carmilla lifted her by her waist and kept her pinned to the wall with her mouth.  
Her hands were clawing at Carmilla’s breasts and the vampire moaned loudly when she squeezed them.  
Eventually the elevator stopped at the first floor and the kisses and the groping ceased.  
Carmilla went back to shielding her eyes and tightly gripping her girlfriend’s hand as she led them into the main lobby and out of the exit.  
It was pretty late and the building was pretty far out on campus, so there weren’t any students lingering around the area that Laura could see.  
Almost as instantaneous as her thought about the lack of students, Carmilla had Laura pinned against the wall of the building, kissing her just as roughly as before.  
Laura snaked her hands into the vampire’s hair and gave it a quick tug.  
Carmilla moaned loudly again, her black eyes opening and glaring into Laura’s soul.  
“You’re going to finish what you started.” Carmilla more so demanded than asked.  
Laura  definitely wasn’t opposed to the idea.   
She could feel herself getting even more turned on the rougher Carmilla was with her and she just needed to do something about it.  
Laura began to suck down the vampire’s neck, seeing the vampire’s dark red lipstick on the spots that Laura had sucked.  
Carmilla chuckled heartily before whispering, “Not here, cutie.”

Suddenly Laura was being swept off of her feet and before she knew it, she was flying through what seemed like time and space.  
It took her eyes a minute to adjust to the fact that she was now in the dorm room they shared, but Carmilla didn’t allow her the time for she immediately crashed their lips together again.   
They both began to remove each other’s dresses in the process—which took _a lot_ longer than Carmilla wanted it to.   
After they had successfully removed Carmilla’s dress, the vampire couldn’t wait any longer and simply ripped Laura’s dress from the neck down.  
Laura angrily scoffed. “Carm!”  
“I’ll buy you another one, cupcake.” She quickly muttered as she tossed her dress to the floor.  
Their lips met again and Laura wrapped her arms around her girlfriend’s neck.

Carmilla lifted Laura up onto her knees and pulled her closer into her.  
The vampire positioned her thigh in between Laura’s thighs and ground into her.  
Laura’s head snapped back and she let out a shaky moan into Carmilla’s mouth.  
She continued grinding her thigh into Laura’s centre, which transcended Laura into a lusty head high.  
The friction felt _so_ good that Laura thought she’d probably lose herself right then and there.  
As much as she wanted Carmilla to fuck her, she didn’t want to give her girlfriend the satisfaction of cumming before her on the day that Laura was supposed to be the one doing the surprise fucking.  
The light haired girl ground herself against Carmilla’s lap one last time before she put all of her weight against her, causing the couple to fall back to the head of the bed.

“No, I’m doing you tonight.” she responded huskily, grabbing her girlfriend by her wrists and pinning them to the top of her head.  
Carmilla looked upon her with her obsidian eyes flashing and her bottom lip quivering.  
Laura leaned into her girlfriend and kissed her hungrily.   
She began to slide her hands down her arms slowly until they found the swell of the vampire's breasts.  
The kiss was broken yet again and Laura brought her lips to her girlfriends breasts, sucking and biting on one and then doing the same thing to the other.  
Carmilla’s body was arching into hers, her black eyes disappearing behind her eyelids.  
“Fuck.” Carmilla whispered once Laura’s tongue quickly attacked her left nipple.  
The fact that she could get Carmilla—a three hundred year old, extremely sexually experienced vampire—to react the way she was to her touches sent Laura’s ego flying.

Laura began to suck her way down the vampire’s body, noticing the bruises beginning to form as she was going down.  
“At least _hers_ heal quickly.” Laura thought.  
She continued to kiss down Carmilla’s perfectly sculptured pale body until her head was in-between her legs.  
“I’m getting _older_ here, cupcake.” Carmilla impatiently growled.  
Laura stuck her head up and slowly taunted, “Keep complaining and i’ll leave you here to get yourself off.”  
Carmilla shut her mouth instantly.  
Laura smiled at her obedience and placed her head back in between her lover's legs.  
The ball of **sinshine** began to trail wet kisses up to her inner thigh and Carmilla was shivering with anticipation.  
She pecked kisses around her clit until she figured she had made her girlfriend suffer long enough.   
Without any warning to a shivering, quivering Carmilla, Laura flattened and ran her tongue against the vampire’s length.  
Carmilla’s hips jerked up and her breath caught in her throat.

Laura cunningly and hastily traced the vampire's clit, leaving her  _trembling_.  
“Oh God, Laura!” her back lifted slightly off of the bed.  
The lighter haired girl continued to lap her tongue across her clit until she believed she was at a fair enough speed to insert a finger inside.  
Her finger slid into Carmilla with ease and she responded to the action by breathily moaning another, “F-f-fuck!”  
The excessive teasing she had been subjected to probably had Carmilla’s body ready to go over the edge a lot quicker because her hips were writhing more than usual, and her moans were getting closer and closer together.  
Her girlfriend began shouting what Laura assumed were extremely vulgar things in languages unfamiliar to her once she added another finger into her and curled it.  
“Laura, Laura, LAURA!” Carmilla was shrilling.

The vampirical goddess’s walls were beginning to clench around Laura’s fingers, but her hips were trembling away from her.  
“OhmyGod...Baby wait a minute—waitaminutebaby…fuck” Carmilla’s words were sticking together as she tightly grasped the sheets, her upper body perched up in bed but her head lolling backwards.  
Laura could sense that her lover was too sensitive to the abrasive sucks and thrusting pattern due to the fact that she was literally running away from her orgasm.  
“I’ve got you, Carm. It’s okay, I have you.” Laura loving cooed as she peppered kisses on her waist before wrapping her forearm around it to keep her stationary.  
Carmilla’s moans were so loud that she was _100%_ positive everyone in the entire building, let alone the entire  _floor_ could hear her.

Carmilla gathered her love’s hair in her hands and Laura gave her clit one last hard suck before curling her cramping fingers in her.  
Her torso rose off of the bed once more, her entire body—from her head to her toes—was shaking _vigorously,_ and her black eyes had rolled back into her head as she hoarsely croaked her lover’s name, “LAURA!”  
With that, the pale girl came all over Laura’s bedspread and mouth.  
  
If there was anything Laura loved more than the taste of chocolate chip cookies, it was the sweet taste of her girlfriend going over the edge.  
She licked up the rest of her girlfriend’s cum off of her lips before Carmilla had forcefully grasped her head and slipped her tongue into Laura’s mouth.  
Fingers were still being pumped into Carmilla despite the fact that her body was trembling from every movement.  
Laura could feel every one of Carmilla’s emotions from the kiss: fatigue, lust, satisfaction... _love_ .   
She could only hope her lover was feeling the same things.

Once Carm’s orgasm had subsided, Carmilla pushed herself against Laura so that Laura was now under her.  
Carmilla broke the kiss and rested her sweaty forehead against Laura’s, both parties panting as heavily as the other.  
The white in the vampire’s eyes had returned and the lovers were watching each other while simultaneously getting lost in one another’s eyes.  
Laura planted a gentle kiss on Carmilla’s cheek and nuzzled her head into the crook of her neck.  
“Fucking hell, cupcake. You got me good.” Carmilla quietly admitted.  
Laura was grinning from ear to ear at her words. “Who’s the “swearing little sailor” now?”

Carm rolled her eyes. “Don’t think i’ll ever admit this night ever happened.”  
The smug look on her face didn’t subside, if anything, it grew in intensity.  
“That’s fine. Because I could _always_ just catch you by surprise any other day.” Laura chimed playfully.  
The vampire brought their lips together once more and Laura snaked a hand back into her hair.  
The kiss didn’t have any intensity to it.   
The kissed slowly, passionately…like they were opening up the depths of their souls to intertwine with one another.  
Like they were the only one’s in the world and like nothing else mattered or ever would.  
They kissed like they had waited a lifetime to be together.  
They kissed like they _belonged together_. And they did.

 

Laura broke the kiss and rested her forehead against Carm’s, her own hot breath tickling the vampire’s cheeks.  
“So...how do you think “Theodore Straka” is going to like our whole ‘Cinderella, fleeing before dinner’ act?” The little cupcake toothed.  
Carmilla's eyes flickered as she droned, “I went on a five minute rant about how Sumerian wasn’t announced as being _much_ older than Akkadian until 30 some years after it was first discovered to be...and how _that_ could inherently tie to the reason both languages I have come to know and love are now just as dead as I. If he’s not satisfied with my “humans have been dissipating formerly common language from the history books because they’re a bunch of egotistical, creatures of habit” theory then both he and his opinions can go fuck themselves.”  
The ray of sunshine giggled and Carmilla locked their lips again, enjoying the feel of her young lover’s soft lips against her own.  
  
“Hey...Carm...I...I—I...uh…” Laura croaked in between kisses.  
Carmilla pulled away and looked at her tenderly.  
“I love you too, cupcake.” she finished the words for her and Laura could have sworn that in that moment, her heart had exploded in her chest.  
Carmilla loved her too.

Both of their eyes lit up at Carmilla’s words and they laughed into another kiss.  
“I love you too.” Carmilla repeated between kisses, but this time the words settled into Laura’s heart and seeped their way down into her soul.  
She didn’t have to say the words back to her, because she knew Carmilla could feel them against her skin, see them in her eyes, taste them on her tongue.

Laura may have made a joke out of it at first, but if she changed the wording a bit, she knew now that they were words that she actively believed: who needs national recognition when you have a love as powerful as ours?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk what happened with the ending lol
> 
> ****So I decided to just write the one shots based on whatever day I'm in seeing as I started the challenge late and now it's literally taking me forever to catch up. If anything I'll just add the ones I missed at the end once the 30 day challenge is over.  
> Also I know a lot of people don't like the 1st person POV fics, but honestly if you read the first one shot of this series and then read this one, you can see a significant difference: I write /a lot/ better in 1st person POV.  
> I'm not saying /all/ of the one shots will be in 1st person POV but there will be a good mix of both 3rd and 1st person POV. You've been warned.  
> Thanks for reading, thank you the comments, and thank you for the Kudos!  
> [Talk to me about Carmilla Season 3](http://brokebackbianca.tumblr.com/) Or don't.  
> But stay awesome regardless


	4. Body Work

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura tries to get Carmilla to join her in her work out, but the two find other ways to get their cardio...  
> #Versatile!Hollstein & strapon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't sure if I wanted this to be an AU or to go along with the series, so for now I'm going to say this is based being sometime around episode 23-25 of season 1.  
> I'm a few days behind on the challenge so I kind of mashed some of the days together.  
> This is for Days 3, (kind of) 5, and 7 of the NSFW OTP challenge:  
> Day 3 - first time, Day 5 - blow job (you'll understand why it's KIND OF this one) and Day 7 - Dressed/naked (half dressed)
> 
> I got a request to do one for the bj aspect of the nsfw challenge, but I'm really not comfortable with them, especially writing them. So It wasn't all that prevalent in this piece so I apologize in advance.

      “ ** _I swear, gentlemen, that to be too conscious is an illness—a real thorough going illness. For man’s everyday needs, it would have been quite enough to have the ordinary human consciousness, that is, half or a quarter of the—_** ”  
“Huughh!”  
I peered over the top of my worn copy of _Notes from Underground_ _and the Double_ at the source of the noise that had jeered my focus.  
It was my annoying spaz of a roommate. She was in the middle of the room doing an exercise routine while occasionally filling the air with her unnecessary grunts and groans.  
**_Inconsiderate, vexatious child. Can’t she see that I’m trying to read?_** ** _  
_** Laura continued to blast through a set of push-ups, loudly blowing air out of her mouth as she did so. I rolled my eyes and attempted to drown out her noises by re-focusing on Fyodor Dostoyevsky.

 

      “ **_For man’s everyday needs, it would have been quite enough to have the ordinary human consciousness, that is, half or a quarter of the amount which falls to the lot of a cultivated man of our unhappy nineteenth century, especially one who has the fatal—_ ** ”  
“Hold it, Hollis...Hold it!”  
I exhaled loudly before dropping the book onto the empty spot next to me on the bed.  
“ _Must_ you do that in here?” I made sure my tone embodied the full extent of my irritation.  
Laura didn’t look over at me, she just broke out of her plank and began to do squats.  
“Yes Miss _Grumpy_ . The gym is temporarily closed due to flooding of an “unidentified gooey substance” that apparently started growing mushrooms. Since the janitors weren’t equipped with the knowledge on how to clean up said unidentified, possibly toxic, orange, fungi-sprouting goo, they’ve decided to “cease all gym traffic and activities until further notice”.” she explained in between grunts.

      “Great, so due to the fact that their janitorial staff consists of a bunch of pansified, squeamish four year olds, I’m forced to lie here and listen to you grunt all afternoon. Que sera, sera!” I grumbled as I crossed my legs and began to watch her fluid up-and-down movements.  
Although she was _exceedingly_ aggravating—but a joy to annoy—the creampuff _did_ have a very attractive body.  
The way those black under armour volleyball shorts clung to her perfectly toned ass should have been a fucking _sin_ .  
I also had a deep appreciation for the fact that she was working out in a sports bra. It placed me front and centre to the Laura Hollis ab debut and I was loving every second of it.    
Suddenly the idea of her working out in here wasn’t such a bad thing anymore.

      “Well...I'd say the university making their staff & student's health a priority is actually a _good_ thing, Carmilla...and, hey! You _could_ join me. That way I’d have an exercise buddy! And you wouldn’t have to worry about _me_ being the only one grunting because we’d be grunting all afternoon _together_ .” Laura chimed.  
I smirked at her words and was just about to make a _very_ inappropriate comment but she froze and filled the silence faster than I could, “Uhh...that didn’t come out right.”  
I slid my legs over the edge of the bed—still enjoying the _wonderful_ rear view—before seductively voicing, “Well if me grunting is what you’d like to hear, then I have a- _whole_ -nother activity in mind for that.”

      I could hear the little cupcake’s heart rate increasing and I was almost positive it wasn’t from the squats.  
**_Since my plans of reading all evening have been foiled, I guess trying my hand at getting a rise out of Laura will suffice._ ** **_  
_ ** I was fairly certain Laura was aware of my sudden spike in flirtatious gestures and acts of kindness, but what I really wanted to know was if she’d ever reciprocate?

_...not that I wanted her to...or anything…_

      I mean her attraction to me was fairly obvious.  
The way her body temperature and heart rate both skyrocketed whenever I so much as grazed a finger against her...or the way she'd glance at me dressing and undressing when she didn't think I was paying attention, or even the way she bit her bottom lip whenever she was watching me do literally anything…

 _Goddamn_ was I head over heels for this annoying shrill of a girl.

  
      OK it _may_ have been pretty bad...falling for one of the girl's Mother assigned me to prep for the sacrifice...but I had convinced myself that all I needed to do was have sex with her—make the naive, provincial little daddy’s girl cling to the sheets as my name escaped her lips like a song of praise. I was sure that once I could reduce her to a trembling, writhing mess _begging_ me for more, these pockets of air that were constantly combusting themselves within the depths of my stomach whenever I so much as _looked_ at her would disappear.

I _needed_ that to be the case.

      “...orrrr...you could...do this workout with me. Look come here and try it.” the creampuff swallowed before sitting on the floor and adjusting herself so there was a little space next to her.  
My eyes fell into the back of my head in disgust, but I joined her on the floor nevertheless.  
Her eyes lit up in surprise at my movement, but her face brightened as she faced me.  
“Okay this one's easy. It’s a side plank with rotation. So what you do is you grab one of these,” Laura grabbed a dark blue ten-pound weight that was resting in between us “and you get in a plank position.” Her body made a perfect slope that was adjacent to the wooden floor and she turned her head to look at me. “Then you just lift the side of your body with the weight up into the air and hold it for a few seconds.” she demonstrated, her toned arms and abbed stomach once again presenting themselves to me.

      We locked eyes for a few seconds before she dropped the weight, rolled it over to her other hand, and then repeated the same process.  
“See? Easy. And it’s only a set of ten so you should be fine. Here.” the matching ten-pound weight was rolled my way and I picked it up with ease.  
“If I’m gunna do this, I want to be as comfortable as you are, sweetheart.” I announced.  
Laura got back in her planking position as she began to ramble, “Oh! Yeah! That’d probably be best. While leather pants _are_ pretty snazzy, they’re not the most comfortable to work out in. If you want, you can go in my dresser and pull out this _insanely_ comfortable pair of yoga pants that I bought from Lululemon the other day. They were finally having a sale so I figured I should jump on it right then and there..even though I don’t wear yoga pants too often while working out, they’re still pretty nif—”  
I silenced whatever long tangent she was about to continue to go off on once I rose to my feet and began to peel the clothing from of my body.

I had _definitely_ made a mental note of her gaping mouth and fixed eyes.

      “Uh—or you could...do it in your undies...that’s—that works too.” she choked as I rejoined her on the floor in just my black sports bra and matching cheekys.  
We were both still for a moment and Laura tried her best to look everywhere but at my body.  
How modest.  
But I was never one for propriety.  
“I feel I’m a lot better with my hands without clothing. It allows me to be more...fluid. Plus, I’ve already grown accustomed to getting my dose of cardio without clothes” I suggestively smirked.  
I could hear her breathing picking up speed and she swallowed a lump that was in her throat.  
“Uhm...yea. Whatever works best for you...Okay. Well...here, you go first. I want to check your form.” she broke out of her planking stance and sat on her legs.  
I positioned myself in the same plank position she had showed me before jeering, “Uh huuh, because it’s _just_ my form you’ll be checking out.”  
I didn’t even have to look at her to know those cheeks had flooded with her beautiful blood.

      I didn’t wait for a response before I began, swinging the weight up into the sky. Apparently I had gone a little _too_ quickly, because I lost my balance and fell back onto my butt, the sound making a loud “slap!” against the wooden floor.  
Laura was giggling and she waddled over to me on her knees.  
“You’re going up too quickly. And when you do go up, it’s not so much of a swinging motion as it is just opening up. Start over.”  
I scoffed. “Falling on my ass is usually a good indication that I should call it quits, cupcake.”  
She shook her head and began to reposition me back into the planking position, “When you fall, you get back up and try again. _Cazzimma_ .”  
I pursed my lips in retort but tried again, opening myself up a little slower this time.

      I held the weight above my body and used my forearm that was against the floor to keep myself stable. My body was trembling and I could feel myself losing my balance again.  
Without any warning, Laura’s hands had clasped around my waist, her touch charmingly smouldering my skin.  
“You're hips are hanging. Keep your body at an angle.” she commanded as she popped my waist back into line.  
Her warm hands against my chilled body sent a hot shiver down my back and I swear to God I _almost_ moaned in response.  
**_What the hell is wrong with me?_ ** **_  
_ ** “ _Really_ don’t think this is for me, creampuff.” I breathily grunted under the weight of the...weight.  
Apparently vampiric, superhuman strength was no match for Laura’s “simple” workout.  
A gentle hand began to trail up my arm possessing the weight, ceasing its movement at my wrist to constrict it before stretching my arm out. **_  
  
_ **

      Our eyes were glued to each other.  
My skin was enjoying the _heavenly_ temperature of her soft hand against it, my eyes were absorbing and reflecting the poorly-hidden lust that glossed across the cupcake’s eyes, and my body as a whole was enthralled in the undeniable sexual tension in the room.  
She was eyeing my lips. We were so close to each other...all I had to do was lean in…

      Her hand began to slowly trail down my fully extended arm, making it quaver a bit.  
I was weak to her touch.  
Whatever superhuman strengths I was cursed with had been subjugated by the creampuffs gentle touch.  
In all my years of roaming this ambivalent Earth, I have never once encountered any mortal nor immortal with the ability to render me, a centuries old walking machine of death, _powerless_ from a mere graze of flesh against my own.  
I didn’t know what was happening, but I had lost all control of my motor nerves.  
In it’s place, my extremely sharpened sensory nerves.  
I could feel every living cell on her fingertips coming into contact with every undead cell on my arm...hear every hitched breath and exaggerated heartbeat...I could even taste those enticing lips…

      I was so lost in my trance of no longer having any control over my body that I didn’t even feel my hand unclenching around the weight.  
The ten-pound weight came crashing down on my hip-bone.  
“Fuck!” I groaned in pain.  
Once again my body made contact with the floor, but it hurt a helluvalot more this time around than the last time.  
“Ooh my gosh! Carmilla! Are you okay?! Oh my God I am _so_ sorry! I totally meant to just extend your arm out I didn’t mean to—are you hurt?” Laura rubbed a hand against my hip bone, inflicting more pain than she intended.  
“I’m fine…” I breathed, propping myself up with my elbows.  
**_I don’t know what the hell that was, or what the hell she just did...but...I think I...I think I want her to do it again…_ ** **_  
  
_ **

      “ _Yeesh_ ...that’s going to be one heck of a bruise! ...Do you need something? I feel like this is completely my fault, and I am 175% sorry!” She slowly began to rise to her feet. “Do you want some ice? Or some Bengay? The ice would probably be better; I think I have an icepack sitting in the freezer, I’ll go get—”  
I cut her off by sitting up—which, due to the area in which the weight fell, _ow_ —and quickly pulling her back down by her hand.  
We glared into each other’s eyes for a brief minute, searching for any indication that what we both knew we were about to do wasn’t okay.  
I didn’t find any, and I’m sure she didn’t either because her hands gently clasped to the sides of my face.

      We were both watching each other tenderly, pupils rapidly moving as we read each other’s eyes and watched each other’s lips; planting phantom kisses all over each other’s faces.  
I had never been this nervewrackingly drawn to someone the way I am to Laura.  
I didn’t _want_ to kiss her...I **_needed_ ** to.  
Like only a kiss from her would save my bastard soul from the admonishing flames of a loveless, lonely life.  
**_Just_ ** — **_do it, Karnstein._ **

 

      It was like she had heard my inner coax, for we both ended up leaning into each other in the same breathtaking instance.  
The second our lips touched, the room around me vanished.  
We were floating, a powerful bright light of energy encompassing us.  
I felt as if we no longer were apart of this Earth. Like we had transcended into an oblivion of light and absolution and…  
I won’t say love.  
I don’t _love_ her...  
I can’t.

But goddammit did it feel _just_ like it.   **  
  
**

      This synergy of passion had developed from our hungry kiss. So powerful, it made the hairs on the back of my neck stand.  
Laura slung her thigh around my stomach to place herself on top of me, not breaking the contact of our lips.  
I wrapped my arms around her waist to draw her in closer to me and she inhaled sharply once the skin on our stomachs had finally made contact.  
Everything about this felt... _right_ .  
Her lips felt like they _belonged_ against mine...like both our bodies and mouths were designed to complete one another.  
Like she was the key to my centuries old lock.

 

      I slid my hands down to cup and squeeze her ass, and her legs around my waist tightened in response.  
The pressure had caused me to grimace and groan into her mouth. Although it felt amazing to have her like this, her legs were putting intense pressure on my now very sensitive hip bone. There was no way I was going to stop this to relieve the pain, though. The positives absolutely trumped the negative.  
Laura broke the kiss and whisked her light brown hair to the side before beginning to suck along my jaw and down my neck.  
She ceased her movement over where my pulse point would be—if I had one—and sucked roughly at the localized skin.  
My mouth gaped and my eyes fluttered from her action and goddammit the amount of clothes she still had on was now irritating the hell out of me.

      “Cupcake…” I panted, “What do you say we move this show somewhere a little more comfortable. Preferably with _a lot_ less clothing...that is—if you’re comfortable with that.”  
Laura dragged her lips back up my neck before detaching and leaning her forehead against mine.  
Her eyes, literally _just_ drowning with lust, had switched to that of worry.  
“Carm...I—I have to...I have to tell you something…” she looked down as her voice trailed.  
**_Uh oh...please don’t tell me she has a girlfriend…_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Or even worse—a_ ** _boy_ **_friend._ ** **_  
_ ** **_Or even worse worse_ ** — **_she’s_ ** _married_ **_._ **  
“You’re scaring me, creampuff.” I voiced, backing up so that we were facing each other.  
She dropped her hands to my shoulders, her eyes still not meeting mine.

      “Well—this...I _really_ enjoy this.And...well...I think it’s fairly obvious that I’ve liked you for quite sometime now...because it’s obvious that you’ve found some sort of liking to me. And I _want_ to have sex with you—so _very very_ bad...but I uh—” she paused once more.  
I absentmindedly began to run the tips of my fingers down her broad shoulders.  
She closed her eyes and took a long, deep breath. After a few anticipation-filled seconds, she opened her eyes and finally looked back into mine.  
“Carm I’m a virgin.” she finally spat out, her cheeks turning red with embarrassment.

      I sighed a great sigh of relief.  
I had honestly expected something _a lot_ worse to come out of her mouth.  
“Cupcake, you scared the living _hell_ out of me. I thought you were about to tell me you had some sort of inoculable, salivary transmittable disease or something.” I laughed with a hand over my heart and the other on her shoulder. “Don’t worry, sun dance, we won’t do anything you aren’t comfortable with. I’m perfectly content with making out with you in the middle of our dorm room floor.”  
Laura shook her head. “No...that’s the thing...I—I _want_ to—do the things...I want to have sex with you.” she finally blurted.  
If my heart was beating, it would have stopped dead right then and there.

      Apparent virgin Laura Hollis _wants_ to have sex with the terrifying, bloodsucking monster from folklore?  
Laura Hollis wants to lose her virginity...to me?  
Any other situation...any other girl, I would have said ‘hell yeah’ and dived right in.  
But with Laura, I hesitated.  
I don’t know why...but I hesitated.  
Was she sure about this?

      “Laura,” my lips quavered at the sound of my own voice saying her name, “Are—Are you sure? Losing your virginity can be a big deal, cutie...I just—I wouldn’t want you to...y’know—regret your decision later.”  
She smiled softly. “If you’re worried that I’ll regret the fact that I’d be losing it to you, you have nothing to worry about. This _may_ be kind of weird...but...I’ve thought about it. I mean although you are a _very_ inconsiderate and messy roommate who I’m pretty sure purposely tries to get under my skin, there’s just—like I said, this is going to sound weird—but there’s just… something about you...that I’m drawn to...something...magical.”  
I rose an eyebrow at her.  
“No, it’s not your vampirism, mistress of the snark. It’s just... _something_. I—I trust you.” she confidently smiled.

 

      This was a lot to take in.  
She _trusted_ me.  
Laura Hollis actually _trusted_ me.  
And here I was, originally supposed to seduce the poor girl all the way to Mother’s arms.  
...just like Elle.  
I looked down not particularly seeing anything as my mind began to race.  
At least I knew I wasn’t the only one who felt the supermagnetic force of _whateverthefuck_ that was attracting us to one another.

      “And Carm—don’t worry. I’m not expecting some sort of “college romance” to ensue after the fact. If we don’t end up together—well, then it’s fine. I’ve worked out all of the details in my head already.” She brushed my bangs out of my eyes as she spoke.  
I attempted to regain my composure by smirking, “Mmm, you’ve seen to give this some extensive thought, sweetheart. How long have you been thinking about this?”  
Laura’s cheeks reddened again as she quietly smiled, “Mayyyybe since the first time you tied that dried bat-wing around my wrist.”  
I rose my eyebrows in surprise. “Damn you really have been sitting on this for quite some time now, huh?”  
She nodded. “This is why I’m certain of my decision. I...I want it to be you.”

  
      It was scary how much trust she had placed into my hands.  
I wasn’t use to caring about anyone else’s feelings when it came to matters like this because I usually didn’t care to stick around too long after the fact.  
But with Laura...I had already felt as if she belonged in my life. And now, I didn’t want her to leave.  
I wanted to show her that if this were 300 some years ago when my heart would beat as fast as hers...if the roles were reversed and I was able to revert who my first love, my first shared moment of true intimacy was with, I would choose her too.  
I would drop Elle, the one and only love of my life, to be with Laura a thousand times over.  
**_But you’re not in love with her...don’t let it get that far, Mircalla._**

 

      “Well...say something.” Laura urged, her doe-eyes widening slightly.  
I grinned and rested our foreheads against each other.  
“Then I won’t let you down, buttercup.”  
And with that, I lifted her up by the waist with me as I rose to my feet and gently placed her down on top of my bed.  
She giggled as I climbed on top of her, slowly crawling my way to her like the feline that I was.  
“Mmm, I’m going to enjoy this.” I grinned slyly before kissing her softly.  
Just like before, I had transcended back into our own little glance at heaven.  
This time, everything felt more raw, and passionate.  
I could feel every cell, every hair...sense the movement of her blood through her veins.  
I could hear her body crying out to me and nothing on this beautiful planet had ever sounded sweeter.

      My hands began to travel down her body, one hand stopping to slide under her colourful sports bra to roughly massage her breasts, while the other one slid down her abs and onto the spandex material of her volleyball shorts.  
Laura broke the kiss to softly moan into my ear once I applied pressure to her clit from through her compression shorts.  
I began to move my fingers in slow circles on her clit, making sure to add the slightest amount of pressure each time I looped around.  
Her eyes shut and she began mewling to my touch while simultaneously grinding her hips against my fingers.  
I chuckled. “Someone’s eager.”  
She didn’t open her eyes to respond to me, she just let out a breathy, “Shut up.”

 

      “Now creampuff,” I started as I removed my hand from her shorts and back up to her breasts, “That’s no way to talk to the girl who’s about to make you feel pleasure from the top of your head down to the balls of your feet.”  
I began to strip her sports bra off of her and she helped peel it off before I tossed it onto the floor.  
I immediately attached my mouth to her right nipple, lapsing my tongue over it. My other hand was busy grabbing at the other swell of her chest and her breath was hitching in response.  
Her nipples had hardened from the stimulation and she buried her hands in my hair.  
I kissed my way from her nipple, to her areola, to her collarbone, and past her neck until I had reconnected our lips once again.  
My hands began to trail down her body again, this time taking her volleyball shorts with them.

      Much to my surprise, Laura wasn’t wearing any type of underwear.  
“Are you sure you weren’t planning this, sweetheart?” I teased in between kisses as I sent her shorts flying off of the bed.  
She brought a hand out of my hair to cup my face as she panted, “I never—work out with—underwear.”  
**_Mental note made._ **  
I sucked down her jaw and before I brought myself to suck down on her throbbing pulse point, I joked, “Mmm well in that case, remind me to cause some sort of damage to the gym to...stall...it’s reopening.”  
Laura snickered, but before she could respond, I swiftly swiped a finger through the creampuff’s immensely wet folds.  
She whined and her hips jerked from the contact.  
I smiled against her throat and began to roughly suck my way down her body.  
I could hardly wait to see her face when she saw the amount of hickies she was about to have all over her body.

      I sucked my way all the way down to her thighs, ignoring her throbbing centre to tease her a bit by sucking and gently nipping at her inner thighs.  
“Caarmm...I may be a virgin...but I can tell when you’re trying to—to tease me.” Laura breathily whined after I continued to nip at her trembling thighs.  
I smirked but decided I’d go easy on her _this time_ , so I flattened my tongue against her length.  
Laura grunted a moan as her hands quickly gripped my unmade bed.  
I repeated my action, but attached myself to her clit directly after.  
Her lower body jolted yet again and she let out a shaky breath.  
“Hmgnh…” she moaned from above me, one of the hands in my hair quickly abandoning it’s post to grip one of her breasts.  
I gently swiped a finger through her folds, relishing just how turned on she actually was.

      My eyes glided against hers and I found her looking down at me _pleading_ me to go inside.  
Like I said, I’m not one to disappoint...especially if it’s in regards to Laura...but I wanted to make sure of something first.  
I took my lips off of her clit and let my hand take its place, slowly palming it.  
“This may be a fairly..odd question to ask right now but I have to know. Have you ever...played with yourself? Put anything...inside…? Fingers, toys... _vegetables_ ?” If I had blood running through my veins, it would have _flooded_ my cheeks.  
Laura bit her lip as her hips continued to jolt every so often.  
We both shared our embarrassment because her cheeks did what mine couldn’t do.  
“I uh...yeah...fingers...and—maybe...a few times—uh...wait, why do you need to know this?” she stammered.  
“A few times what, creampuff?” I ignored her question.  
She sighed loudly once I stopped moving my hand against her.  
“I _maaay_ have sneak bought….a uh—a...a dildo...when my dad wasn’t...home…” Her entire face was red with embarrassment and she refused to look back down at me.

      “Well, well, well, not as innocent as I originally presumed.” I smirked. “Well cupcake, then I don’t have to go through the whole “it might hurt a little” spiel...but by all means, if you’re uncomfortable with something, or something actually _does_ start to hurt, don’t hesitate to stop me.”  
She reconnected our gazes and nodded reassuringly.  
I smiled and kissed her inner thigh before returning to my original position on her clit.  
With that, I began to bring a very shaky finger up to her opening.  
I don’t know why I was so nervous.  
I had _hundreds_ of years of experience pleasuring women, and I always did so with such a clear conscious.  
But now...I felt like I was back in Elle’s bedroom in 1699 about to have sex for the first time.  
Except this wasn’t Elle...it was...someone...better.  
It was Laura Hollis.  
I shut my eyes for a brief second to take it all in.  
Like I said, I’ve had sex with _many_ women over the years.  
But today...I felt like I was having sex for the first time.  
I was scared—but hopeful.  
I felt every emotion one could possibly have at a time like this.  
But I was ready.

      Laura had looked down at me, probably wondering why I hadn’t done anything yet.  
Before she could say a word, I slid a finger easily through her folds.  
The beautiful human above me drew in a sharp breath and slid her hand back down to my hair.  
I started off slowly, not thrusting too quickly or with too much aggression.  
“Carm—it’s okay...you can go...a little faster.” Laura chimed every other breath.  
I nodded and picked up the speed, quickly pacing my finger inside of her and curling every so often.  
The cupcake began to moan silently, her hips catching a thrusting pattern against my finger.  
She propped herself up on her elbows and we met eyes for a brief second before I curled my finger in her.  
Her eyes shut and she whimpered.  
“Carm...more…” she panted.  
Of course I delivered, sliding another finger into her.

      She fell back against the mattress and arched her back.  
My tongue was still stroking against her clit as I curled those two fingers in her.  
“OhmyGod…whoa...” her voice sounding more and more like whispers.  
Her coos seemed to fuel my desire, and my gentle nature was gradually decaying. In it’s place was my primitive, animalistic constitution.  
I suddenly wanted this to be more than just a display of tender infatuation and passion.  
I wanted her _screaming_ out to me, scratching my back, biting my shoulder, tugging my hair, hips grinding and writhing like a bubble about to pop.  
I wanted her to _crave_ me after we were done.  
Just like how I craved her.

 

      My thrusts were becoming more and more aggressive, and her body was responding accordingly.  
“Fu—uck, Carm.” she moaned as her body lifted off of the mattress once again.  
Her outcries rang in my ear and sent splurts of electricity through my body...like they were actually giving me energy.  
She continued to grind herself against my face and fingers, and I was almost certain she was going to go over the edge soon.  
I added a third finger to the mass and her moans started to become tight shrills.  
Without any forewarning, my ears were suddenly burning from the cupcake’s outburst, “WAIT!”

 

      I stopped immediately and pulled out and away from her as quickly as possible.  
**_Did I do something wrong? Was I hurting her? She sounded as if she were enjoying it. Maybe the weight of the situation has finally hit her and she no longer wants to continue...what if she’s realized that she...doesn’t want me?_ ** **_  
_ ** I tried to shake away the feeling as I stood on my knees below her.

 

      “Laura? What’s the matter?? Are you alright?? Did I hurt you?? Was that too many fingers...I’m sorry I should’ve asked…” My tone was urgent and my face plastered with concern.  
Laura’s chest heaved as she laughed.  
“No—no Carm i’m fine. I’m more than fine. It’s just—I have a proposal.”  
I sighed a sigh of relief.  
“Jesus fucking Christ, cupcake. You’ve got to get better at these things or you’re going to give my undead heart a heart attack.” I joked.  
“Sorry...subtly isn’t my thing sometimes...but anyway...uhm...so...one night when you weren’t in—i decided to do some cleaning...and I had cleaned both your area and my area. And well—as I was cleaning...I _maay_ have gone under your bed—and I _maay_ have seen...something...that I uh...wouldn’t mind you using…” her face was red again as she was stammering.

 

      I probably _should_ have been upset that she was snooping around in my things—even though I’ve done plenty of snooping on her behalf—but I was actually kind of...thrilled.  
“I mean...I don’t necessarily know how it works...but it looks—fun.” she continued when I didn’t make any movements.  
I smirked and bent over the side of the bed to get the item in question.  
What she had seen was my strapless strap-on that I had bought a few months ago. I hadn’t really used it on anyone yet seeing as half of my “study buddies” weren’t too keen to bring a fake dick into the equation—even though it was not coloured like one and did not resemble one but hey...and to all their own kinks...or lack thereof.  
I pulled it out from the shoe box it was residing in and brought it back up to show Laura, a haughty smile on my lips. “You mean this?”  
Laura’s eyes widened at the sight of it and she bit her lip _very_ seductively.  
It was turning _me_ on just thinking about plowing it into her.  
She nodded and sat up on the bed, her head now level with my breasts.

      Laura began to kiss my wrist holding the strap-on and made a trail up my arm before making her way to the swell of my chests.  
I set the strap-on to the side as she began to remove my sports bra and then slid her hands down to my waist to tug on the edges of my underwear.  
“If I would have known—strap-ons got you so _hot and bothered_ —I would have pulled it out...earlier.” I sarcastically sighed as I adjusted myself so that she could slide my underwear off.  
She smiled but rolled her eyes before reconnecting our lips.  
I pressed my weight against her and she fell back on the bed, her hands trailing down my back to cup my ass.  
I exhaled at the contact and she smiled against my lips.  
After a minute I pulled back from her and picked up the black strap-on that was resting next to us.  
“Now this one…” my voice had taken a huskier tone, “Might hurt a little.”  
She kept her gaze on me as I began to bring the toy in between her legs.  
“I don’t care.” she breathed, smiling slightly.  
**_That’s what I like to hear._ **

 

      I gently rubbed the part that was going to go inside of me against her dripping folds, causing Laura to whimper with anticipation.  
As a teaser, I slowly pressed it against her opening, but pulled out just before it could fully go through.  
“Carmilla—I swear to God if you don’t just fuck me…” she griped, scowling at me.  
I chuckled before twisting it back to my direction. “Yes ma’am”  
I slid the end that I was just holding against her into myself, moaning silently as I did so.  
I didn’t even realize how wet _I_ was in contrast to Laura.  
She was biting her lip as she watched me adjust the end inside of me so that it wouldn’t slip out, my breath hitching occasionally at the plastic moving around my walls.  
  
      Once it was all set, I brought my hand down to quickly rub against her clit.  
Her legs opened even wider at the friction and her head lolled back.  
“Ready, sun dance?”  
“Just go!” she commanded, her tone urgent.  
I did as I was told and began to slowly insert the shaft into her.  
Laura’s toes curled against the sheets, and her hands and eyes tightened.  
“Ooh!” she whined as more and more of the shaft began to disappear into her.  
Once it had gone as far as permitted, I began to slowly back out.  
The movement made my end of the shaft dip and press against my own walls. I moaned in response.  
I continued this slow, fluid movement, and her breaths began to slowly form into loud whimpers.

      I grinded myself against her, one hand on the hip that wasn’t bruised, and the other on Laura’s hip.  
Her back arched into me and her hips began to find their own grinding pattern against me.  
The friction was continuously making the shaft in me crash against my walls and my lip was quivering from the pleasure.  
“Oh my God...Carm please...harder…” her moan was melting in my ears, making my whole body tremble.  
I pulled out of her for a second as I responded, “Your wish is my command, cutie. Turn over for me.”  
Laura obeyed and rested flat against the bed.  
I ran my hands over her ass, massaging it roughly for a second before sliding my hands to her hips to lift her to her knees.  
“Let your hair down.” I commanded as I continued to rub my hands against her ass.  
She obeyed and let her hair fall back against her bare, arched back.

      “I’m going to need something to grab.” I cooed in her ear before slowly shoving the shaft back in through her folds.  
She moaned as I did so, her hand balling the sheets into her fists.  
This time I gave at it, aggressively slamming my front against her rear.  
The pressure it was placing on the nub inside of me felt _amazing_ .  
Laura was showing her appreciation in the form of very loud shrills.  
I continued to slam myself against her, pain shooting up the side of my body every time her ass cheek banged against my bruised hip bone.  
A plethora of loud “fuck”’s and “right there”’s and “faster”’s began to fill every air of silence in the room and I was certain there was absolutely no way the people in the rooms surrounding us couldn't hear every goddamn moan...every crash of skin against skin.  
But I didn’t care.  
I wanted them to _know_ that Carmilla Karnstein was fucking Laura Hollis so undeniably well that she was unable to control the words spilling out of her mouth.

 

      I grabbed a good chunk of her hair and tugged roughly on it, causing her head to shift backwards towards me.  
“Carm…ohmyGOD!” she was a screaming, writhing _mess_ .  
I was so incredibly turned on that my fangs had shot out of my mouth, sharply grazing my bottom lip.  
I myself was whimpering; I couldn’t stop the sounds from escaping my mouth.  
The friction felt _so good_ , and mixed with the slight pain from my hipbone...I honestly could have lost myself right then and there.  
I could tell Laura was close from the way her body was trembling.  
But I wanted her to look at me while she went over the edge.  
So I slowly pulled out, the shaft vibrating inside of me.

      Her lower body was still trembling, despite the fact that I had pulled out.  
“Turn.” the command came out more as a moan.  
She weakly complied, her legs shaking as she reopened them for me.  
I re-entered her for the last time fairly quickly, causing her whole body to jolt.  
I bent over her and attached our lips together, all the while maintaining a sharp thrusting pattern into her lower half.  
I placed my hands against the headboard of the bed to keep myself stable, and Laura began to drag her nails down my back.  
“OhmyGod I can’t—I don’t think—” she was crying into my mouth.  
I was moaning with her, the stinging of the probably open wounds going down my back from her nails and the feel of the nub shifting inside of me and the frequent painful tingle of my bruised hipbone was all proving to be _too much_ .

      “What’s your name?” I grunted, pulling away from her lips to read her face.  
Her eyes were rolling back into her head, her nails dug further into my back, and her entire body was violently shuddering.  
She was moaning so loud that I was certain someone was going to come to our room to ask us to shut the hell up.  
“What’s your name, cupcake?” I asked one more time, feeling my own walls tightening.  
She shook her head. “I—I don’t…”  
Before she could finish, I attached myself to her shoulders and used all the strength I had left to thrust myself _extremely_ fast against her.  
She was _screaming_ .  
“Caarm!” She cried, her nails _definitely_ breaking through the skin on my back.  
We were moaning together until I had finally hit _the_ spot for both her and I.  
We both went over the edge, filling the already loud room with one last throaty moan from each of us.

      Her body shook under me and emptied itself out against me, and mine did the same on top of her.  
“Laura.” I huskily whispered her name, continuing to thrust into her so that we both could ride out our orgasms.  
She rejoined our lips as I continued the slow and steady thrusts into her.  
This kiss was slow and passionate. A complete contrast to what we had just done.  
Once our orgasms had both subsided, I pulled out of her slowly.  
My hands trembled as I removed the other half from out of me and tossed it to the side.  
I was so incredibly weak that I allowed myself to sprawl on top of Laura, our chests heaving against the other's.  
After a minute of silence, Laura whispered, “Wow.”

      I absentmindedly pressed kisses against her collarbone.  
To my utter demise, the butterflies I felt for her hadn’t gone away after reducing her to the screaming, writhing mess.  
If anything, they intensified.  
**_Shit...I think—I think I may be...falling...for this girl…_ ** **_  
_ ** Our breathing stabilized and Laura kissed my shoulder.  
“Oh—oh my God! Carm I’m so sorry...I didn’t realize I—are you hurt??” she shrilled all of a sudden.  
“What are you talking about?” I hummed, my eyes closed as I was tracing her collarbone with my finger.  
“Y—your back...it’s...it’s all torn up.” she responded shakily.  
I waved it away.  
“It’s okay. Vampire healing abilities will kick in eventually. Besides, I like them there. A good reminder that I made the seemingly innocent Laura Hollis cum so hard she forgot her own name.” I looked up at her and grinned, my fangs still showing.

      Her face turned red once again.  
I think embarrassing her was my newest favourite thing to do to her.  
You know… right after making her cum.  
“There was—a lot going on...I couldn’t think straight. Who even asks someone what their name is during sex?” She scoffed.  
I curled my arm around her neck and began to press gentle kisses against it. “Me.” I smiled.  
I could feel Laura’s cheekbones rise in a smile and I began to kiss over the already bruised areas on her neck.

      “Hey...Carm…” Laura croaked silently after a brief moment of silence.  
“Hmm?” I continued to suck rough kisses against her neck, enjoying the way her throat vibrated against my lips.  
She pulled my face up to hers before trailing a hand down my body.  
The warmth of her hand was burning down my body. Like she was branding her fingertips into my skin. _Laura, Laura, Laura_ .  
“Can I—can I do you?” her voice remained soft and she looked at me with the most innocent look on her face.  
I bit my lip.  
Never have I ever let anyone on this God forsaken planet fuck me with a strap-on.  
I liked the air of control.  
While I was always willing to let women go down on me, I _never_ allowed them to dominate me with any type of toy.  
So _why the creeping hell_ was I loving the idea of Laura slamming me against the wall with _my own_ strap-on? 

      “I mean—unless you’re not comfortable with it...then it’s fine.” Laura reassured, probably reading the look on my face.  
I took a deep breath.  
I was 110% certain that I had it _bad_ for this girl, because the words that left my mouth were, “Sure, sweetheart.”  
Her eyes lit up. “Really?”  
I felt a wall that I had spent _centuries_ building up come crashing down.  
I nodded and rose off of her.  
She sat up with me, reaching for the very wet strap-on.  
“Cool! I mean—I probably won’t be as good as you...but…” she looked at it a little confused.  
“How does this work?” she looked at me.

I chuckled and took it from her hands.

      “This end,” I held up the smaller end of the toy, “Goes inside of you. You may have to move it around a bit to keep it locked in place.”  
I guided the end towards her folds, rubbing it gently against it like last time.  
She flinched. “I’m like... _uber_ sensitive still.”  
Grinning, I mused, “Then this will be _lots_ of fun.”  
I continued to rub the nub against her, hoping to make her as wet as possible so there wouldn’t be difficulty placing it inside.  
“If I—cum again...once you put it inside—don’t laugh.” she breathed, her hips still flinching.  
My signature smirk spread across my face, “No promises here, cutie.”  
I moved the toy out of the way and began to gently run two fingers against her.  
Without a warning, I dipped my middle finger into her slowly and she moaned.  
I could feel how tight she was and knew that we probably wouldn’t last long.  
“H—heY...I said _I’m_ doing _you_ .” she breathed, laughing softly.  
I took my finger out and chuckled myself. “I know, cutie. Just trying to get you self-lubricated.”

 

      Without any further discussion, I slowly pressed the nub into her.  
“Oh fuck…” she gasped, her legs tightening.  
“You’re already fairly close to cumming again. So try to relax your lower body.” I instructed, as I gently stroked her legs.  
She relaxed under my hand and I grinned.  
Before she could so much as breath, I brought my face down to the toy and slowly licked it, gathering the taste of Laura in my mouth.  
I then clasped my mouth around it, looking up at Laura as I did so.  
She looked _so_ turned on that it was turning _me_ on again.  
  
      Once I had cleaned the cupcake's cum off of the toy and lathered it with my saliva, I laid back and opened my legs for her.  
I would never admit it to myself, but a piece of my heart had opened with my legs for this girl and for this girl alone.  
Laura adjusted herself so that she was on her knees and made her way towards me.  
“So I just...push it in?” she asked, holding the tip of the toy against my clit.  
“Lower, sweetheart.” I advised.  
She listened and the toy was resting comfortably in between my folds.  
I shivered. Being on the other end of this was something I was _not_ used to.  
“Now press against me slowly. You may want to hold my waist for support.”  
She obeyed, her slightly sweaty palms attaching to my waist as she slowly inched herself inside of me.

      We both moaned when she had entered me.  
She was going very slowly, trying to grow accustom to the moving nub inside of her while simultaneously keeping the toy inside of me.  
I didn’t mind, though. It was all apart of the process.  
Honestly, I didn’t mind how fast or how slow we went. And not only in regards to sex.

      I think she was getting the hang of it because she began to pick up speed, our clits banging against each other every so often.  
“Shit…” I moaned.  
The feeling of the shaft sliding against my already tight walls felt even more amazing knowing that Laura was on the other end of it.  
I may not have communicated it to her, but _I trusted her too_.

      She bent over me, her hair falling around my head so that I’d focus on the wonderful human above me, and she began to passionately kiss me.  
I returned the passion, of course, and she bit down on my lip.  
Laura was picking up her speed and grinding into me a bit more aggressively than before.  
I tossed my head back and howled, my toes curling with every aggressive thump.  
“Look at me.” Laura demanded, a hand trailing down my chest.  
I obeyed, my hands above my head falling off the edge of the bed.  
I couldn’t cease the pathetic whimpers of pleasure that were escaping my mouth, but Laura seemed to be enjoying them.

      She brought a hand up to my face, her thumb gently sliding my bottom lip down.  
My fangs pricked her gently as she did so, and I used _every ounce_ of perseverance within me not to bite down on her.  
**_I wasn’t going to ask her for any of her blood...not this soon.  
_ ** **_Maybe if a biting kink presents itself later on…_ ** **_  
_ ** “Laura, Laura, Laura.” I was chanting her name, my entire body taking in the impact of her powerful thrusts.  
We were both going over the edge a lot quicker now, but I wanted to regain some of my control.  
I rose up and forced my lower body down onto hers, causing us both to moan as she fell backwards on the bed.

      Without removing the shaft from inside of either of us, I began to grind down into her, my hips moving fluidly.  
I was riding her, my toned body rolling.  
The look she was giving me, like she had never been so turned on in her life, was all the coaxing I need.  
She help my hips in place as I rutted against her.  
Both ends of the toy were moving along with my hips, and I lifted my hair over my head with one hand while using my other hand to toy with Laura’s breasts.  
“Fuck!” We both whined in unison.

      I had regained the control, my part of the toy grinding into her just as much as her part was grinding into me.  
I was drunk from the friction and the control and the lust and the passion.  
However, Laura didn’t let my control last very long.  
She ceased my movement by holding my hips down and quickly thrusting upward.  
I was so taken aback by the movement that the wave of pleasure hit me like a fucking train and I screamed. “Fuckfuckfuckfuck...Laura!”  
She was whimpering herself, her hands tightening against my thighs.  
I could feel myself tightening even further, I was _so_ close.  
“Laura...I’m gunna—i’m gunna cum...oh fuck yes Laura like that.” I whined as she rubbed her thumb against my clit.  
“Carm…” she moaned my name just as her own legs began to tremble.

      I called out her name as well just as my arousal overshadowed me.  
I felt pleasure running down my back, shaking my toes, leaving my arms feeble in my hair.  
I came...and I came _hard._ _  
  
_

      My orgasm took a minute to subside, but Laura was still thrusting into me.  
I was _entirely_ too sensitive for it.  
“Baby...ooh babywaitfuckstop stop stop.” I incoherently stammered trying to lift off of her.  
Laura had moaned one more time before cumming, her hips shaking violently, causing the strap-on to vibrate inside of me.  
“Oh my God…” I closed my eyes and saw the Pleiades star cluster; the seven sisters...except—one was missing.

      There was just so much pleasure jolting through my body that I had indeed transcended into space and was witnessing the formation of the stars. They were bright against my closed eyelids, promising of a beautiful view but a rough landing.  
I pulled the toy out of me before falling next to her, a trembling mess.  
“F-fuck.” I sputtered, my eyes still closed.  
My body was still trembling from the intensity of that orgasm, and Laura wrapped her arms around me. Her touch was soothing my shaking body and I was most grateful for it.  
She pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead and I opened my eyes.

      When i opened my eyes, I realized why the last star was missing.  
It was because she was right here in front of me, as bright and beautiful as ever.  
I was transfixed. I was so enamoured by her radiant beauty and comforting warmth.  
**I was in love.** **  
  
**

      “So I’m your baby, huh?” Laura teased, breaking the inner sentimental moment I was having.  
I rolled my eyes but curled into her touch, “You know...I say the _darndest_ things mid-orgasm, creampuff.”  
She laughed and hummed, “Mmhmm. Whatever you say.”  
I couldn’t deny the amazing, tingly feeling I got from her saying, “I'm your baby”.  
**_I mean. I_ ** _guess_ **_I wouldn’t mind calling her mine…_ ** **_  
  
_ **

      I rolled us over so that she was the one cuddling into me, my back stinging against the ruined sheets.  
She drowsily placed her head in the crook of my neck and kissed it gently before silently humming, “Guess you should start working out with me more often, huh?”  
A wave of fatigue overcame me, but before allowing sleep to take over, I cooed, “Don’t worry, cupcake. We’ve got a lifetime of opportunities.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spent so long writing this omg.  
> Anyway...  
> I'm on vacation and I already spent three days on this so this will probably be my last update for the remainder of the week until I come home. This takes so much time out of my day lol.  
> Hoped you all enjoyed and are as ready for season 3 as I am ^_^  
> Catch me [here!](http://brokebackbianca.tumblr.com/)


	5. You and I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It was stupid and totally not the right time and she knew sex wouldn’t fix anything, but Laura was both angry and passionately in love and she wanted to take it out on Carmilla without doing anymore irrepressible emotional damage.  
> She wanted to fuck the sadness out of her ex-lover and out of herself."
> 
> TW: Depression

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii i know it's been awhile & I'm sorry things have gotten a bit more busy for me.  
> This was SUPPOSED to be for day 15 of the challenge "Sweet & passionate".....but something happened....idk what...and idk what day to put this under lmao so we're going to stick to that.  
> Also I'm sure you've noticed how SEVERELY behind I am so I'm not going to stick to any type of pattern with the challenge because I just really don't have the time and because I am a shitty individual
> 
> So this is very ANGSTY and SAD because I'm SHITTY so I'm SORRY TW: Depression, Suicidal tendencies [??]
> 
> Some songs I listened to while writing this in order of the scenes  
> 1\. [Breaking Up](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P7vJlImsyB8%20) \- Ne-yo  
> 2\. [Don't Go](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NFzDSudw10) \- Bring Me The Horizon [Harder on the ears]  
> 3\. [Like You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rc-emu-b9LU) \- Evanescence [Mentioned in fic]  
> 4\. [Hello](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MHGtlEYZBA) \- Evanescence  
> 5\. [You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Su1wK7iCQfQ&list=LLK8KAsYUSRwqUL5pNGSYiWg&index=116) \- Gold Panda  
> 6\. [First Position](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jhp2GHaq2CY&index=5&list=PLoFIwGTqIxStPMUhop6bCBWlY7FeDILMi) \- Kehlani  
> 7\. [Demon Limbs](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtJj_XrIYkE) \- PVRIS

**_I hate you_ **

 

               Those three pernicious words were bouncing off of the victorian styled walls of the study and indolently marinating every inch and crevice of the ex-lover’s hearts. Both parties were taken aback by the young girl’s debilitating words. Laura had never said those words to anyone in her entire life...like, ever (unless we’re taking fictional characters into account...then that’s a whole other story). She didn’t believe in harboring hatred or putting words as foul and apathetic as those ones out into the universe and into another person who was capable of feeling just as intensely as she herself did.  
But tonight, she had gone against her belief.  
  
               The weight of knowing that she was the cause for all of the calamity that was transpiring around the school—coupled with her upcoming midterms that she hasn’t studied for—had finally broken her. And as if all of that wasn’t enough, she was completely heartbroken over the fact that she was forced to live in a house with the only girl she believed she was capable of ever loving and not being able to do exactly that: _love her_.  
  
               Three weeks had already slipped in-between her fingers—Three weeks without Carmilla there holding her, kissing her, reading her poems as she began to fade off to sleep, or passionately ranting about how completely uninteresting Plato was to her—“Plato’s allegory of The Cave is _actually_ Socrates's...which is essentially that most people are close-minded imbeciles that are ignorantly opposed to the idea of changing their personalized view of the world. But... _duh_. He essentially chose the most conspicuous, _indisputable_ aspect about the human race and _disputes it_! If he’d given me something that I can _actually_ form an argument against in that aspect _,_ then I’d give credit where it’s due.”.  
Three weeks without the love that clung to her like a second skin and consumed her like a detrimental, bittersweet vice.

  
               Instead, Laura had been subjected to her ex-girlfriend returning home at odd hours of the night blooddrunk out of her mind, her constant disregard for her and the other individuals of the household by parading around practically in the nude, and—oh yeah, all of her deliberate attempts at getting under Laura’s skin _just for the hell of it_.    
It was all too much for poor, exhausted Laura. She was at her breaking point. And when Carmilla had brought Mattie home and essentially spent the entire afternoon ridiculing Laura and her attempts at saving the school while Laura was _in the same room_ (she was _finally_ trying to study for a midterm that she had in a few days), she exploded.  
  
               And here they were now, basking in the heartbreaking intensity of Laura’s brutal words, **_“I hate you.”_**  
Carmilla’s perfectly structured jaw locked and her body was frozen stiff.  
The fire in her eyes that once gained its fuel from centuries of built-up anger, frustration, and from her passionate love for the younger girl had been suffocated—deprived of its oxygen from the same individual who had originally kept it aflame. She had been reduced to nothing more than a wick lacking the ability to be relit, and her eyes gave off just how much Laura’s words had devitalized her.  
Laura had regretted the words the moment they had escaped her lips, and seeing what it had done to the vampire was tearing her apart from the inside out.

 

               Carmilla had turned into a statue; she wasn’t breathing or moving any part of her...she was just gazing into the other girl’s eyes as if she had just ripped her heart out right there in front of her.  
Laura reached a hand out to her ex, “Carm I didn’t...”  
Carmilla jerked away from her grasp and laughed humorlessly before breaking their gaze and looked up at the ceiling, shaking her head as if to suppress any tears wanting to escape.  
The vampire turned on the balls of her heels and began to storm out of the study.  
Laura followed her.

  
               “Carmilla wait...I didn’t mean that.” Laura ran up the stairs after her but Carmilla with her superspeed and all, was practically _floating_ away from her.  
“Of course you did, creampuff. I’m a monster, remember? Monsters are prone to hatred.” She scoffed matter-of-factly.  
The young girl followed the vampire into the bedroom they used to share—the Dean’s bedroom. Carmilla had allowed Laura to keep the bed and she usually ended up sleeping on the chaise in the study. A formality Laura knew she didn’t deserve but was absolutely grateful for.

               The vampiric goddess had already strewn a small black suitcase on top of the king sized bed and was rummaging through the drawers for what small amount of clothing she had in them.  
“Wh—what are you doing?” Laura questioned angrily as she stomped up to her love.  
Carmilla continued to shove things into the suitcase as she responded, “What’s it look like, buttercup? I’m leaving.”  
Laura was angry _out of her mind_ .  
Out of all of the selfish things Carmilla had ever done, she believed _leaving_ had to be the utmost self-centered one on the list.  
“You—you can’t just _leave_!” Laura shouted, her hands balling into fists.

               Carmilla laughed. “And why is that, huh? Are you not finished using the _nefarious vampire_ as a pawn in your self-righteous chess game of moral permissibility? You’ve made it very clear that you don’t want me here. And what other reason do I have to stay?”  
Carmilla viciously tossed a black tank top into the suitcase and paused, locking eyes with her human.  
Well...her ex-human.

               “I’m through playing hero and pretending that I care about the fate of anyone else’s life on this godforsaken campus other than yours. You want me to be the caped crusader and save you from the sadistic, psychotic monster holding you hostage. But cupcake, I think it’s about time you opened your eyes and see the situation for what it really is: I’m not the hero you’re searching for. I’m the villain. The monster that’s been holding you captive this entire time. And you’re the naive little damsel that’s been begging your captor to be your saviour.”  
Laura bit down on her lip harshly in an attempt to hold back the tears that were threatening to free themselves.  
“You can’t just—break my heart and then leave me in shambles...wondering how it is I’m supposed to just pick up the pieces and— _carry on_.” Laura’s voice was cracking and her throat was hurting from restraining her frustration for so long.

  
**_I hate that I need you._**

 

               Carmilla laughed. “ _Who_ broke _whose_ heart? Have you just forgotten about all of your blatant attempts to _change me_ , form me into _your_ idea of a “good and just” vampire?”  
Laura scoffed before angrily advancing towards the raven-haired girl, “Wanting you to be the best you that _I know_ you can be is my crime—my offense?! Trying to bring out the best in you while simultaneously helping those around us who are in trouble is how I “broke your heart”? Are you kidding me!?”

**_Do you even miss me at all?_ **

 

“No cupcake, it’s because who I am— _what_ I am... just isn’t enough for you to like me for _me_ and not for the heroic “knight in shining armour” that you keep painting me to be. You broke my heart because you took advantage of the fact that **_I love you_ ** , Laura. You and no one else.” Carmilla stepped closer into the younger girl.

  
**_You were everything to me._**

 

Laura paused.  
It was the first time Carmilla had ever professed her love for her with those three words.  
Three words that held the exact opposite meaning of the three words she had used earlier tonight.

 

**_It’s not enough, Carm._ **

 

               Their eyes were fixed on one another intently. They had stepped so close to each other that Laura could feel the vampire’s cold breath against her top lip.  
She hated this—this tension...the unresolved issues, the anger, the bickering.  
Carmilla thought her to be an abuser of love...scum of the Earth. And Laura couldn’t handle that.  
If Carmilla, the only person in the world that _truly_ knew every good, bad, and ugly aspect of Laura but still loved her anyway saw her as not _in_ love, but taking advantage _of_ love...then who was she really?  
Maybe Laura wasn’t the fair-minded, big-hearted girl that she thought herself to be.  
_Maybe_ **_I’m_ ** _the monster…_

  
The sadness that had been welling in Laura’s chest for the past three weeks had finally reached its carrying capacity.  
She exploded.

_I hate you_

**_  
_****_  
_**                The lighter haired girl began to sob violently.  
She was wailing, letting out months worth of repressed emotions as she did so.  
“I—I didn’t m-m-mean to...to hurt…you...I—” Laura sputtered in between sobs.  
Before she could finish the rest of her thought, her girlfriend’s arms were tightly wrapping themselves around her.  
Carmilla attempted to comfort Laura by smoothing her hair back and softly cooing, “It’s okay. Laura it’s okay. I’m sorry, darling. You’re okay. Everything is fine. I’m so sorry, Laura.”  
Laura buried her face into her vampire’s neck, her heavenly scent encircling her.

               She couldn’t stop crying. She didn’t realize how terribly she had been treating Carmilla...and she hated herself for it. She hated that she was so wrapped up in her own thoughts and too busy cleaning up her own messes and the messes of everyone around her that she failed to realize the extent of her neglect and mistreatment of this girl that loved her _so much_ .  
“I’m sorry...I’m sorry.” Laura apologized profusely.  
She was hugging Carmilla so tightly, afraid that the moment she let go was the moment she’d lose her.  
Forever.  
Carmilla placed desperate, loving kisses against the shorter girl’s scalp before resting her forehead against hers.

               But no matter how much she loved this—Carmilla holding her, peppering gentle kisses on her head, _loving her_ —she knew they were far from repair.  
And she knew she wasn’t the only guilty party in this—she wasn’t the only one at fault.  
It takes two people to create a wreck as terrible as the one they were in.  
  
               Laura felt disgusting.  
Disgusting because she was a very ugly crier, not those pretty, cinematic, quiet criers like the ones you see on television—no they were loud and violent and messy.  
Disgusting because she had managed to break the heart of the only individual who trusted her with their heart.  
Disgusting because she allowed said individual to break _her own_ heart.  
Disgusting because well... _she loved Carmilla too._  
She loved her and she needed her like a moth needed a flame, or like a fish needed water.  
Breathing without Carmilla felt more like suffocating; desperately scratching at the surface of nothing, _begging_ for her return.  
But breathing _with_ her meant abandoning all of her ethics, her teachings, her dogmas.  
It meant reconditioning herself to be perfectly content with the fact that hundreds of students were in danger and could possibly die _because of her_.  
But Laura just wasn’t okay with that. She didn’t think she ever would be.  
So how could the two just...pick up where they left off?  
Or rather— _how could they ever be together_?  
  
               “Carm...We—can’t.” Laura was still crying, but her words were a lot more comprehensible now.  
The vampire sighed above her and tightened her grip around the little one’s waist before muttering, “I know.”  
The pair was still for a moment, attempting to drown themselves in each other’s embrace for as long as they were permitted.  
“I—I—I don’t want you to...leave.” Laura sighed out, her head lifting so that she could look into the vampire’s eyes.  
Pain. Hurt. Betrayal. Agony...Hope.  
Those were the only things Laura found when she searched those beautiful shadowy eyes. She was certain it was a mirrored reflection of her own telling eyes that she was seeing.

               Carmilla moved a strand of Laura’s hair out of the girl’s face.  
“Sometimes...sometimes we gotta do things we don’t necessarily want to, sweetheart.” Carmilla’s voice was low and rough, like she _wanted_ to hit a nerve.  
She definitely succeeded.

               “Don’t go…” Laura could feel herself falling apart, hear her heart shattering.

 

 **_I need you…_ ** **_  
  
_ **

 

Carmilla lifted Laura’s chin gently, their eyes burning holes into one another’s heads.  
Laura knew her begging wasn’t enough, so she risked it—she filled the gap between their lips.  
Her salty tears were now resting on Carmilla’s cheeks, her shaky hands were tangled in Carmilla’s hair, and her lips were roughly pressed against the vampire’s.  
The kiss was hungry, desperate...painful. She could feel her ex’s lips quivering against hers, hear the sobs attempting to escape her chest.  
Laura **loved** Carmilla.  
The pair loved each other _so damn much_ . And the extent of each other’s love made itself present in their kiss.

               Laura could feel herself crashing and burning into the only stable ground she had found in this newly acquired life of exigencies regarding the supernatural and detrimental life-or-death situations.  
This was bad.  
She shouldn’t have done that.  
She shouldn’t be doing this.  
But it was the only bad decision she had made thus far that made her feel...alive and...whole.  
With Carmilla’s lips frantic against her own, she felt more like herself than she had the entirety of the past few weeks.

               Laura pressed herself against the other girl, forcing the two backwards until Carmilla’s back collided with the wall on the other side of the room.  
Their hands traveled each other’s bodies like they were erratically searching for the hearts that they had left with one another.  
Laura needed this.  
Carmilla’s lips against her own quenched the thirst in the pit of her soul that had been calling out to her for weeks: _Carmilla, Carmilla, Carmilla._  
“Cup...cake…” Carmilla breathed in-between the kisses.  
Laura quickly shut her mouth by trailing a hand down the vampire’s torso and looping a finger around the fabric of her pants created to enclose her belt.  
Their bodies were so close together that Laura couldn’t tell whether her sudden movements and jerks were her own or Carmilla’s.

 

               Laura began to lift the edge of her ex’s black shirt, her warm hand tingling against Carmilla’s cold, smooth skin.  
The vampire bit the younger girl’s lip and Laura moaned as she did so.  
It was stupid and totally not the right time and she knew sex wouldn’t fix _anything_ , but Laura was both angry and passionately in love and she wanted to take it out on Carmilla without doing anymore irrepressible emotional damage.  
She wanted to fuck the sadness out of her ex-lover and out of herself.

               Her hands were a lot more urgent against the cool skin of her partner as she attempted to lift the shirt over Carmilla’s head.  
She helped her and tossed it onto the floor before hungrily reconnecting their lips.  
Laura was memorizing it: the feel of Carmilla’s lips _craving_ hers, Carmilla’s beautiful scent, her hands, her hair, her skin... _Her._  
She didn’t know if she’d ever have her again like this and she wanted to savor every bittersweet moment.  
Carmilla quickly lifted the younger girl and walked them over to the bed, lips still attached.  
The vampire then began to suck rough kisses down Laura’s neck and Laura squirmed under the sensation.  
“Carm—don’t...stop.” she hadn’t realized that she was crying until she spoke.  
Her tears were all over her love’s cheeks and they were making their way down her own cheek.

               The vampire licked a stray tear that had made it’s way down the side of Laura’s face before she suddenly paused.  
They were both breathing heavily, eyes locked.  
Laura couldn’t stand looking into those seemingly apathetic eyes that _screamed_ her pain and infatuation, so she slid a hand into Carmilla’s raven hair and connected their lips yet again.  
The young girl was kissing her distressingly, as if with every peck she was begging “Please don’t leave me, please don’t go.”  
The vampire was responding accordingly, kissing her back to say, “I’ll never leave you. You are mine, you shall be mine... _you and I are one forever_.”

 

               But time is relative, and forever is just another empty promise when you’re already dead.  
The overbearing amount of heat and passion and love that was registering through every last one of Laura’s nerves from the kiss had suddenly ceased.  
Carmilla detached their lips, her eyes still closed and her hands now shakily pressed to Laura’s hips.  
The younger girl’s hand slid out from the vampire’s hair and began to trail down her perfectly structured cheeks and trace her sharp jawline.

 

 **_I want this forever._ ** **_  
  
_ **

 

Carmilla’s eyes opened eventually, and they were more telling than Laura would have wanted them to be.  
“Forgive me, Laura.” her voice was heavy and her words came out sounding more like a desperate plea.  
Laura tightened her grip around the girl, hoping to keep her in her arms a little bit longer.

 

 

**“Don’t go.”**

 

 

But she was already gone. A phantom lover. A ghost from her past.  
A memory.  
All that was left of her was the intense burn on Laura’s lips from the vampire’s desperate, loving kiss.  
She felt empty.  
Like the vampire had taken a huge part of her when she left her there all by herself.

 

She was alone again.  
But this time Carmilla Karnstein, the love of her life, was gone for good.

 

 

* * *

 

 

               “How is she?”  
Laura could hear Perry’s worried voice through the walls of the Dean’s bedroom.  
Two weeks had passed, and Carmilla was nowhere to be found.  
Of course Laura had to get back to more _pressing_ issues, like the sudden disappearance of the university’s only library...or the giant sinkholes filled with molten lava that were making very occasional, very random appearances. And of course she _did_ get to the issues. She had broadcasted the dangers of the campus and helped the Summers and the Zetas come to some type of agreement in rounding up enough troops to investigate the huge eerie area of where the library once was.  
She’d put on her best poker face the first four days, but the days that followed had swallowed her whole.  
_Carmilla was gone._

 

               “I—I dunno. I invited her to the Summer Society’s get-together via text but she never responded. And I’ve been banging at her door for the past five minutes trying to get her to eat— _something._ But no luck.” Danny’s voice was heavy and it put a strain on Laura’s already fractured heart.  
She didn’t want to hurt her friends, but she just physically did not have the capacity to entertain anyone—let alone _breathe_ without feeling like the weight of her depression was literally suffocating her.  
“Poor kid. I wish there was something we could do.” LaF’s voice.  
Brief silence.  
“This isn’t healthy...maybe we should—get someone? Carmilla even?” Perry’s voice.  
Danny scoffing, then growling, “She’s the one that turned her into this! We don’t need to bring her back! Stupid undead _leach_ . If I ever see that sorry piece of crap ever again…”  
The mention of Carmilla sent a sharp pain across Laura’s chest and she shut her eyes and hugged the pillow closest to her in response.  
Suddenly, the next song on the CD player across the room had played itself and Laura was utterly grateful for it.  
She couldn’t stand to hear her friends talk about her...or about Carmilla.  
She knew they meant well...but it made her feel as if she was—well...gone.  
Like her sanity had faded and she was just another lost cause. A shell of who she used to be.  
Even if it was true, she didn’t want to _feel_ that way—let alone have people think of her that way.

 

 _I hate me for breathing without you_ _  
_ _I don't want to feel anymore for you_ _  
_ _Grieving for you, I'm not grieving for you_ _  
_ _Nothing real love can't undo_ _  
_ _And though I may have lost my way_ _  
_ _All paths lead straight to you_

 

               ...actually, she would have _much rather_ preferred to listen to her friends.  
Laura didn’t even necessarily like this band.  
It was one of the band’s albums that Carmilla had managed to salvage from their dorm room before… _Christmas_ happened.  
It’s not that the band was _bad_ or anything, it was just that their lyrics were very dark and depressing and the entire group looked as if they were apart of some type of 2009 gothic, vampiric cult.  
They were definitely more Carmilla’s speed.  
And that’s why she couldn’t stop listening to them...because their music _screamed_ that poison-infused name that she loved to hate and hated to love. **_  
  
_ **

               She was out of tears. She had cried herself to sleep so many nights that she wasn’t sure her body was even capable of producing anymore.  
She knew just how pathetic all of this was...Crying and obsessing over a girl as apathetic as the one she had fallen for.  
Her dad would be _so_ disappointed if he could see her now.

 

 _I long to be like you_ _  
_ _Lie cold in the ground like you_ _  
_ _There's room inside for two_ _  
_ _And I'm not grieving for you_ _  
_ _I'm coming for you_

 

And her mom…  
Laura almost never allowed herself to think of her mother in times where she was as under the weather as she currently was.  
Because if whatever was bothering her happened to drag her _that_ far under...thoughts of her mom would absolutely _destroy her._ _  
_ But the lyrics...the song…

                 She’d never admitted this out loud.  
It was one of her deepest darkest secrets that she’d kept tucked away in the back of her mind.  
She never even told Carmilla this—afraid that she would think she were suicidal or in need of constant affirmation and attention (although she never really did mind if the attention was coming from Carmilla).  
But Laura had thought about it a few times...joining her mother.  
Relinquishing this wicked world and trading it for the peaceful promise of death.  
To be one with the woman she knew so little about but loved _so much_ .  
She despised the fact that she was never able to tell her mother just how much she loved and appreciated her...how much she wished she could have at least one more day with her.  
Laura thought that maybe if her life were to end, then she would have all the time in the world with her...

               It was a very dark and scary thought...and it was absolutely _nothing_ like Laura.  
But on days like this, days where her heart had sunk so far into her stomach that she could physically feel the acid corroding the rotting piece of flesh pumping her with existence, she allowed herself to bask in the melancholic thoughts she was normally so great at repressing.

               Apparently her body _was_ still capable of creating tears because once the song had ended and tore her out of the somber trance she was in, she realized she had cool tears streaming down her face and that she was lying on a now very wet pillow.  
“Stupid Evanescence...stupid...undead ex-girlfriend.” Laura spat under her breath, hoping that either her friends had gone off to interest themselves in something other than her misery or at least that they couldn’t hear her.  
Her silent sobs and majorly depressing thoughts had gained her a gnarly headache and she wasn’t in the mood to get up and take any aspirin for it.  
So she allowed herself to slowly drift off to sleep to the haunting, depressing melody of whatever song had played next.

 

 

* * *

 

 

               Laura wasn’t sure what time it was, but a familiar, mouthwatering scent had awoken the young girl from her slumber.  
The room around her was pitch black and for some odd reason, the CD player that she swore she kept on repeat was no longer playing any music.  
Weird.  
But she was more concerned about the smell that was making her stomach howl.  
She hadn’t eaten anything since...this morning?  
Or was the last meal she had last night?  
She couldn’t remember.  
But the scent was enticing...like a plate of freshly made cookies or a newly baked cake.

               Laura’s keen sense of smell for all things sugary and fattening hadn’t failed her, because when she flicked on the lamp next to her, she was staring at a plate full of very warm chocolate chip cookies.  
She was _literally_ drooling _._  
Without even questioning _how_ the cookies had even got into her room—you know, with her room being _locked_ and all—she immediately grabbed one from off of the plate.  
She had a deep appreciation for the way the cookie was practically melting in her hands and then in her mouth when she took a bite.  
Laura was humming, a small smile forming on her little face. She almost forgot how heavenly chocolate chip cookies tasted.  
After shoveling two more into her mouth, she was in _dire_ need of something to help wash away the residue of chocolate attached to her lips and throat.  
She slid off of the bed and began to sweep the crumbs first off of herself, and then off of the bed.

 

               “Want some milk with that, cupcake?”

 

               Laura froze.  
Every inch of her body had reacted to that familiar voice and that all-too-familiar nickname.  
She turned her head slowly to meet eyes with the girl who had infested her brain space for the past two weeks.  
Carmilla was smirking softly, her hand clasped around a glass of milk.  
Laura swallowed at the sight of her cynosure.

               Carmilla looked paler than normal and her eyes had dark rings signifying sleep deprivation around them...but regardless, she was here.  
Carmilla Karnstein was here.

               Laura didn’t know how to feel.  
She was angry—raging even—at the fact that Carmilla had just abandoned her and then reappeared two weeks later with cookies and milk as if everything were fine.  
But she was also overwhelmed with incredulous joy that she was _right here_ in front of her.  
Honestly, Laura didn’t know what emotion would make itself more prevalent, so she stayed quiet, her puffy eyes wide against the vampire’s sulken ones.

               Carmilla held the glass out further, “Well?”  
Without actually registering the movement, Laura slowly reached out and grabbed the cup. It felt like ice against her now very warm hand, awaking her from her state of shock.  
“C-Carm…” her voice was barely above a whisper.  
Carmilla smiled weakly at the girl and slowly walked into her.  
Laura was trembling.  
She didn’t even know if all of this was real or if she was still asleep and her dreams were just torturing her for the hell of it.

               "Wh—You’re...here.”  
Carmilla took Laura’s face in one of her hands and the two locked eyes, attempting to read each other.  
Laura’s cheek felt as if it were on fire.  
“I never left, creampuff.” Carmilla was the one whispering now.  
Laura shut her eyes to register her statement.  
_She. Never. LEFT?!_ _  
_ Suddenly all of the anger and pain that had accrued the past two weeks had begun to flood through her gates of composure.  
“Wha— _You never left_ ? What—what the hell do you mean _you never left_ ? You...You _abandoned me_ , Carmilla! You abandoned the entire _school_ ! You...You _promised_ that _everything was fine_ ...and then you just—LEFT!” Laura could feel her frustration transforming into tears. “You left me by myself.”

               Carmilla’s facial expression showed her agony from the young girl’s words, but Laura didn’t care.  
She stomped away from Carmilla and took a sip of the milk as she did so—attempting to ease the throbbing in her throat from suppressing her tears.  
“Cupcake…”  
“No! Okay? You can’t just, ‘cupcake’ your way back into my life with milk and cookies and act like everything is fine! Like what you did was okay! ...like _we’re_ okay!”  
Laura tightened her grip around the cup and she turned to face the vampire who was right at her heels.  
Carmilla sighed and looked down at the floor next to them.  
“You can’t just— _leave_ when things go south...you can’t just…” Laura shut her eyes and took a deep breath to calm herself. “Look...I said something...that I take full responsibility for and completely regret ever saying. It was—It was mean...and inconsiderate—and...it was a lie. I—I don’t hate you, Carm.”

               Carmilla looked back into her eyes, her expression one of shock.  
“In fact...it’s the exact opposite. I—I love you…”  
The raven haired girl was frozen, taken aback completely.  
“I love you...And the sad thing is—I always have, and I always will. But...you just...I asked you to stay...and you just—disappeared. I asked you not go…” She took another slug of milk in another failed attempt to hide her emotions.  
“Laura—I’m...I’m sorry. I—I shouldn’t have left you. And I’m sorry, cupcake. I...I checked up on you. Every night. I needed to know that you were...safe.” Carmilla was stammering (something Laura was not used to seeing) and advanced towards her. Laura took a step back.  
She didn’t know what was more upsetting, the fact that Carmilla had been around but wouldn’t let Laura see her, or the fact that Carmilla saw the emotional wreck she had become.

 

               “I needed you. And you weren’t here.” She couldn’t stop the tears anymore. Laura sat the cup of milk on the bedside table before crying, “Carm—you...I—”  
Carmilla didn’t let her finish whatever broken statement she was attempting to form because she quickly walked into her and crashed their lips together.  
The minute their lips touched, the colour had returned to Laura’s world.  
She could have sworn lightning had struck and the ground and walls were shaking and that she was no longer in the Dean’s bedroom.  
Carmilla’s lips burned against Laura’s with such a reverent passion that Laura was sure their lips were melting into one another.

 

               “I’m—sorry. I’m here.” Carmilla breathed in-between kisses.  
The tears flowing down Laura’s cheeks were now staining the other girl’s pale skin.  
Although everything in her told her that maybe she shouldn’t be as trusting of the girl who essentially broke her, she believed her lover's words.  
She even filled in the blanks of what she knew Carmilla had resting in the back of her mind:  
_You and I are one forever_ .

               It was messy, it was ugly, but it was also beautiful. Their love was too damaged for the picturesque depiction of love that storybooks portrayed, but it was _their_ love... _their_ story.  
And it was enough to leave them both believing that there was just _something_ magical about what they felt for each other.

               Laura placed all of her weight onto the vampire, causing her to sit on the edge of the bed.  
Carmilla immediately lifted Laura so that her legs were wrapped around her waist, and her cold hands began to grab at every inch of her lover as if there was a way she could physically assuage the utter pain she knew she had been experiencing these past few weeks.  
Her hands found their way under Laura’s disheveled brown tank top, but they froze after peeling it upward halfway.

               Carmilla opened her eyes and separated the kiss. “Is...is this…okay?”  
Laura smiled and removed the top and tossed it onto the floor before reconnecting their lips, wordlessly replying, “It’s perfect.”  
That reassurance was all Carmilla needed.  
In a blur, all of the clothes that the pair was wearing had been tossed about to some corner of the extravagant room.

               They were lying on top of the messy covers with their naked bodies pressed up against one another. Laura couldn’t help notice that they fit so perfectly together—like a centuries old lock and a rusty key.  
Carmilla’s hands were running along every edge and curve of her lover’s body, memorizing the way her warm skin reacted to her cool touch.  
Laura was like clay under her touch, molding into whatever her girlfriend was shaping her to be.  
She was still angry, but the anger that had made her head throb had moved it’s location in-between her legs.  
She wanted to exert all of her anger and love into reducing the all-powerful vampire to a trembling, writhing mess.

 

               In one swift movement, Laura flipped the two so that she was the one on top.  
It took Carmilla off-guard, and she took advantage of her confused state. Laura roughly separated her pale legs and began to gently suck and nibble her way down the perfectly structured body under her.  
The vampire was squirming under her lips, her breathing uneven.  
Laura was taking her time once she had reached her legs. She sucked especially hard at her inner thigh, causing Carmilla’s body to shake and a growl to escape her lips.  
“Get on with it.” She pleaded angrily.  
Laura detached her lips from around the vampire’s soft skin before responding, “You don’t get to tell me what to do right now.”  
The power behind the girl’s words sent a shiver down the vampire’s spine.

 

               Laura wanted nothing more than to grind her hips roughly into her girlfriend’s, but she thought she’d tease her a bit, make her suffer to even the playing-field.  
She resumed her position, this time purposely grazing a finger across her clit as she reached up to squeeze one of Carm’s perked breasts.  
Carmilla inhaled sharply at the contact, her stomach con-caving as she did so.  
The vampire was already so incredibly wet and it made Laura shiver with anticipation.  
She ran a finger quickly through her folds, collecting a significant amount of moisture on the finger before bringing it up to her lips.  
Carmilla’s eyes were glazed with lust and Laura could tell the vampire was losing her patience. Her hands began to rise from their position in her own hair and Laura knew what she was itching to do.  
“Touch me or yourself and I swear to God I’ll stop.” Laura said sternly.  
Carmilla’s arms relaxed back into her own hair but she huffed, “You're killing me, Hollis.”

               Laura licked her girlfriend off of her finger, Carmilla’s mouth gaping at the sight, and then responded, “Yeah, but you’re already dead.”  
All Laura needed was a taste—that familiar, delicious taste of her girlfriend that was exclusively for Laura and Laura alone—to get her going.  
She slowly inserted a finger into Carmilla while simultaneously looping her tongue around her girlfriend’s clit.  
The sensation made her hips thrash and a silent moan emerged from the raven-haired beauty.  
She looked up at her girlfriend as she found a good pumping and licking pattern.  
Carmilla was gripping her hair in one hand and tightly squeezing the fabric under them in the other. Her head was lolling back every few licks and her eyes were failing at remaining open.

 

               Carmilla was back, and she wanted to give her another reason to stay.  
Laura abruptly inserted another finger and began to roughly suck on her girlfriend’s clit.  
“Oh, fuck…” Carmilla’s moan was breathy and her body arched.  
Her pumping had gotten rougher in her attempt at exerting her frustration into her lover.  
With every strong plunge, the vampire’s back lifted and her moans got louder.  
“Laura...Laura...FUCK LauraLauraLaura…”  
Hearing Carmilla moan her name seemed to increase the throbbing between her legs and she moaned against her girlfriend’s clit.

               After a few more aggressive pumps, Laura could feel her girlfriend’s walls starting to tighten around her fingers.  
“Oh fuck it!” Carmilla suddenly growled.  
Without any other warning, the vampire quickly rose up from under her girlfriend and forced Laura against the bed. Before she even had time to react, Carmilla brought both of the young girl’s legs above her head and slid two fingers through her wet folds.  
Laura screeched a moan when Carmilla’s fingers unanticipatedly picked up a rough, furious rolling pattern inside of her.  
Her loud moans were silenced once Carmilla crashed their lips together, her fangs lightly scraping against the younger girl’s lips.

               Laura didn’t want to be the one to go over the edge first this time—not with all of the anger and frustration she still needed to exert.  
But the vampire’s grip on her ankles was too strong for her to break out of.  
Carmilla began to circle her thumb around Laura’s clit as she continued to roll into her, causing her back to tingle with pleasure.  
Laura broke the kiss to toss her head back and moan a series of “Oh my God’s” before Carmilla used her free hand to clasp around the younger girl’s throat.

               Laura had discovered that Carmilla had a choking kink one night up in the solarium after a few drinks and needless to say it startled the _hell_ out of Laura seeing as she wasn’t really expecting to be choked during sex. Although she _did_ have one of the best orgasms she had ever had that night and she was sure it wasn’t _just_ a coincidence.  
They never really spoke about the things that got them off seeing as there never seemed to be an appropriate time to actually bring it up, but Laura mentioned the choking directly after they had finished having sex.  
“Maybe next time you wanna warn a gal that you intend on choking her while she’s mid-orgasm.” She had joked.  
Carmilla had growled a laugh, “Sorry, cutie. That was kind of...impromptu. I mean—I have always found it...alluring, I just never tried it before.”  
Laura had raised an eyebrow.

               “Don’t worry cupcake, I know _how_ to do it,” she had placed her thumb and index fingers on either of Laura’s pressure points gently, “Put an ounce of pressure on your carotid artery, and _avoid_ putting pressure on that cute little windpipe of yours.” She didn’t actually squeeze, but instead engaged them in a kiss.  
“But you’re right, I should have asked you first, creampuff. I’m sorry. Won’t happen again.”  
Laura had admitted that she didn’t mind the “impromptu choking” from time to time, and ever since then it was a thing they sort of just adopted.

  
               Right now, the combination of her girlfriend’s fingers roughly sliding in her and her lightheadedness due to the asphyxiation were dramatically increasing her amount of pleasure.  
Their eyes were glued to each other’s, Carmilla’s dominant yet loving and Laura’s helpless but trusting.  
Laura could feel the pressure beginning to well up in her lower abdomen and it was causing her legs to shake in the strong hands of her lover.  
Carmilla curled her fingers and Laura’s torso lifted off of the bed.  
“H-Holy Hufflepuff, Carm!” Laura moaned breathlessly, her eyes rolling in the back of her head.

               Carmilla laughed at her exclamation and let go of her grip around one of the younger girl’s legs.  
“I want you to scream so loud you'll wake the ginger squad.” the vampiric goddess huskily chimed as she re-positioned their bodies.  
Carmilla’s left knee was lightly pressing against the younger girl’s waist and her right knee was planted firmly on the bed, her left arm gripping her girlfriend’s fully extended leg by the ankle.  
Once Laura could feel her girlfriend’s wet folds against her own, she knew what she was trying to do.  
Despite not having any control over her extended leg due to her girlfriend’s rough grasp, Laura began to roll her body, making sure to grind up against her girlfriend’s clit with her own.  
The friction caused both girls to moan and Carmilla had to catch herself from falling with her free hand.  
She continued to furiously grind up into her girlfriend, which only stimulated herself more.  
Laura was whimpering her moans as she continued to exert her energy and strength into getting her girlfriend off.

               “Oh no, creampuff, if I’m going down—you’re coming with me.” Carmilla breathed before roughly grounding into the cupcake.  
They both picked up a fast-paced grinding rhythm, filling their bodies with pleasure from the tips of their spines down to the balls of their feet.  
Laura’s whimpers were getting louder and louder and Carmilla’s moans were following their lead.  
“Carm—I’m...I’m gunna...fuck I’m gunna cum…” Laura moaned, her hand pushing against Carmilla’s ass to increase the pressure.  
She was using every last bit of herself, holding on to the hope that she might be able to make the beautiful girl above her cum before her.

               “C-cum for me, cupcake—oh GOD!” Carmilla’s body tensed as Laura’s grinding rhythm strayed from her own, causing her to put a substantial amount of pressure on the vampire’s clit.  
The vampire released her hold on the smaller girl’s ankle and used both of her hands to keep herself stable on the bed.  
“Laura...Laura...LAURA!” Carmilla’s voice was the one that had spiked a few octaves as the smaller girl frantically grounded against her.  
“Come here, come here!” Laura quickly panted as she lifted her head to connect their lips again.  
She knew she was about two more violent strokes away from losing herself and she wanted the comfort of Carmilla’s lips and soft hands to help keep her grounded...like they always have. And they always would.

               Laura’s entire body began to shake, but to her surprise, Carmilla’s body began to tremble with her.  
The vampire moaned a loud, shrilling moan before releasing herself all over her girlfriend, her legs suddenly failing her and sending her flopping on top of Laura.  
The younger girl went over the edge shortly after that, smiling to herself at the fact that Carmilla came before her.  
But Carmilla could sense her smugness and swiftly inserted one of her fingers into her girlfriend to aid in her orgasm recovery.  
Laura inhaled sharply and attempted to jerk her hips away.  
“Nonono...no more…” she moaned, chuckling softly in her shaking lover’s ear.

               Once the pair had stopped shaking completely, they locked eyes.  
Carmilla rested her forehead against the lighter haired girl’s forehead and smiled weakly before engaging them in a slow, amorous kiss.  
Laura _adored_ Carmilla’s post-orgasm kisses. They were always so full of passion and care and...love.

               In this moment, Laura didn’t care about the pain she had been subjected to due to her lover’s absence.  
She didn’t care about the missing library or the sink holes...she didn’t even care about the school or its students.  
The only thing that mattered to her...the only thing that would _ever matter_ this much...was the beautiful undead love of her life, Carmilla Karnstein.

 

 

**_I love you_ **

 

 

               Laura ran a hand down her sweetheart’s back and Carmilla began to purr.  
If she had any energy left, she would have laughed at her feline reflect.  
Carmilla slid off of Laura and covered their naked bodies with the covers at their feet before wrapping her arms protectively around Laura.  
The younger girl curled into her, pressing her face into the crook of her neck and breathing in the otherworldly beautiful scent radiating off of her skin.  
“Carm…” Laura yawned, slowly losing consciousness.  
Carmilla smiled at the nickname she allowed only Laura to refer to her by before humming, “Yes my love?”  
Despite her exhaustion, the happiness she felt from being referred to as Carmilla’s love overshadowed her.  
_She loved Carmilla more than she knew how to express._ But she knew that Carmilla knew just how much she loved her. After the tension, the fighting, and all of the pain involved, they still managed to end up curled into one another, as in love with each other as they were from the start.

 

               “Are we...gunna be okay?” the thought of them going back to bickering or back to Carmilla disappearing was enough to send another wave of pain through Laura’s chest.  
She hugged her tighter, vowing to herself that she'd never let her go...no matter what happened between them.  
Carmilla was hers.  
And she always would be.

 

               The older girl pressed loving kisses onto the younger girl’s scalp and traced a cool finger up and down her hips.  
Carmilla recognized the change in her lover's breathing pattern.  
Laura had fallen asleep.  
She could cry at that moment, realizing just how in love with the little cupcake she was.  
“I’ll never leave you again, darling. We’re going to be just fine.” she spoke softly although she knew she could have screamed it at the top of her lungs and Laura still wouldn’t have awoken.  
She had learned that the easiest way to put Laura to sleep was to give her an orgasm or two (or three...or five), one of the many things she never minded doing.  
She didn’t mind doing anything to, for, or with Laura. As long as it made her happy, she was happy.

 

               Carmilla pressed a gentle kiss to her human’s shoulder just as the wave of fatigue came crashing down on her.  
Before joining the only light in her life and surrendering to sleep, Carmilla drowsily promised, “We’ll last, cupcake. **_You and I are one forever_ **.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi sorry for the angst and depressing shit don't hate me.  
> It was either this or a sex scene to my Hollstein AU in which Carmilla is an assassin and Laura is the head of the CIA's daughter lol. So i was like I'll be angsty first then throw a random curve-ball with a sex scene to an AU i'm writing.  
> But since I already set that one up, the next chapter will probably be the Hollstein AU sex scene just so ya noo.  
> I've /kinda/ started writing the Unconventional Soulmate AU, so I won't be writing smutty shit ALL the time anymore. And my job wants to kill me so I'm rarely finding time to write as it is.
> 
> If you haven't heard it sometime today, you're beautiful & I hope you have a wonderful day<3


	6. My Starry Eyed, Hands-tied Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "This was wrong.  
> Wanting her, doing what I was doing, feeling the way I was feeling...It was all so wrong and it would only be a matter of time before my father found out…
> 
>    
> But God did she feel so right."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***JUST SO YOU'RE NOT LIKE WTF IS THIS SHIT, READ THIS***
> 
> This is from one of the many AU's I'm writing in which Carmilla is an infamous mercenary/assassin/hitman (whatever you wanna call it) that the police can't seem to track down and Laura is the head of the CIA's daughter.  
> Laura gets a new neighbour in the room directly next to her who after the first week of moving in, already has a bad reputation. Who knew her life would change so drastically after a simple, "I'm Carmilla. I'm your new neighbour, sweetheart."
> 
> NSFW OTP Challenge Day 17 = On the floor
> 
>  
> 
> 1\. [Joy](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9E0w9Myp4U) \- Partynextdoor [mentioned in fic]  
> 2\. [Gangsta](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LAYgZEMMWxo) \- Kehlani  
> 3\. [Gone](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CqHKfscXS64) \- The Weeknd  
> 4.[Novacane](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMfPJT4XjAI) \- Frank Ocean

                  The ceiling fan above our heads that was once turning all too fast for my liking was now inching by ever-so carefully. The black blades were like piercing edges of swords slowly whisking by my line of vision, and the gradually rising smoke was like seemingly impenetrable ghosts that were being brutally separated and ripped to shreds by the menacing blades.

  
                  **_I was high_**.  
Laura Hollis, the entirely too sheltered, naive, goody-two-shoed, daddy’s girl was high _out of her goddamn mind._ __  
_And it felt amazing._ __  
__  
Carmilla Karnstein, rumored sociopathic, drug addicted mercenary—who just so happened to be my next door neighbour—had converted me; shaped me into...into...whatever the hell _this_ was.  
Skipping classes, kissing strangers, staying out late, ingesting types of alcohol that I didn’t even know _existed_...  
and now this: lying in the middle of Carmilla’s living room floor on a Friday night feeling the exaggerated effects that the THC was doing in on me.  
Thinking about how far we’ve come...how far I’ve gone…  
She was my abnormally attractive but highly inconsiderate and disgusting neighbour who had absolutely _no_ boundaries or respect for _my_ personal space, whom I had hated with an intense passion.  
And now…  


_“How ya feeling, buttercup?”_  
Those goddamn eyes that never failed to pierce through my godforsaken soul were watching mine.  
That annoying—but totally attractive—smirk was painted on those perfectly shaped red lips and I wanted nothing more than to wipe the smirk off of those damn lips that I had grown to fall in love with.  
Her words sounded distant but pleasant—like she was my favourite song playing somewhere in the background and all I wanted to do was get there and dance to it, bask in it...claim it as mine .  
Without really registering the movement, I slowly shook my head.  


_“What’s the matter, cutie? Cotton-mouthed already?”_  
Her bone structure was so undeniably perfect and I swear to God the only weapon she needed to murder the troubled souls that she kills was that sharp, salient jawline of hers.  
I couldn’t fight the wave of desire that crept upon me like the night did the day; I wanted to run my fingers down that jawline, then eventually my lips...and maybe I’d lose it and beg the owner of that jawline to make her home in between my legs where I knew she belonged.

  
                  I would never admit this out loud—especially not to Carmilla...as if I need to feed that gigantic ego of hers—but I wanted her. _Bad._ I wanted her everywhere. I wanted her _everything_. I wanted her hands caressing my face one moment, and the next trailing open wounds down my back with her nails. I wanted to wake up to that raspy voice of hers every morning and I wanted to make that same voice go up several octaves when screaming my name every night.  
I wanted her good and her evil. Her all and her nothing. Her heart and her snide.  
_Goddammit I wanted Carmilla Karnstein_.  


                  Whatever song was just on had finished and a new one began.  
It was very slow—or maybe it was only registering as being very slow—and it had like an intimate, vintage bar _je ne sais quoi_ to it.  
The song seemed to heighten my already prevalent high and awakened every part of my body.  
The kicks of the song seemed to gently pick me up off the floor as the repeated lyrics “ _I want to feel Joy, baby_ ” grazed my skin and curled itself around me, threatening to suffocate every last thread of anger and sadness that lingered within my system from the past few days.  
The song's gentle melody coupled with the ghost-like reverb had taken control of my limbs and I was no longer lying down looking at the ceiling.  
I was on top of Carmilla, my hands ghosting over her cheekbones as her eyes watched mine with such an intense mix of passion and lust and care and hurt and…  


_“You understand we can’t be together.”_  
Her words would have stung if the Blue Dream hadn’t numbed me to my fucking core.  
Maybe it did hurt—maybe her words had been the bloody knife I knew she was hiding in this apartment somewhere...maybe she had deliberately brought me here and made me fall for her, so that she could have the upper hand on this entire operation...grab the bull by its horns.  
Maybe these past few months met nothing to her.  
Maybe I meant nothing to her.  
But I didn’t care because in this intimate moment, she meant the world and all of the stars and the galaxies to me.  


                  “I don’t care.”  
My words rang in my own ears. I knew they’d come back to bite me later.  
But that was later. And she was now.  
Suddenly her cold fingertips were brushing against my extremely hot cheeks and her thumb had inched down my lips.  
She began to slowly trail her thumb down my bottom lip, exposing the inside of my lip and a part of my gums.  
Desire attacked me from every angle and I was imagining what her name would taste like escaping my lips in sharp, desperate, lusty whimpers.  


_“God…”_  
Her other hand was now running its course up and down my arm, her fingertips burning every last inch of my skin.  
I used my bottom lip to bring the thumb that was still attached to it up to my mouth, placing a gentle kiss on it before allowing her to slide it into my mouth.  
I was never one for seduction eyes—seeing as I was quite terrible at it—but I couldn’t stop the pool of sexual desire that was making itself prevalent in my eyes of fire.  
Her eyes were watching her thumb in my mouth and she let out a low moan when I gently bit it.  
She was melting in my mouth and the room around us was spinning.  
Or maybe I was the one spinning.  
I was so hopped up on lust and Marijuana and love and—

Love?  
Loving Carmilla Karnstein?  
Did I... _love her_?

 

 _"You know who I am, Laura. You know..._ ** _what_** _I am...what I do. And I know who you are. What you’re to be apart of someday. I—I can’t strip that from you. We would never be able to...I would never be able to give you what you deserve.”_ __  
I shook my head and pinned the hand that had the thumb in my mouth against the furry white carpet under us.  
I didn’t know where this newfound sense of confidence had come from— _I mean yeah it was probably from the drugs_ —but I was loving it.  


My throat and mouth were extremely dry and I could feel every movement my body made; every twitch, every ounce of blood flowing to and from, every cell in my body crying out to touch and be touched by Carmilla...  
  
This was wrong.  
Wanting her, doing what I was doing, feeling the way I was feeling...It was all so wrong and it would only be a matter of time before my father found out…

 

But _God_ did she feel _so right._  


                  “I don’t—want anything else. I want—you.” I hadn’t understood what she was referring to when she had asked if I was cotton-mouthed but I totally understood now since the sensation was making it harder to talk.  
I had a feeling it wasn’t _just_ the drugs making it this difficult to speak, however.  
Her breath caught in her throat at my words and her hands had somehow made it down to my hips.  
I rested my forehead against hers, my light brown hair enclosing her into me.  
Our lips were inches away from each other. I could feel her warm, shaky breath against my bottom lip…  
Or maybe it was _my_ breath that was shaky—I couldn’t necessarily tell.  
Whomever's breath it was—it was driving me insane...  


_“You don’t know what you’re asking for, sweetheart. You don’t understand the lifestyle you’re asking to adopt. What I do...is very dangerous. For both you and I. I couldn’t subject you to that. To me...To what I am.”_  
“...Do you want me?”  
The words had escaped my lips before I even had the time to register what they were.  
Carmilla’s eyes went wide for a minute—she was probably just as shocked at my words as I was—but then that signature smirk of hers presented itself.  
Suddenly, I was no longer on top of her and it was I that was being pinned against the awfully soft carpet now.  
She had placed her thin body in-between my legs and cupped my face in her cold hands.  
Her icy touch was scorching my already warm skin and I could have sworn I was solidifying into her touch.  


                  Instead of answering, she did what I had been wanting her to do for the past several months: she kissed me.  
Her lips slowly but roughly lined my own as her tongue explored my quivering mouth.  
I kissed her back barbarically, desperately, as if she were the only source of water in the drought-stricken desert known as my life.  
Carmilla looked like heaven and tasted like hell—once you get a small taste of her, you’ll go to all lengths and abandon all values and morals you once clung to so fervently just to taste those demonically delectable lips again and again and again.  
I didn’t want this to end. In fact, I wanted—no, I was _desperate_ for more.  


                  It was as if she heard my inner cry, because her lips began to slide down my jaw and then suck roughly on my neck, her hands inching their way down my torso.  
I was squirming with anticipation, the drugs seemingly enhancing the now intense throbbing between my legs.  
_“Cupcake...I wanted you...the moment you came knocking on my door....introducing yourself in that very short..._ **_very_ ** _tight outfit.”_ her voice was heavy and breathy against my neck and I shivered against her lips.  
That had been so long ago—the literal first week she moved in.  
“Before or after you slammed the door in my face?” I managed to laugh sardonically.  
My whole body stiffened once her icy hand began to gently massage my abs. The contrast of her enticing cool hands against my warm body was so wonderful that it was almost painful.  
_I wanted her everywhere._  


                  Carmilla lifted my shirt over my head and tossed it to the side before sliding both of her hands up my arms and past my wrists until our fingers were interlocked.  
My heart was beating so fast that I was a little paranoid it’d rip out of my chest and land in the arms of the only girl I trusted with it.  
Which was _probably_ a mistake…

 

                 The beautiful creature pinning me down with her hips and hands smiled—there were very few moments that she actually _smile smiled_ but when she did, I found myself falling further and further into my infatuation for her.  
Wow, was I _so_ screwed.  
_“What can I say, cutie? I’m kind of shitty with first impressions.”_ she bit her smiling lip as she spoke and began to take off her own shirt.  
It was embarrassing, but seeing that perfectly structured pale body and those— _God her breasts were amazing_ —I just lost control of what small piece of my body I had left.  
I gasped at the beautiful victorian statue on top of me and lifted my hands to reach out and touch her. I always had trouble with keeping my hands off of exquisite works of art.  
_“Na uh uh…”_ Carmilla grabbed a hold of both of my wrists in one swift movement and laid them back above my head, _“No touching, sweetheart.”_

 

                  I whined and she responded by vigorously sliding her hands up my stomach and under the cups of my bra to roughly squeeze my breasts.  
I let out a very loud and very shaky breath as she began to fondle my breasts with her hands and lap over my nipples with her fingers.  
Without any forewarning, the pale goddess pinched both of my nipples and I let out a low moan, my back arching.  
I could feel how wet my underwear was and It was driving me insane—I didn’t think I’d last if she kept teasing me like this.  
Carmilla eventually tossed my bra to the side and made her way down to my jeans, taking her sweet time unbuttoning them.  
“Carm—please...just...do me already….” I could barely see her behind all the lust in my eyes.  
She chuckled, _“Eager, are we?”_

 

                  Very. I mean...I only waited several months for this…  
Carmilla continued with her slow-paced torture, but before she got my pants below my waist, she roughly grinded her fingers against my clit.  
My entire body jumped and I let out a squeaky moan.  
The pleasure went away just as quickly as it had came, and I couldn’t wait anymore.  
I quickly brought my underwear and jeans down to my ankles and slid my own hand through my folds, lifting gently into my own strokes.  
But my impatience had angered the vampire on top of me.

 

                  In the literal blink of an eye, Carmilla had disappeared, reappeared, and cuffed one of my hands to the thick leg of her sofa.  
I was so taken aback—I mean...should I have expected an infamous mercenary to own a pair of handcuffs?  
Had this been a few days earlier I probably would have been scared shitless.  
But with Carmilla now…now I was more turned on than anything.

  
                  _“Well since you refuse to stay still, guess I’m going to have to tie you down, creampuff.”_ she was grinning maliciously, a thick white rope hanging from her right hand. __  
I exhaled noisily once she straddled my waist once again.  
Everything in my head screamed RUN, GET OUT, CALL FOR HELP...but my heart and Carmilla’s surprisingly gentle hands were reassuring, “It’ll be fine. Everything is okay.”  
...coupled with the mere fact that at this point, it was entirely impossible for me to run.

  
                  I swallowed my fear the minute she tied the constricting rope around my right wrist and then to the thick metal leg of the chaise directly next to the sofa.  
“Comfortable?” she whispered as she lightly ran her fingers down my extended, bounded arms.  
My breathing was ragged and my body was tense, but I nodded anyway.  
I trusted Carmilla.

 

 _“Excellent.”_ she happily breathed, her hands trailing down my body yet again.  
She spread my legs apart gently, kissing her way up my left calf to my inner thigh and then repeated the same action on my right leg.  
“Y-you’re—pretty big on...foreplay, huh?” I stammered, the anticipation welling in the most painful of ways.  
I could feel her grin against my inner thigh.  
_“I like to play with my food before I have the pleasure of devouring it. Especially when dinner is as...ravishing as it is tonight.”_ _  
_ I was about to say something snarky about being compared to a four-course meal, but the thought dissipated from my inner conscious the second Carmilla’s tongue flattened against my length.

 

                  My whole body reacted to the sudden, overwhelming amount of pleasure that her tongue was bringing it: my legs bucked, my toes curled, and I let out a moan that sounded more like a whimper.  
I lifted my arms, the sudden urge to grab a hold of her hair taking over, and was thoroughly disappointed when they were yanked back by the rope and handcuffs.  
Her eyes flashed in my direction, those perfectly shaped eyebrows raised while her tongue began to pick up a faster beat.  
I so desperately wanted to grab that smug face and drown it in kisses, or slide my hands through that jet black hair.  
My hands tightened into fists in frustration.

 

                  Carmilla replaced her tongue with two of a fingers instantly, slowly pressing them into me.  
“Oh...God!” I moaned while throwing my head back.  
Her lips formed into yet another devious smile at my reaction and she attached her lips to my clit.  
My hips jerked and I couldn’t help myself, I began to grind myself against her lips.  
Thankfully she didn’t reject my action, rather she welcomed it by following my thrusting pattern with her tongue.  
She began to thrust a bit more aggressively into me, curling her fingers every so often.  
My toes were curling and the pleasure ran up my spine in sharp spikes which then translated to shrilling moans leaving my mouth.  


                  Admittedly, I had thought about having sex with Carmilla before and I imagined it to be a rough, wall-scratching, sheet-biting display of ecstasy. Although I definitely wouldn’t put that past her—this _is_ our first time and she already busted out the tools for bondage—I didn’t have a problem with this calmer, equally as sexy display of intimacy.  
I was almost 110% sure there would more...sexual encounters with her.  
Probably more than I’d ever be comfortable with admitting to others.  


_“You’ve wanted this for quite some time now, haven’t you Laura? All those nights you spent listening to me touch myself...touch other girls...you wanted it to be you that I was fucking, didn’t you?”_ Carmilla chided, her voice low and seductive.  
She used the hand that wasn’t plowing into me to quickly rub against my clit.  
“Carm!” I moaned, my body twisting but then being yanked right back to it’s original position.  
Damn these handcuffs.  
_“Answer the question.”_ she demanded, quickly adding another finger into me.  
The sexual ecstasy coursing through my body was making it extremely difficult to talk, let alone focus on her words.  
“Y-yes...oh, fucking—hell…” She curled her fingers inside of me and my eyes rolled back into my head. I was seeing stars. I was so close.  


_“You’ve touched yourself to thoughts of me fucking you like the dirty girl you really are, haven’t you?”_  
Everything around me was getting fuzzy and my body was thrashing about violently.  
The handcuffs were cutting into my skin with every one of my powerful jerks stinging with pain but being assuaged with the pleasure of Carmilla’s magical fingers.  
“Yes—yes, GOD yes…” I bit my quivering lip, attempting to keep myself from drooling.  
Carmilla flicked her wrist and— my God she found the spot .  
“AH...R-right there! OhmyGoddon’tfuckingstop!” the words were sticking together and I swear to God I could see Canis major clear as ever.  
My arms were thrashing, completely out of my control.  


_“Tell me what you want, Laura.”_ her voice was shaking and it surprised me seeing as she didn’t even _need_ to breath.  
She slowed down her hectic rubs against my clit and my body shivered from the loss of friction.  
“I—I w-want…” I was forgetting how to speak, my mind clouded from the drugs and the intensity of my arousal. “I...cum—fuckCarmpleaseIwannacum”  
Her pumping slowed, _“What was that, sweetheart?”_  
My body literally was _aching_ , _begging_ for an orgasm...and so was I.  
I looked down at her and tried to reach out to her again—which of course failed and only resulted in the handcuffs cutting deeper into me.  
“Carm! Carm please fuck me—letmefuckingcum _God_ I need it!” She had already built up so much momentum...I was _right_ there.  
Carmilla’s eyes had changed. They were as black as her hair and they were looking at my wrist like I really was a four-course meal.

 

                  I followed her gaze and noticed that there was a small amount of blood coming from the area that the handcuffs had pressed so violently down into.  
_Oh shit._  
Her hands had ceased all movement at this point and she was just glaring at my wrist.  
She bit her lip and I saw those two insanely sharp teeth scrape into her own soft lips.  
“C-Carm…?” I was still _insanely_ turned on but now I was also slightly scared.  
But my sexual desire seemed to absorb my fear, increasing just how turned on I was instead of hindering it.  
I began to imagine what it would feel like for her to bite me as I went tumbling over the edge. Assuming she didn’t kill me, I believed it would possibly heighten my already incredibly intense arousal.  


                  Carmilla shut her eyes before growling, _“Goddammit...Laura I—You have to go.”_  
She removed her fingers from out of me and stood to her feet.  
“NO! ...uh—I mean...Carm it’s okay! You’re a vampire—I get it. You need blood. Drink from me. Drink from me and _goddammit finish me off_ !” I was so desperate for her that I didn’t even care that she was a supernatural, cold blooded killing machine that _could_ potentially drain me dry.  
I just wanted her against me, inside of me.  
_I just wanted_ **_her_ ** .  
And right now she was glaring at me, shock and confusion burned into those two dark holes.  
“I’m—I’m not afraid...You’re hungry. Feed from me.” I said as confidently as I possibly could.  
She remained unmoved.  
I wanted her to be comfortable sharing who she was with me—even if it meant her digging her teeth into my neck.

 

                  “I trust you.” I looked at her sincerely and bit my lip, the throbbing between my legs torturing me.  
I don’t know what it was that I saw, but _something_ in those eyes changed.  
The eyes that looked at me like I was some type of hors d'oeuvres were now gazing upon me softly...lovingly.  
It was enough to make my heart melt.  


                  Carmilla got back down on her knees and brought our lips together.  
I could taste the desire and feel her exerted passion. It felt like our lips belonged together…  
Like _we_ belonged together.  


                  Carmilla palmed my clit and slowly slid her fingers back inside of me, causing me to moan softly into her mouth.  
She was pumping into me slowly, trying to rebuild the tension that she allowed to let fall.  
_“Forewarning, creampuff, it’s going to hurt. You might want to...hold onto me.”_ her voice was soft, a great contrast to how it had been a mere five minutes ago.  
She, with ease, broke the metal handcuffs with one of her hands and lifted my bleeding hand up to our lips.  
Her eyes strained, like it physically hurt her to have my bleeding hand this close to her, but regardless, she pressed gentle kisses all over my bleeding wrist.  
It would have been sweet if I didn’t see the amount of restraint she had to put on herself and how much it seemed to be hurting her.

I guess it was sweet—in a sadistic type of way  


                  Her fingers picked up that same fast paced, aggressive pattern from earlier, and my toes began to curl.  
I was getting closer to my climax a lot faster this time around.  
“Carm…” I breathed her name, my eyes failing to stay locked to her black ones.  
_“If you start feeling uncomfortable or...lightheaded, let me know, sweetheart.”_ her voice was still very soft and loving; it was pulling at my heart strings.  
She found the spot again and pressed into me a bit more roughly, causing my torso to lift off of the floor before being yanked back down by my still constrained arm.  


                  “OhmyGodCarmrightthere...don’t stop—fuck, don’t stop!” I shrilled, closing my eyes so tightly that I was starting to see white.  
_“Wouldn’t dream of it, darling_ . _”_ She cooed in my ear before pressing gentle kisses to my pulse point.  
My stomach filled with butterflies at her referring to me as ‘darling’ and it only seemed to add to my arousal.  
Her fingers continued to quickly pump into me and I could feel my walls tightening.  
She curled her fingers inside of me and that was it, I was seeing stars.  
“CAR—MILLA!” I screamed her name just as I felt a sharp sting in my neck.  


                  My God was she right, it _hurt like hell_ .  
But coupled with my arousal and my high, I felt like I was transcending into another universe.  
_Everything felt so good._  
Her tongue was lapsing over the same two holes she was sucking me from, assuaging the pain while simultaneously being the source of said pain.  
My body was trembling as I released myself all over her hands and carpet (which I was definitely going to have to clean later).  
I hadn’t noticed, but I was pressing her body tightly against mine with my free arm, my hand firmly gripping her raven coloured hair.  
The pain was wonderful but simultaneously unbearable—I wanted her to both stop and continue on forever.  
“Carm…” I hummed her name, my eyelids no longer able to open.  
I was drained—pun intended—having two types of liquids coaxed out of you really was draining.  


                  “Carm…” I said her name again not really knowing why.  
I guess I just enjoyed the way her name felt inside of my mouth.  
A gigantic wave of fatigue ran over me and I wanted nothing more but to go to sleep.  
Almost simultaneous with the wave, Carmilla unhitched herself from my neck and licked at the two holes she had made.  
“Laura? Laura are you alright?” Her voice that once sounded so distant, was now at such a comforting close proximity. But her tone was frantic and much too loud for my liking.  
I attempted to nod, but the sharp pain in my neck stopped me, causing me to groan instead.  
“Baby are you okay? You need food...and some fluids—Let me get you something to drink…”  
“No...I’m fine—Don’t leave…” I mumbled, attempting to stretch out the arm that was constrained.  
It flopped back down onto the floor with a soft thud and Carmilla was quick to untie it.  
All the while my stomach was doing somersaults at the newly acquired nickname of ‘baby’.  
_Goddammit...I_ **_had_ ** _fallen in love._

 

                  “I’m not going anywhere, cupcake. I’m here.”  
I was being lifted and carried somewhere, but it felt more like I was being whisked away by a cloud.  
Gentle kisses were being pressed against my scalp and I was melting into them.  
_This_ was heaven.

 

                  “How are you feeling, cutie? I’m sorry I—I got a little carried away. Your blood is like—ambrosia...I’ve never had anything like it.”  
She placed me on top of something soft...I’m assuming her bed...and covered me up with something warm and silky.  
I could feel myself losing consciousness, but I wanted her near me. I wanted her close.  
My eyes opened to her beautifully structured face above me and I smiled weakly, “Come here.”  
She smiled back and obeyed, sliding into the covers with me and wrapping her strong arms around me.  
I curled into her, loving the way she felt and how beautiful she smelled.  
I honestly could have died in that moment and wouldn’t have minded—I was already in heaven wrapped up in the only girl I was capable of ever loving.

 

                  A gentle hand began to smooth down my hair and a cool pair of lips was gingerly peppering kisses on my head and cheek.  
It was all much too soothing, and I was ready to deliver myself to the land of sleep.  
“Carm…” I hummed her name one last time, “I love you.”  


                  I had fallen asleep right after that, but I could have sworn I heard her whisper faintly,  
“I love you so much more. And that’s the problem.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi  
> So I GOT MY COMPUTER BACK FROM GEEK SQUAD :D  
> I think I'm going to focus on writing my AU's a lot more than these now, but I'll still try to update this frequently.
> 
> Thank you to all of the people who continue to comment on my fics and give kudos like it may not seem like much, but it honestly means the WORLD ["and all the galaxies" :p] to me. I appreciate and love you all.
> 
> By the way, you're beautiful & thank you for reading :)  
> [<3](http://brokebackbianca.tumblr.com/ask)


	7. I Wish I Could Paint Our Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura wants to get back to sleep, but Carmilla has other plans...  
> Fluff & smut

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW Challenge Day 18 = Morning Lazy Sex  
> This one is really short...a gigantic, much needed contrast to the other ones in this series.  
> Hope you like it nonetheless!
> 
> 1\. [Good Morning](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D1Zl3BbLCY) \- John Legend  
> 2.[No Diggity](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HIfFA8-RaHQ) \- Chet Faker  
> 3.[Coffee](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Z55sZ2oVY4) \- Miguel [Chapter name insp.]  
> 4\. [Take Me Somewhere Nice](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHO6pbjQ9ec) \- Mogwai

**“Good morning, cutie.”**

 

  
           She heard the raspy sleepy voice of her raven haired lover, but she was still _so_ tired that she couldn’t even reply.  
Her drowsiness made everything feel like a dream...Carmilla’s sexy sleepy voice, the warm covers being pushed off of her, Carmilla’s strong arms….her warm hands….uh—her  warm _wandering_ hands…  

 

  
           Laura shifted away from her girlfriend’s grasp and groaned a, “Caarm.”  
The vampire rested her face in the crook of Laura’s neck and chuckled lowly in her ear, sending a warm chill through her girlfriend’s spine.  
Carmilla’s left hand ran up and down her lover’s naked body gently, occasionally making it’s way down to her inner thigh to tease her.

 

           After last night, Laura didn’t know if she had any energy left in her to fall victim to her girlfriend’s _magical_ fingers again.  
Laura figured she should have known _something_ was up the minute Carmilla _asked_ if the two could just stay in and watch _Dr. Who_ . But she was just so blinded by the happiness and shock brought forth by the fact that her pop-culture hating girlfriend was _actually_ indulging her in her absolute favourite show that any thoughts of foul-play didn’t even come to mind.

 

           Laura even started _re_ -re-watching season 1 _just_ for the vampire.  
They’d gotten about fifteen minutes into the first episode before Carmilla’s cold hands began to wander.  
Needless to say, their Dr. Who and chill night consisted of a _whole lot_ of the latter and not nearly enough of the former.

 

           Carmilla’s lips were pressing lazy, slobbery kisses against her back as her hand continued it’s pathway up her body.  
Laura tried to shut her girlfriend out as much as she could, hoping that it was one of those “if I ignore it, it’ll go away” moments, but her girlfriend continued anyway. If anything, her idleness did more coaxing than repressing.  
“Carm I’m _tired_ .” Laura whined, eyes still closed.  
She wanted to go to sleep, but the more Carmilla touched her, the more her body rejected the idea of sleep.  
“What? I’m just appreciating the gorgeous human I get the pleasure of waking up next to every morning. Don’t worry about me.” she cooed in Laura’s ear, lifting off of the pillow to place a gentle kiss to her lover’s head.

 

 

            “Mhmm, _sure_ . Just like you were _oh so excited_ to watch Dr. Who last night?” Laura  grumbled playfully.  
Carmilla yawned, her warm breath softly tickling the back of her girlfriend’s neck.  
“Hey I sat through fifteen minutes of that nonsense...where’s my credit?” she joked as she began to massage Laura’s hips and left buttcheek with the hand already grazing her.  
She rolled her eyes and rotated her body over to face her girlfriend before locking their lips together.  
The kiss was slow and lazy, but it made Laura’s heart skip a beat nonetheless.  
Carmilla brought her hands up to her young lover’s face and attempted to deepen the kiss by licking her bottom lip.  
Laura had learned it was her girlfriend’s “chivalrous” way of asking for permission to shove her tongue down her throat.

But Laura knew once that happened, there was absolutely no way the two lovebirds wouldn’t _not_ have sex...something Laura didn’t believe she had the energy for (even if her faintly throbbing centre disagreed with her).

 

 

           Laura broke the kiss before breathlessly responding, “Go back to sleep you horndog.”  
She smiled vibrantly and pressed a quick kiss to the side of Carmilla’s mouth before facing her back to her again.  
Carmilla wrapped her arms around Laura and buried her face in her neck.  
She always needed to be touching Laura in some way. Whether it be while they were lying in bed, or if they out in public simply walking to class or going to get something to eat—she just _always_ needed to touch her.  
She also required _so much_ attention...like a child...or a pet.  
But of course, Laura never minded it.  
In fact, she found herself always _wanting_ to give the vampire the attention she so desperately desired.

Laura was too in love with her to _not_ comply.

 

 

           Carmilla was silent for a moment and Laura wondered if she had _actually_ gotten her to go to sleep.  
_Huh. That’s a first_ .  
Eventually Laura shut her eyes and attempted to lull herself back to sleep by backing into her girlfriend’s warm, protective grasp.  
Almost as if on cue, Carmilla began to lovingly stroke her hair back, her normal routine whenever Laura was attempting to fall asleep. She knew it soothed her.

 

 

           This warm, tingly feeling ran through the cupcake with every brush of her fingertips against her scalp and Laura felt like she was melting into the doting hands of the love of her life.  
Normally, it would've been enough to send her back into the land of unconsciousness.  
But now Laura was the one that couldn’t get back to sleep.  
Carmilla’s wandering hands felt like they were still ghosting her skin, rubbing her in _all_ the right places.  
She kind of... _wanted_ them to return to their original action of groping her body.  
Just the thought of her lover’s hands caressing her was causing her to remember last night—and she was remembering it _very_ vividly.  
Carmilla’s fingers here, her own fingers there...and the way she did that one thing with her tongue…

 

           “Someone isn’t sleeping.” The monochrome-clad beauty’s voice was still very low and sleepy, but to Laura it just sounded seductive as hell.  
Laura tried to pretend she was sleeping, completely forgetting that her girlfriend could hear her heart beat skyrocketing and… _I hope she can’t..._ **_smell_ ** _me._  
“Mmmm...is that my favourite scent that’s tickling my nose? I think that means someone’s wet.” she growled in her ear, gently nipping at her earlobe.  
_Scratch that—she can_ **_definitely_ ** _smell me._

 

           Despite the fact that she was fully aware that Carmilla knew she was wide awake, she continued to ignore her and fake sleep.  
“What were you thinking about? Was it last night when I bent you over the coffee table and fucked you nice and hard while you screamed my name, begging me to go deeper? ...or maybe it was when I curled my fingers in you while simultaneously massaging your waist? I know you _love_ when I do that. You come apart _so_ easily...” Her voice was like ice in the younger girl’s ear and her hand was slowly trailing down her arm and to her abs.  
Laura bit her lip while imagining Carmilla’s words.  
She was replaying the scenes in her head, hearing her own moans and Carmilla’s grunts...that unforgettable slapping sound of their skin repeatedly coming together...the feel of Carmilla _inside_ of her…

 

           "Or maybe it was the way I flicked my tongue against your clit. You were moaning _so_ loud—saying so many naughty things...I’m sure Perry could hear you from all the way down the hall. Ooh, or maybe you were imagining the way I spread that pretty little pussy wide open for me with my fingers... _God_ you came _all over me_ , cupcake. Mmm, what I would give to make you cum right now. I could just eat...you...alive…”  
And just like that, Carmilla’s hands rubbed against her lover’s folds, causing Laura to let out a breathy moan and throw her head back against her.  
She couldn’t hold it anymore.  
She wanted Carmilla to fuck her senseless.

   
  
           Laura rolled her hips, attempting to grind herself against the vampire’s sluggish fingers. Carmilla laughed against her neck.  
“ _There’s_ my Laura.” she pressed a weak kiss against her lover’s throat.  
Laura reached a hand behind her and wrapped a hand around the back of Carmilla’s neck to keep herself steady as Carmilla rubbed against her, her hips thrashing every which direction.  
“F-fu…ohmy…” Laura couldn’t even complete a full sentence.  
The wave of pleasure was attacking her, causing her toes to curl and her eyes to roll to the back of her head.  
Carmilla’s free hand began to scale her lover’s body gently before reaching one of her breasts and squeezing it roughly.  
“ _God Carm...!_ D—don’t _stop_ …!”

 

 

           The vampire surprised her girlfriend by quickly inserting her middle finger into her and pumping slowly yet aggressively.  
“ah...I...Oh— _Carm_ …!” Laura was certain she was going to cum soon. The pressure had welled in her abdomen and she didn’t think she could hold anymore.  
All the while Carmilla was consistently grinding herself into Laura’s ass, her own arousal making itself very present.  
“Come on my darling. I can feel you tightening. Come for me, my love.” Carmilla lovingly cooed as she pressed kisses under her ear.  
It was very rare for Carmilla to say loving things mid-sex—Laura had learned that talking dirty turned Carmilla on...and it _certainly_ made her all hot-and-bothered as well—so her loving, gentle words came as a very unexpected but very beautiful surprise.  
It made her feel all warm and fuzzy, which was adding to her arousal.  
She made a mental note to have sex with a sleepy Carmilla more often.

 

 

           Laura moaned loudly when Carmilla added another finger and her whole body tensed.  
She forced her feet in-between the vampire’s, hoping that Carmilla’s warm legs would somewhat help soothe the shaking she knew she was about to undergo.  
Carmilla, knowing her lover’s body language as well as she knew the Sumerian alphabet, used her other hand that was playing with the younger girl’s nipples to roughly grind her fingers against the lower part of her waist—Laura’s favourite spot.  
Laura inhaled sharply and dug her nails into the back of her girlfriend’s neck.

 

           “C-CARMILLA!”  
Laura’s body was trembling like crazy as she began to go over the edge. She was closing her eyes so tightly that she began to see stars, and the vampire’s still quickly moving fingers were making it hard for her to focus on anything but those brightly coloured stars.  
Laura was whimpering, still shaking as she released herself.  
Carmilla began to pepper kisses up her collarbone and neck until she reached her lover’s quivering lips.  
The kiss was intense and slow, and _this time_ Laura allowed her vampiric beauty’s tongue to collide with her own.

 

           Carmilla continued to rub her fingers against her girlfriend until Laura stopped shaking and jerked her hips away from her hands, all too sensitive for her brutal strokes.  
Laura broke the kiss to catch her breath and refocus her eyes so that she could stop seeing blotches of black and blue whenever she reopened them.  
She came _so hard,_ but she didn’t even realize how it was possible for her to even _cum_ after last night.

 

           Laura turned to finally face her girlfriend and managed to say in-between heavy breaths, “You suck.”  
Carmilla licked her girlfriend off of her fingers before weakly grinning, “Vampiric constitution kind of authenticates that, cutie.”  
If she had any energy left, she would have rolled her eyes. Instead, she shut them and curled into Carmilla.  
The vampire wrapped her arms around her and pressed gentle kisses to her temple.

 

           “You've made quite a mess down there.” she noted, yawning.  
Laura yawned too as she responded, “I think my lower body is numb.”  
Carmilla chuckled, “I wouldn’t be surprised with how hard you came down.”  
Laura pressed light kisses against the vampire’s collarbone before replying, “Do you know how many times I came in the past twelve hours? Probably an unhealthy, lower body-numbing amount.”  
The vampire smiled against her lover’s hair, “I lost count after five.” and then slid a hand down to her inner thigh to collect a substantial amount of her cum to bring up to her own mouth.

“Gross, Carm stop.” Laura laughed, reopening her eyes at the feel of her finger against her.  
“You don’t know what you’re talking about, sweetheart. I’d take you over a _Croquembouche_ any day.” Carmilla smiled while licking the remainder of her girlfriend off of her.  
Laura smiled and yawned once more before adjusting herself so that she was lying on top of Carmilla.

 

           The vampire went right into her routine of lulling Laura to sleep by gently combing her hair back and pressing her lips to the top of her head.  
Laura couldn’t help but imagine what her and her girlfriend’s life would be like five, six, even ten years from now. Away from Silas, away from her mother, away from anglerfish demi-gods...away from everything that was a distraction to their love.  
Although she never allowed herself to think of saving lives as a _distraction_ —this morning she did.  
She wanted nothing more than to indulge in her lover’s fantasy of running away together, sleeping in hotels, never staying in one country for too long…  
Just Carmilla and Laura in love.  
In love and alone.

 

           Maybe one day they’d get that storybook romance and travel the world together.  
Eventually settle somewhere...(preferably in the United States, but she knew her girlfriend was nostalgic and wanted to “remain in Europe for as long as this old soul still kicks”) maybe adopt a dog—if Carmilla and her feline configuration agreed—have a baby...grow old together…  
Or maybe Carmilla would give in to her pleas and change Laura so that they, like their love, could shine forever.  
Only time would tell.  
Regardless, Laura was eager for their future...for the ways in which their love would falter, and then manifest from said bumps in the road that _is_ their love life...their lives _together_.

 

           She was eager to continue living this life where she could love Carmilla freely for as long as they both lived.  
            ** _She was eager to continue loving Carmilla._**

 

           Unfortunately this time around, the rush of fatigue hit Laura like a train and she could feel herself drifting off into probably the deepest, most peaceful sleep she’d get for a very long time. And she didn’t try to fight it.  
Laura fell asleep while listening to the soft pattern of her undead lover’s breathing, all the while dreaming up a world where her and Carmilla could be alone together...as in love as ever.

“But to die as lovers may—to die together,” Carmilla whispered before she followed her lover’s footsteps and gave herself over to the weight of her own exhaustion,

  
“...so that they may live together. Forever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have nothing to say other than you are beautiful, I hope your day/night is going SPLENDID, and thank you for reading, thank you for the comments, and thank you for the Kudos. You're all lovely.


	8. Revive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Is Miss entirely-too-tightly-wound suggesting that we engage in the ancient tradition of mending relationships through a steamy dose of make up sex?” I rose my eyebrows and rested our foreheads together.  
> She was grinning, her gaze flickering between my lips and my eyes.  
> “Hey, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with some— physical reassurance .” Laura mused.  
> I chuckled briefly before teasing, “Physical reassurance, huh? Well in that case...” I pressed a long peck onto her plump lips before gutturally smirking, “Let me reassure my everlasting bond to you with some amazing , supernaturally exhilarating make up sex, darling.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW OTP Challenge Day 27 = Rough, biting, scratch  
> This is for GABI (Sorry it's not the Lodge one :p)  
> *****This is also apart of the "Carmilla Appreciation Week" thing Day 1: Favourite season.  
> I based this being in Season 3 like... the middle of the beginning kind of. So yeah. Enjoy the fluff and smut.
> 
> 1\. [Medicine](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aM2lObw1CbY) \- Daughter  
> 2.[Girlfriend](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8JEwNiPlAo&index=1033&list=LLK8KAsYUSRwqUL5pNGSYiWg) \- We Are Trees  
> 3\. [Cinemas for Marsielle](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8aUPH3odcA4) \- Arms and Sleepers  
> 4.[Woman](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnaUgSQh0BU) \- HONNE  
> 5\. [All the way Down](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NzjrX4SGd7s) \- Kelela  
> 6\. [I've Been Hearing That You're Freaky](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6DMPYZ5TTXw) \- Jonny Craig  
> 7\. [...goingtohell](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDyd_U40Lp8) \- Miguel  
> 8\. [Posion](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giNRG6ttw80) \- Brent Faiyaz  
> 9\. [Beautiful Love](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vX9h4PPx41I) \- The Afters  
> 10.[I Can Almost See You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-ayuRE5xd8&list=LLK8KAsYUSRwqUL5pNGSYiWg&index=1675) \- Hammock (if the song list is too long I definitely recommend listening to this one when you start getting towards the end of the fic)

**“In a room full of people, you’re the only one I see.”** **  
****“In a museum enamored with beautiful, precious works of art, I find myself being able to stare only at you.”** **  
****“My skin has been touched by hundreds of hands over the centuries, but your fingerprints are the only ones I’ve ever found to have left stains.”**  
  **  
** It was all so cliche; the string of metaphors I’ve put together in my many attempts to epitomize just how passionate my infatuation for her truly was.  
And I know I could form a habit of verbally expressing my love in the most pragmatic of ways—”You’re the only one I want”, ”You’re so beautiful”, “I will never leave you”—and my wide-eyed maiden fair’s cheeks would still paint themselves that lovely crimson that I’m stark-raving mad for, and the steady pulsation of her gigantic heart would still beat to the tune of a faster song all the same.

 

But I was a philosopher blessed with the curse of overpowering romantic intellectual capabilities.  
Practical would always be inefficient, especially when it came to Laura.  
Laura Hollis deserved her own artisan; a skillful exhibitionist who would go to great lengths and exert their creativity to honor and illuminate her inner and outer beauty.  
Although I was the furthest thing from Jane Austen when it came to manifesting ‘love’ on paper, and nowhere remotely close to embodying extraordinary adoration as Rembrandt was on canvas, I still tried. And I tried for her because she was the only one that I have found in over a century that was really worth trying for.

 

I was currently stretched out across the cushioned brown chair adjacent to the wooden round table in the library with my instruments for ‘trying’: a spotty inked pen and my worn brown notebook in which I wrote metaphors, words of praise, and little things I noticed that made her tick.  
She didn’t know about it—no one did.  
My “possessive, romantic vampire crap” already made her cringe (sometimes playfully, sometimes not so playfully) and if she were to discover that I have an entire notebook of cheesy one-liners and things about her that I loved, she’d probably run for the hills.  
Plus, I didn’t need my glimmering image of being callous and indifferent to be dismantled, so the notebook was one of my best kept secrets that I hid in the open.

 

Laura was curled up in about four blankets on top of one of the two blow-up mattresses Ginger-dork found on their library scavenger hunt (what mother kept these blow-up mattresses down here for I have no clue nor did I ever wish to find out) watching Gilmore girls on her laptop.

 

I was worried.  
She was... _different_ .  
Less energetic and hopeful.  
Less “people are in trouble and we need to help them” and more “RORY _NEEDS_ TO BE WITH PARIS. NO, I’M NOT USING GILMORE GIRLS AS A SMOKESCREEN TO INTERNALIZE ANGUISH! THEY’RE LESBIANS, HAROLD! ”

She’s hurting.  
It’s prevalent everytime I look into those beautiful brown eyes.  
And I’m a great deal of the cause.  
Hell, I am the _literal_ cause.  
If I didn’t want her so selfishly...if she were never mine and just another unfortunate student of this shitty university, that luminous, go-getter brightness would still burn with the intensity of a trillion stars behind those entrancing eyes.

The damage has already been done.  
I can’t undo what has already been written in ink...but I would do so a thousand times over—erase my existence from her life no matter how much it’d utterly _destroy_ me—just so her light would never dim.  
So she’d never burn out.

 

I hadn’t noticed that my eyes were glued to her, but she had.  
She turned away from her screen to catch eyes with me, the pain in them as evident as the hair on her head.  
I quickly returned my gaze back to my notebook and began to scrawl something down onto the worn brown pages.  
**“I’m a selfish, cold-blooded, merciless creature of habit. I have spent the past 3 centuries searching for ways to inhibit my own happiness. Due to my egocentrism, constantly achieving some sense of joviality has been my end goal—the only thing I have ever cared about.”** **  
** “Hey...Carm?”  
My head rose a bit quicker than I would have liked it to.

 

We hadn’t spoken today.  
The majority of our time down here in this stuffy library has been like this; every other day we’ll speak in brevity about some type of mishap or theory about what’s actually going on in the life we’ve abandoned upstairs (the conversations usually either have something to do with the ginger rocket scientist or we’re having them _with_ them), occasionally I’ll complain about her obsessive compulsive binge watching of Gilmore girls, she’ll complain about my lack of empathy (she swears she means in regards to the show, but _i know_ what she’s really meaning to convey), we’ll undergo a display of sometimes harmless and playful (although most of the time not) bickering and bantering, and then the next day we won’t speak at all.  
It’s those days that I can’t stand the most.

At least when we’re arguing, she’s looking at me, speaking to me...acknowledging my existence.  
On the days where radio silence ensues betwixt us, we never catch eyes, we never brush shoulders.  
We don’t so much as exist to one another.  
And I know I said I’d be willing to start over and erase myself and the catastrophic damage that I always bring forth wherever it is I seem to go, but not like this.  
Not while I know there are so many things that have gone left unsaid that are bothering the both of us. Not while those eyes still call to me whenever it is I leave to salvage any type of food i can find, telling me to be safe and _begging_ me to come back home to her.  
_Not while we’re still helplessly in love_.

 

  She hasn’t said anything, we’re just locking eyes as her television show murmurs silently in the background.  
She looks unsure of what to say, or unsure if what she would like to say is even worth saying.  
I don’t coax her, although any other normal day I would have.  
We’ve been through so much.  
_She’s_ been through so much.  
I don’t want her to lose anymore of herself than she already has.  
She may not necessarily be mine right now, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t want her to be any less of herself.

 

Her mouth opened for a second before shutting shortly after.  
“What time is it?”  
I couldn’t help but smirk at her _ever-so-slick_ topic divergent.  
“Well I dunno, creampuff. You’re the one with the laptop out.” I responded, smirking still.  
She pursed her lips and turned back to her laptop to check the time.  
“Right...Well...Uh—In case you were _also_ wondering, it is 12:33am.” she stammered, locking eyes with me yet again.  
I nodded. “Thanks for the update.”  
She turned back to her laptop and responded silently, “You’reee welcome.”

 

Silence.  
I know she wanted to say _something_ .  
I promised myself I would ex-nay on the coaxing-ay, but all of this silence and anticipation was maddening. I needed to know.  
I sat up straight in the chair, crossed my leg on top of the other one and watched Laura as she watched her screen.  
_God,_ Laura Hollis _still_ remained the most beautiful creature I have ever had the pleasure of placing my eyes upon. _  
  
_

I bit my lip, the suspense welling in the pit of my stomach in the worst way.  
“Humor me, cupcake, will ya?”  
She inched her head back in my direction, her eyes adjusting to my new position.  
“What was it that you _really_ wanted to say?” I spoke low, just in case ginger Holtzmann in the other room had woken up (yes, I _may have_ watched GhostBusters with the two when they somehow found a way to stream it online for free).  
Laura shifted in her blankets, unwrapping one of them from around her head before looking at me yet again with those chocolate eyes.  
She was silent for a while, biting her lip (which I found entirely too sexy for a time like this one. I blame my lack of blood consumption) and watching me, contemplating on if she should say the words that were on the tip of her tongue.

If she didn’t want to speak about it, I wasn’t going to force her.

I focused my attention back to my notepad and continued writing.  
**“In all my years of living to retain any and all types of self-inflicted felicities, I have only ever found one individual worth sacrificing my own happiness for so that theirs could be planted and nourished, so that it may one day flourish.”** **  
** “Can you—do me a favour…?”  
My eyes never left my notebook and I continued writing as I hummed, “What is it?”  
**“There is only one individual that, in over a century, I have found worth saving. Worth sacrificing myself for.”** **  
** Line skip.  
**“Worth loving again.”**

 

“...Can you come here and watch this with me…? Can we...just—enjoy each other’s company...just for tonight?” Her quiet voice managed to leave the walls of my heart trembling.  
I looked up at her one last time, biting my lip.  
I had wanted nothing more than to embrace her, wrap her in my arms, revisit our not-so-distant past.  
I wanted to shower her with kisses again. Tickle her mid-makeout just to hear that musical, contagious laugh of hers against my mouth again. Stroke her beautifully soft hair back as she began to fall asleep on top of me again. Memorize the mollifying pattern of her soft breathing again.  
I wanted _us_ again. **  
** I’d wanted us back for quite some time now. And although this may have been just her way of getting her itch for physical contact scratched, I was more than happy to oblige.

 

 **“She is right in front of me...and** ** _my God_** **is she** **beautiful. And** ** _my God_** **am I a love-drunk fool.”** **  
** Line skip. **  
****“** ** _Her_** **love-drunk fool.”**

I left the notebook open on the round table that was next to me so the ink could dry and rose from my spot on the chair.  
“I think I’d like that very much.”  
Laura’s eyes brightened and she hit pause on her laptop before moving it to the side so that she could adjust herself and the handful of covers surrounding her.  
I kicked off my boots and sat the black choker I’d forgotten I was wearing next to the notebook before I walked over to my beautiful lover.  
She had peeled the blankets back a tad for me and I slide myself inside, filling the empty space on the mattress next to her while slowly filling the gap in my heart that time without her had created.

 

After I got situated on the mattress, Laura reached for her laptop to place in front of us, all the while I began to wrap an arm around her head and snake the other one around her hips.    
She backed herself into me so that her head was comfortably nuzzled in between my arm and her entire lower body was curled into my lower body.  
I grinned at the familiar scent—like a warm vanilla candle illuminating a dark, cold room—and the familiar warm temperature and soft skin that I had learned to associate with her.  
I felt...home. Safe.  
Complete.

 

“Can you see?” Laura looked up at me and we caught eyes for a second.  
I nodded and she smiled before nuzzling back into the crook of my arm and hitting the space-bar on her laptop to continue the show.  
Having her wrapped in my arms again felt like a dream, and I didn’t ever want to wake up.

 

***

 

After about an episode and a half of whatever the hell _this_ crap was (if she was going to spend a majority of her time posted in front of a screen, she could have _at least_ picked a more interesting show to indulge in) the cupcake looked up at me.  
“Hey.”  
I returned her gaze and weakly grinned back, “Hey.”

She adjusted once more so that she was no longer resting on my arm, but on one of the pillows from the couch in the other room that she had claimed as “her new yellow pillow”, although it was a dark brown colour and no where near as comfortable.  
Her eyes were bouncing across my face and mine were doing the same to hers, committing the close proximity of our faces to memory.

“Do you miss it? ...How things were before the anglerfish... before fighting your mother? And before the whole Vordenberg thing which...yeah, sorry about that I had absolutely _no_ clue that’s how that story would play itself out...But anyway…. Do you miss how everything was before all of this…catastrophic damage and-and...arguing...B-Before...me?” Her ending words were no louder than a whisper, yet they resonated with a deafening intensity within my ears.  
I positioned myself so that I was on my side, holding myself up with my left forearm as I gently ran my fingertips down her right arm.  
She shivered at the contact.  
“While I _will_ admit that I miss only having to worry about bickering and crazy shenanigans that border the pathological with only _one_ person, I can’t say that I miss anything...before any of that.” I looked up at the door briefly as I spoke, attempting to point out the other individual I had the _great pleasure_ of dealing with.

 

Laura looked confused as her eyes searched mine before wandering down to my lips.  
Just the thought of kissing her again... _God_ it’d been so long.  
To taste her again would essentially be the much-needed drink of water that was imperative to my survival.  
“Do you...miss me?” Her voice sounded as if it had been trapped in her throat for a while.  
I grinned weakly before taking the leap of faith and adjusting myself so that I was completely hovering over her, our faces inches apart.  
Our eyes were desperate against each other’s and I swear to God it was like we were polar opposite ends of magnets because _something_ was drawing me towards her with such an overwhelming intensity.

I moved a strand of her hair out of her face and she exhaled at my touch.  
“The reason I don’t miss my life before you is because I had no purpose then. I could’ve cared less whether I was to live or to die. But now... _even_ now...you’ve given me something to fight for. Something to care for...something to _want_ to live for…”  
I pressed our foreheads together and Laura cupped my face in her hands.  
“You’ve granted me the ability to love again, Laura. Of course I miss you. I miss you with every fiber of my being.”  
She shut her eyes and kept a strong grip on my face as we leaned in for a kiss.  
The second our lips attached, I was overtaken by this overwhelming rush—like electricity was flowing through my veins and recharging the girl I used to be.  
The colour that I didn’t realize had been stripped from my world had began to paint the dull walls around us in vibrant hues.

I rested my body on top of hers and pressed her closer into me with my left hand.  
We were kissing each other so passionately and desperately, as if all this time we had been dying from dehydration and were suddenly now being granted the luxury to drink from a drying pond.  
I didn’t even have to ask to initiate the dancing of our tongues in each other’s mouths because Laura had already willingly allowed the entrance by kissing me with an open mouth.  
She tasted as heavenly as I remembered, except our prolonged “hiatus” had made her taste all the more sweeter.  
This was bliss. I was entirely too intoxicated off of her smell, her taste, her warm hands against my cheek.

 _This_ ... _She..._ was what I was living for.  
The only thing I wanted to live for.  
The only thing that would ever be worth living for.

 

“I can’t...I can’t…” Laura breathed into the kiss, one of her hands finding its way into my hair.  
I kept my eyes shut when she broke the kiss, replaying the scene in my head a few times before I had to face the bitter reality in front of me.  
She silently panted, “I—I need you, Carm….I can’t do this anymore...this...silence a-and anger and...distance. I...I—I need you back... ”  
I had been bracing myself for the worst, so her words had come as a complete surprise. I was taken aback.  
_Laura needed me_ .  
Independent, feisty, DIY go-getter Laura Hollis needed _me_ .  
Her words had caused me to die a third time, but this time I had lucked out and actually gone to heaven.

Happiness had exploded on the inside of me like a plethora of firecrackers on the fourth of July and I couldn’t contain it.  
Tears began to well in my eyes and in order to avoid her witnessing my absolutely _pathetic_ display of emotion, I re-locked our lips.  
I exuded all of me into that kiss, gifting her with anything and everything I had left: my non-beating heart, my gossamery soul, my egregiously maudlin mind, my valor...my everlasting love.  
It wasn’t much, and she sure as hell deserved someone better, someone more benevolent and worthy to be loved by the angel that she was.  
But I was going to make with what little I had to give her the world. I was going to prove that I would one day be worthy of her love because...well...

“I love you—so goddamn much .”

 

The words slipped out, entangled themselves in our lips before forcing themselves into both our ears and down my beautiful sweetheart’s throat.

I hadn’t meant to say it out loud. Not while we were this early into our painstakingly brief recovery process.  
But it was out there now and _Goddammit_ why was I such a sappy blathering idiot?  
We both paused for a second and Laura backed out of the kiss, her eyes slowly opening to look into my very obviously worried ones.  
After a few seconds of silence, I was absolutely certain that I had driven her away and was _just_ about to go off on a quick, hopefully _not_ frantic sounding tangent as to why those words had left my mouth, but my lips were quickly stopped by those quivering pink ones crashing against them.

She roughly cupped my face in her hands, wiping a few of my stray tears as she did so and even adding a couple of her own.  
Our lips were furious against one another and I could have sworn we were both gathering the taste of the perfect mix of vehemence and emotions on each other’s lips to create a lover’s cocktail.  
Laura’s tears turned into silent sobs that echoed into my own mouth. The sound of her crying was enough to dismantle what little composure I had left.  
We were both coming apart within each other’s embrace, but our lips and our love glued our pieces back together so that we would return to each other much stronger than before.  
Preparing us for forever. Because I was never going to leave her again.

 

“Carm...I…” Laura attempted to formulate a sentence, but her sobs would send her back into incoherence.  
But it was alright. I knew what she wanted to say.

Her kiss had said it all: “I love you too.”

 

We continued to lose ourselves within the kiss, feeling time and space reconstruct themselves for us, allowing us all the time we needed to heal our wounded hearts.  
After a few more mind-numbingly blissful seconds, Laura separated our lips.  
I slowly opened my eyes to her puffy ones and couldn’t help but smile.  
_She was mine again._ _  
_ I kissed her eyelids and wiped off the remaining tears that were lingering on her cheeks, causing her to giggle.  
One of her soft hands gently wiped away a few stragglers of my own off of my cheek and tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear.  
We were silent for a moment, taking in the light and beautiful air that had formed around us. Everything wasn’t okay yet, but this was a good beginning, and I was hopeful for the future of this. Of us.

“We essentially just ‘Netflix’ed and chilled’.” she joked suddenly, turning her head towards the still softly murmuring laptop.  
I sniffled and grinned, my eyes never leaving her perfect face.  
“I dunno, cupcake, from what I’ve heard, ‘chilling’ usually comes with a _little_ more ‘Notso PG-13’ displays of affection.”  
Laura laughed that musical laugh that never failed to make the hairs on the back of my neck stand before reaching over to her laptop and hitting the spacebar.  
Her attention quickly reverted back to me as she let a hand softly brush my cheek and trail down to my neck, stopping to play with the knitting of my collar.

Her eyes were focused on her hand as the other hand gently slid up the sleeves of my other arm.  
She bit her lip. “Would it…”  
I rose an eyebrow, silently asking her to finish her thought.  
A small grin slid across her face as she shook her head and continued, “N-never mind.”  
“No come on, what were you gonna say?” I pressed, grinning widely.  
She bit her smiling lip and let a hand trail back up my neck to trace small circles into my cheek with her thumb.

“Would it be too much to ask...if we could finish the _very_ sacred ritual of ‘Netflix and chilling” by enacting the—’Notso PG-13 displays of affection’?” her hands raked themselves into my hair, causing a wave of pleasure to shoot down my spine.  
I was the one biting my smiling lip now.  
Kissing Laura again had woken me up from my melancholic slumber, but having sex with Laura again would resurrect parts of me that had been dead for centuries.  
Just thinking about her with my face between her legs, her hair a disheveled mess, my back covered in scratches, those quivering lips screaming my name loud enough to awaken LaF and whatever ungodly creatures roamed the depths of this library…

 

“Is Miss entirely-too-tightly-wound suggesting that we engage in the ancient tradition of mending relationships through a steamy dose of make up sex?” I rose my eyebrows and rested our foreheads together.  
She was grinning, her gaze flickering between my lips and my eyes.  
“Hey, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with some— _physical reassurance_ .” Laura mused.  
I chuckled briefly before teasing, “Physical reassurance, huh? Well in that case...” I pressed a long peck onto her plump lips before gutturally smirking, “Let me reassure my everlasting bond to you with some _amazing_ , supernaturally exhilarating make up sex, darling.”

 

We locked lips again, this time around our kisses being superbly aggressive and hungry.  
If it was reassurance that she wanted, then it was reassurance she would get.  
I was going to fuck her so well that the extent of my presence would brand itself into the inside of her eyelids, never to be questioned again:

 

Forever.

 

I began to lift her blue and pink spotted blouse over her head and discarded it to the side. Immediately after, Laura lifted my my beige top and tossed it, the shirt landing on top of her laptop.  
She didn’t seem to notice or care though because her lips glued themselves back to my own and her hands quickly fumbled with the clasp of my bra.  
The pace in which we were going was entirely too slow for my liking, so I hastened it up a bit by using my supernatural speed to peel the articles of clothing off of both of our bodies in the literal blink of an eye.  
The blankets once draping around my body had been tossed about in the process.  
Laura was a bit taken aback at the speed and widened her eyes once everything had settled.  
“Whoa. I think you just gave me whiplash.” she joked as she took my face back in her hands.  
I held her bottom lip in-between my teeth, grinning maliciously as I did so before enthusiastically pressing my lips against hers.

 

Our lips continued their fervent dance for a few seconds longer before I disconnected them and smirked in-between breaths, “Now let me give you...something a bit more—pleasant.”  
I began to suck violent kisses down her neck, her collarbone, and then attached myself to her left breast.  
My doe-eyed lover exhaled breathy moans as I flattened my tongue against her nipple, all the while her right hand absentmindedly massaging my shoulder.  
My left hand busied itself by roughly massaging her other breast and I continued to exercise my mouth by licking and sucking roughly at her breast and nipple.

Foreplay was my forté, and I was going to make sure I had her _begging_ me for more.  
The hands at my shoulders inched their way into my hair, raking her fingers against my scalp once more before gripping a good chunk of my hair.  
“C-Carm…” she was mewling softly, lightly...innocently.  
The puny air to her voice definitely should _not_ have turned me on the way it had but there I was, so undeniably turned on that I was certain there wasn’t going to be an ounce of gentle in me tonight.

“Did you miss this? Miss my hands groping you? My lips—leaving bruises in places only we would see? Did you miss the way I made your body _crave_ attention?” I teased, as I switched breasts.  
She exhaled sharply and tossed her head back when I sucked at her other breast.  
“Y-yes…” her voice was breathy and tremulous.  
Laura was beginning to get impatient because she attempted to rub herself against the thigh I was using to keep myself balanced.  
“Na uh, cupcake.” I moved my hand at her breast down to her hips to pin them down, “Good things— _come_ —to those who wait.”  
She whined and I made sure to hold her glare as I kissed my way back to her nipple.

Seeing as I probably only had this brief window of time before my fangs would present themselves, I ran my tongue across her hardened nipple once more before gently biting down on it, my eyes still on her own.  
“F-f—uck…” Laura moaned silently, biting her lip to silence herself.  
I smiled mischievously as I watched desperation slowly forming across her face.  
Her hands raked against my scalp once again but her nails dug into me every time I bit down a bit harder. I moaned against her breast before moving my mouth to lick down her torso, collecting the taste of the salty sweat that was forming on her perfect body.  
“Carm...please...agh—please…” she moaned desperately, her eyes pleading.  
I sat back on my legs to tease her before replying, “Please what, sweetheart? What do you want?”  
My beautiful, aggravated lover sat up and pulled me back down to her by my wrists and slid them down her toned abs.  
“Just— _fuck me_ …please.” she wheezed, her eyes glazed with a thick layer of intense carnal desire.

 

My face was beaming in satisfaction.  
God how I missed her soft skin, the curve of her hips, her beauty marks, the sound of the familiar fast-paced pattern her heart picked up whenever we were making love.  
I missed the way those eyes _ached_ for me.  
But I _especially_ missed her impetuous begging, like the alluring melody of a siren’s song.  
It was great to be back.  
“Say no more, my love.” I cooed absentmindedly before pressing gentle kisses to her waist and sliding my way down to the area she needed me the most.

 

I peppered tender, almost ghost-like kisses to her inner thigh, enjoying the smell of her rather intense arousal.  
“Someone’s excited.” I quipped, appreciating just how wet I had made her.  
Laura sighed an impatient sigh. “Carmilla I swear—”  
But I didn’t let her finish. I quickly brought my lips to her moistened clit and allowed my tongue to lick sharply at it.

          Whatever threat she was attempting to formulate switched it’s course and transformed into a terse inhale.  
She tasted even sweeter than I had remembered—despite the fact that her diet has consisted of popcorn and junk-food (just thinking about that Cheezit Casserole with Beef Jerky Remoulade still makes me shudder from time to time).  
I wanted to commit the beautiful taste of my girlfriend to memory, make her the only substance I craved more than blood.  
Which, speaking of, I _was_ still severely low in. And it may not have been the right scene to ask her if I could drink from her.  
Alluring, but probably not appropriate.

 

My tongue flattened against her length and I looked up at my squirming, glowing girl, falling in love with her all over again.  
One of her hands clasped around her breast and the other snaked it’s way back into my hair to bring my face closer into her as if it were actually possible for me to get any closer.  
“Ahg—Car-Carm…” her pitch had gone up an octave, but she still managed to keep herself fairly quiet.  
I allowed myself to spend a bit more time pleasing her with my tongue before I licked my way up her body to reconnect our lips.  
Our tongues met, allowing Laura to taste the intoxicating mixture of both herself and I while her hot hands searched my cool body, making every inch of my skin cry out for her.  
My breasts were roughly cuffed in her hands and I released a throaty moan into my beauty’s mouth.

The extent of my arousal, plus my enraged inner bloodlust was driving me _mad_ .  
I needed to fuck her like _now_.

I used the hand that wasn’t cupping her face to rapidly rub against her dripping folds, which had rewarded me high-pitched moans from my extremely turned on lover.  
I tried to drown out her moans with opened mouthed kisses, praying to whatever higher power that her outbursts wouldn’t wake the LaFoMorph up.   
She bit my bottom lip and brought both of her arms behind my neck, bracing for what I was going to do next.  
Whatever gentle disposition that I had left immediately dissipated once Laura began to slide wet kisses across my jaw and down to my neck.  
My animalistic nature overtook me, and the only thing I wanted to do was tear Laura apart.

 

“Ohmy—God.” her breathy moan resonated off the walls of my ears as I shoved two fingers into her without any type of warning.  
I was giving at it, roughly plowing my fingers into her and causing her legs to lift into the air and shake.  
“F-fuck...ha—harder Carm…” she moaned against my neck, her hot breath sending warm chills down my back.  
I obeyed and added a third finger before quickly and robustly slamming my fingers into her.  
Her breathy moans had shifted to frequent, piercing shrieks of pleasure that seemed to heighten my already significantly heightened arousal.  
All of a sudden a sharp pain ran up my neck and I let out a low moan in response. Laura was biting my neck, attempting to muffle the sound of her stimulating moans into my flesh.  
Various grunts and groans escaped her lips and flooded the room as I continued the violent pounding of my fingers into her.

My fingers curled inside of her suddenly, causing her to toss her head back (which caused a serious jolt of pain to arise in the part of my neck that her teeth were still clamped to) and her nails to puncture the skin on my back.  
I couldn’t stop the rather loud moan that escaped my own lips upon feeling the sharp pain of her hands raking down my back.  
“OhmyGod—Oh f-fuck Carm...fuck!” her moans were getting louder and although any other time I wouldn’t have minded if she moaned so loud that she awoke the ghosts of Christmas past, present, and future, I didn’t want Einstein in the other room to barge in here and torch us to death for awaking them after a disappointing day (they’ve had quite a few of those after discovering that Maman had taken control of Perry).

 

“Not so loud, sun dance.” I growled against her collarbone.  
Laura was squirming and shaking with every violent thrust of my hand, causing the nails in my back to claw their way across my entire back.  
I definitely didn’t think me a masochist, but the stinging sensation coupled with my intense craving for blood seemed to enrage my arousal.  
My fangs had released themselves, and it took everything in me not to bite down on my lover’s flexed throat.  
In one quick movement, I stopped ramming into her and used the hand instead to quickly palm her clit while taking her right nipple into my other hand and pinching it.

 

            And I thought her moans were loud before. Her body was trembling under my weight and her moans were now deafening shrills.  
At this rate I was certain _Maman_ would have been able to hear her.  
I quickly clapped my hand over her mouth and her eyes widened in surprise.  
“You’re going to get us in trouble, sweetheart.” I didn’t even recognize my own voice when I spoke. It was so incredibly low, oozing with pure, carnal desire and lust.  
I needed to create some friction of my own soon or the pressure welling in the pit of my stomach was going to start hurting me a lot more than I’d be able to handle.

I relaxed my movements and slowly removed my hand from over her mouth so that I could position my _ridiculously_ damp folds against her own.  
Her heartbeat was pounding in my ears and the blood that was filling her cheeks and forming bruises around her breasts and neck was calling out to me.  
I shut my eyes and bit my lip giving myself a minute to calm myself down so that I wouldn’t go full-on animal and bite into her.  
“Y-you're...hungry—aren’t you?” Laura panted.  
I shook my head and nearly growled, “I’m fine.”  
Before she could respond, I roughly ground myself into her, causing ripples of pleasure to run up my back.  
“Ca—arm!” she yelped.

I used one of my arms to hold me up against the mattress and the other to bring her hips into me.  
“Ooh my— _Godd_ I’mgunna...I _can’t_ —” her hands were choking the blankets under us and her outcries were getting more high-pitched.  
I rolled my body against her at a faster pace now, my own body beginning to quaver from the amount of pleasure running through it.  
My hand snaked up to her throat and I positioned my thumb on one of her carotid arteries and my fingers on her other one, but I didn’t squeeze.  
We locked eyes, hers desperate and mine on fire, wordlessly asking her if this was okay.  
She bit her lip in another attempt to silence her loud whimpers and nodded her head quickly.

With consent given, I placed an even amount of pressure around her neck.  
Her moans became more breathy, but were still fairly audible nonetheless.  
Laura’s eyes were beginning to roll into the back of her head and her lower body was beginning to jerk away from my own, signifying that she was getting close.  
I exerted what energy I had left to grind against her at my fastest pace, and she twisted her face into the sheets.  
“Yesyesyes! Carm!” her words were clinging together and her breaths were becoming more and more choppy.  
I was moaning significantly louder myself the closer I was coming to climax.

The vein at her neck was visible due to the strain, and it was a bit more inviting then I would have liked it to be.  
_I’m not going to bite her. I’m not going to bite her. Mircalla you’re not going to bite her…_ _  
  
_

“Do it! Carm— _ahh_ ...I know you’re hungry...Carm—bite me….please….” her gaze found mine (I’m guessing she could see my indecision)  as she was pleading up to me.  
I didn’t like biting Laura. Although my little creampuff’s biting kink had made itself present early on ( _that_ was certainly a fun discovery), I was always so afraid to drink from her. Afraid that once my lips interacted with the sweet Ambrosia that _was_ her delicious blood, they wouldn’t stop.  
And I’ve had centuries of practice biting folks and then letting them go, but in all of my years alive I had never found anyone that tasted even remotely as heavenly as Laura did.  
“I love you...I loveyou iloveyou Carm I—” she cried desperately, her eyes beginning to roll into the back of her head again.

My stomach felt as if a million butterflies had just been released inside of it, the dark room brightened, and the lust induced high that I was in had been boosted.  
I knew she loved me...I knew it and I have always known it.  
But to finally hear her say the words years later, after all the bickering and arguing and the breaking up, serving as a reminder that _we made it back together_ …  
Saying I had transcended didn’t describe my current state enough.

I was in absolute fucking bliss.

I removed my hand from around her neck and placed it over her mouth, knowing good and well that if I timed my bite correctly, she would be _screaming_ .  
My hips gave one last aggressive tug before I felt myself ready to tumble over the edge.  
Her hands returned to their bracing position at my neck, and tightened as her body began to shake just as violently as mine was.  
She was screaming my name from behind my hand, and I knew she was just about to lose it. So I licked at the still visible vein on her neck and took a deep breath (that came out more as a moan) as I slowly sunk my teeth into her.

That all-too-familiar taste of her sublime blood flooded into my mouth, burning my throat as I ingested it.  
I was correct at assuming her climaxing moan would be the loudest, because I heard my name behind my hand almost as clear as day.  
Laura hit her climax and was emptying herself onto me, warm moisture coating over my lower body while her nails dug into the back of my neck.  
Being here with Laura’s blood coursing through my undead body, her coming apart under me, drowning in her embrace and her love was one of the memories I would always hold closest to my heart.  
The night Laura Hollis, the _feisty_ little love of my life had allowed me to come back into her, give myself to her again...had allowed herself to come back to me.  
The night Laura Hollis had finally branded me with the words she never wanted me to forget:  
“I love you.”

  
“Laur—a…” I moaned against her neck as I began to tremble on top of her.  
Her blood had heightened all of my senses, converting me _not_ back into the girl that I used to be, but someone different...stronger...someone better.

 

I detached myself from her neck—although it took all of me to do so—and removed my hand from around her mouth as I came on top of her.  
Her breathing was ragged, her eyes were drooping, and the tight hold that she had on the back of my neck had dropped down to my shoulders.  
I licked at her wounds in an attempt to somewhat assuage the pain I know she was experiencing from them before kissing up her neck and to her lips.  
We kissed softly, gently, with so much passion that even Shakespeare wouldn’t have been able to illustrate it.  
But our love was not meant for literature, nor for the public’s eye.  
Our love was our own. And no matter how dysfunctional, uncontrollable, or painful it could get, I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

I broke the kiss for a minute, but Laura followed my lips with her own, her eyelids still fluttering.  
I smiled into the kiss before I broke it once again to relax her head against the pillow under her.  
“How are you feeling, my love?” my voice had finally reverted back to it’s normal tone.  
Her eyes were still closed but her breathing had finally picked up a normal pattern.  
She reached out a weak arm to me and brought me close to her as she softly responded, “Tired.”  
I giggled and reached for the blankets that were now at the very edge of the mattress and wrapped ourselves in them and wrapped myself around her, allowing her to rest her head on my chest.

           I lost count of how many kisses I pressed to the top of her head, but she didn’t complain tonight. In fact, she curled into me, welcoming my “possessive, romantic vampire crap” just this once.  
Holding Laura in this soft nature, completely contrasting the rough, graphic acts that we had just committed, made me come to a realization.

No, I wasn’t a Jane Austen, or a Shakespeare, or a Rembrandt, or a Picasso.  
No, I would never acquire their level of skill at embodying love and art and emotion and passion into the pages of a notebook, or from a brush to a canvas.  
I would never have all the right words to say, and I would most certainly never be perfect.  
But that didn’t mean I couldn’t be an artisan.

            I was an artist.  
My love was the brush, and Laura’s flawed but perfect body was the canvas.  
I was a writer.  
My corny one-liners and dreamy promises were the words, and Laura’s beautiful heart that never stopped trying and loving were the pages.

Her love was my turning page and I was her exhibitionist; the creature who would honor her image...present and augment her inner and outer beauty.  
Make her a better person.

           But she didn’t need me to do that.

She never would.  
She was the type of girl that didn’t need help growing.  
And I loved that about her. Because she was mine without being mine; she would never belong to anyone but herself.  
But she gifted me with the privilege of being apart of her life to inhibit growth in not just herself, but in the lives that she touched around her.  
  


           I loved her.  
And I always would.

“Sleep well, creampuff.” I whispered, sensing the change in her breathing pattern signifying that she was almost asleep.  
A weak hand reached down to my idle one that was at  her waist and interlocked our fingers.

 

“Goodnight, Carmilla.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;-; I miss Hollstein so much  
> I can't wait for s3!
> 
> I have had a terrible case of writer's block & so a lot of the things I've been writing have been coming out kinda shitty so I'm not really sure when I'll be writing next. I hope you guys enjoyed this though (this shit was 16 fucking pages shoot me)


	9. Pure Reasoning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura's bored and Carmilla won't give her the attention she needs.  
> How do you get back at your girlfriend that refuses to give you attention?  
> You give her a taste of her own medicine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this literally out of nowhere because I was inspired by [Laberintodeofelia's art](http://laberintodeofelia.tumblr.com/post/155476740823/cheek-pinching-is-underrated-and-laura-couldnt) so like thank you so much :p also her drawings are really fucking rad and smutty so you should follow her/check her shit out ! :)
> 
> Like literally it's about 5 am and i hate myself for this lol
> 
> i'm not going to do a music list because i'm tired lol but just listen to some sex songs you'll be good

        “I’m so friggin’ bored!”

        Laura’s exasperated shout rang in the vampires ears, catching her completely off guard from behind her book.  
It was a warm Friday afternoon at Silas and the two girls were spending their pleasant afternoon indoors.   
Carmilla didn’t necessarily enjoy being out in the sun for extended periods of time, which is the reason they both were cooped up in their warm room.   
Laura had tried bothering LaFontaine and Perry, but they had both gone to some type of eye appointment on Laf’s behalf.   
”We’re looking at options for a replacement. I’m going to continue to insist that they insert their trial model of a cyborg eye and I’m not leaving until I get one!” LaF had raged.   
“Yeah...and I’m going to make sure they _don't_ end up like the governator.” Perry stated.  
The little creampuff was upset, but she understood.

        She was hoping, however, that her girlfriend would be in the mood to go shopping, or sight-seeing, or to take a walk or...literally just anything.  
Carmilla had promised that once she finished her book she would go with Laura to wherever she wanted.   
Except she said that about an hour ago and from the looks of it she didn’t think she’d be finishing her book anytime soon.   
The younger girl looked over at her girlfriend from her bed.  
Carmilla was in black thigh highs, an oversized burgundy and black baseball-T and underwear, lounging on her bed as she read, completely paying Laura no mind.   
Laura sauntered over to her girlfriend’s bed and plopped down next to her, burying her face in her yellow pillow.   
The vampire moved over a bit on the bed for Laura but other than that she remained unmoved.

        The smaller girl began to whine into the pillow, hoping it’d grab the attention of the entirely too focused bookworm next to her.  
Carmilla, knowing that her girlfriend just wanted some type of attention, began to run her hands through her hair.  
“Almost done, cupcake.” she absentmindedly responded.  
Laura twisted her head into her girlfriend’s thigh highs and grumbled, “You said that thirty minutes ago.”  
The darker haired girl’s eyes never left her book as she lightly dragged her fingers down the other girl’s cheek.  
“And now I’m saying it thirty minutes later. Funny how that works.” she chimed sarcastically.

        Laura rolled her eyes and stretched a hand across her lover’s lap, defeated.  
She knew Carmilla was more than likely taking her time reading the book and that she’d probably _die_ from boredom if she couldn’t come up with a way to grab her attention.  
The cool hand grazing her cheeks ceased its movement for a minute to cup her face instead, her thumb gently making a downward stroke at her cheek and chin.  
Her girlfriend's contrasting cold hands felt nice against her warm cheeks, like a gentle breeze.  
She pressed her face into the vampire’s thigh, enjoying not only the varying temperature but also it’s smooth texture and the alluring smell that came off her girlfriend at all times.

        An overwhelming desire to drown in her girlfriend overtook her and she began to gently trail kisses up her right thigh, using her other hand to rub her left inner thigh.  
“Mmm…tempting…” Carmilla shivered under her girlfriend's hand but used one of her hands to interlock fingers with the hand at her inner thigh, “But not going to work.”  
Laura huffed, “Oh come on.”  
She angled herself around the book in her hand and placed her head in the crook of her pale neck.  
“The book can’t be _that_ good.” Laura complained, bringing her hand up to cup her girlfriend’s cheek.  
Carmilla looked down at her girlfriend and rose an eyebrow, “Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason? Oh yeah it is.”  


        The smaller girl pouted and wrapped her arms and legs around the darker haired girl, “Kant can wait.”  
Carmilla slid her hand to the back of her girlfriend’s head and massaged it, pressed a quick kiss to her lips, and went right back to what she was doing.   
“Okay, after _this_ chapter. I promise.”   
Laura groaned in defeat.   
Except she wasn't going to accept defeat.   
She decided to make a sort of game out of distracting her girlfriend.

        Laura unlatched from her girlfriend, but began to kiss at her neck.  
First they were light pecks, but when her girlfriend made no movement, they changed into more aggressive, sucking kisses.  
She didn’t give the vampire any time to swat her away for she quickly began to suck kisses down her neck, lifting her shirt at the bottom and continuing on the exposed pale skin.  
The closer and closer Laura got to her waist the more Carmilla squirmed, a sign that she was getting to her.  
The cupcake decided she’d tease her a bit and slowly trailed her hand down her panties, making sure to add a bit of pressure at her fingertips when she passed her clit.

“ _Jesus_ , Laura.” Carmilla inhaled, her waist twitching slightly.  
Laura grinned.  
Got her.

  
        She placed herself at her girlfriend’s legs and slowly slid her hands into the edges of her panties before slowly inching them off, making eye contact with the vampire as she did so.   
Once her panties were off, Laura crawled back up to her now totally _not_ distracted girlfriend.   
“Oh, you want to pay attention to me _now_ ?” she straddled her waist and folded her fingers behind the pale girl’s neck.   
“Well with you touching me like that, I don’t think I have any other option.” Carmilla sarcastically mused, dropping the book onto the bed and placing her hands at her girlfriend’s waist.  
Laura brought their lips together in a hungry kiss, biting on her bottom lip every-so-often.   
“Huh…” Laura separated the kiss and breathed before gently pushing her girlfriend back so she’d lie on the bed.   
“Well since you didn’t seem to _want_ to touch me…” The cupcake got off of her and dug around under Carmilla’s bed until she came back up with bondage rope in hand, “You don’t _get_ to touch me.”

        Carmilla went to interject, but the thought of Laura dominating her didn’t sound all too bad at the moment.  
The vampire allowed her girlfriend to tightly bound her wrists together, all the while eyeing her lasciviously.  
“Keep your arms above your head.” Laura demanded as she began to remove her own clothing from her body.  
“Whatever you say, cupcake.” she teased.  
She ignored the condescending tone to her voice as she tossed her clothes off of the bed and went back to leaving marks down her stomach.

        When her mouth got fairly close to the area she was wanted most, she diverted her attention to her inner thighs, sucking and gently nipping her occasionally.  
“God...such a tease, sweetheart.” the raven haired girl whined in a deep voice.   
Laura lifted her head. “Keep talking and I’ll stop.”   
Carmilla bit her lip instantly.   
Her action pleased the lighter haired girl and she smiled slightly before bringing her face back to her thighs.   
Laura began to press gentle kisses mere inches from the vampire’s folds, causing her to squirm impatiently.   


        “For someone who was paying me no mind whatsoever, you seem to be _pretty_ significantly wet.”   
Laura slid a finger slowly across her folds, causing the vampire to exhale sharply.   
She placed her wet finger in her mouth, relishing the taste of her girlfriend as she watched with a gaping mouth.   
Carmilla was shifting about, her patience thinning by the second.   
But Laura was feeling a bit sadistic today.

        “You know what…” she adjusted herself so her feet were at Carmilla’s, “Since you had me wait, I’m going to do the same to you.”  
Laura began to grope herself, her hands wandering her own body until she snaked one down to her clit.  
“Move and you won’t be allowed to touch me for a week.” She warned, seeing her girlfriend beginning to tug under the rope.  
Carmilla groaned loudly, “You’re killing me, Hollis.”  
Laura grinned, but her grin fell and turned into a breathy sigh as she began to rub her fingers down her length.  
She hadn’t even realized the extent of her own arousal until she did so.

        Quiet moans began to emerge from her mouth as she continued to rub herself, her other hand playing in her hair.  
“Mmm...I wish it was you making me feel like this…” she moaned, her eyes closed.  
She began to imagine that her girlfriend was the one rubbing her, groping her breasts and neck, snaking her hand into her hair; it got her going a lot faster.   
She slowly slipped a finger inside of herself, another quiet moan releasing itself as she did so.  
Carmilla was watching ardently, her fists tightening above her head to resist the urge to rip out of the rope and take her girlfriend right then and there.  


        “Carm...right there…” Laura was moaning, one of her legs stretched and the other bent at her knee.  
She started to roll her body into her hand, inserting a second finger as she did so.   
With her other hand she grabbed at her breast, imagining Carmilla taking her breast into her mouth as she did so.   
Carmilla’s breathing picked up speed and it was getting harder to just sit still and wait.   
Laura opened her eyes to see the damage she was doing to her vampiric lover.   
She had sweat at her brow, her hands had a death grip on the backboard behind her, she was certain she was going to bite through her bottom lip, and her eyes looked upon her desperately, drenched with intense desire.   
Her girlfriend’s display of restraint and desperation was turning her on a lot more than she’d liked it to.

        “T-tell me...tell me what you want to do to me...tell me Carm…” Laura breathed, her rubs picking up a more aggressive pattern.  
Carmilla let out a shaky breath.   
“I want—I want to spread that pretty pussy open for me…” her voice came out sounding strained.  
“I want to...pin you to the bed...and shove my fingers into that tight little hole of yours.”   
As Carmilla stated this, Laura inserted two of her fingers into herself, her legs squirming as she did so.  
“Fuck…” Laura moaned and tightened her grip on her hair.  
“I’d rub circles on your clit—as I plowed you with my fingers...your cute little body squirming to get away from your orgasm...but I wouldn’t let you. I’d make you take my fingers…” Carmilla was visualizing her words as she watched her girlfriend masterbate to them.  


        “Goddamn baby, you’re so hot.” Carmilla moaned, her lower body thrusting into the air.  
Laura picked up speed suddenly, causing her toes to begin to curl.   
“Shit...Carm keep going don’t stop don’t stop.” Laura shrilled, her words bleeding together.   
“God, I’d—I’d take out the strap-on because I know you _love_ it...you love how many times I can make you cum when I fuck you with it.” Carmilla hoarsely explained, her lower body still thrusting.   
And she was right, whenever Carmilla busted out the strap-on, Laura turned into some type of sexual fiend. She loved the way her lover dominated her whenever she used it, the way she was always so rough with her whenever she had it. She _craved_ it.   
Laura’s moans were getting closer together and her body was rising and falling and twitching more frequently.   
“Oh God, when I get out of this rope I’m going to plow that toy into you until you’re nothing but a quivering, shrilling mess. I’m going to make sure the neighbours know I’m _destroying_ my little cupcake from the inside out.” Carmilla began to squirm more frequently as well.

        Laura went even faster at her words, her legs flailing about, her hand grasping her breast, and her toes curling.  
“Yeah yeah yeah, fuck, Carm, fuck!” Laura’s moans were turning into desperate shrills.  
The overbearing need for her girlfriend got the best of her and she quickly pulled her girlfriend closer to her by her leg and positioned herself on top of her face.  
To her delight, Carmilla wasn’t in a teasing mood and went to work with her tongue in her lover’s folds.  
She inhaled sharply, one of her hands clasping onto her breast yet again while the other was rubbing against her clit.  
“Carm!” Laura breathily exclaimed, shutting her eyes so tightly she was beginning to see white.  
The vampire could sense her girlfriend’s walls were beginning to tighten and roughly sucked at her, enjoying the taste.

        One last loud, long moan escaped Laura’s lips before she came.  
She came hard, her entire lower body vibrating furiously on top of the vampiric beauty under her.   
Laura tightened her grip on the sheets, hoping to keep a grip on reality as she transcended into another universe under the magical power of her girlfriend’s mouth.   
“CarmCarmCarm…” Laura shrilled as she began to come down.   
Despite the fact that she knew her girlfriend’s orgasm was subsiding, Carmilla kept up her rough sucking and sharp licks.   
“Wait—fuck! Carm...stop…” she was too sensitive for it, her hips twitching away from her girlfriend.   
Carmilla growled but obeyed her love’s plea and rested her head back onto the bed.

        Laura was breathing heavily, her legs were tingling, and her eyes were trying to adjust to the room around her.  
When she regained control of her body, she slumped on the bed next to her girlfriend, panting heavily.  
“See, the thing about ‘punishing’ me is, you can’t give me what I want.” Carmilla mocked.  
The lighter haired girl looked over at her, attempting to even-out her breathing.  
“Jesus, you were trying to kill me.” Laura chuckled after a second.  
A smug smile fell upon Carmilla’s lips, “You should know I play dirty.”  
Laura laughed and sat back up.  
“ _We’re_ not done yet.” she grinned matter-of-factly before placing a gentle kiss upon her lips.

        Carmilla was _hungry,_ turning Laura’s soft kiss into something barbaric and needy.   
The younger girl broke the kiss and ran her hands down the older girl’s body.   
She squirmed under the warmth of her girlfriend’s fingers and watched with a smile on her face as Laura kissed her way down her stomach to her waist.   


        Laura took a minute to admire her perfectly chiseled pale body and her lover’s gorgeous face.  
Some days she had to just step back and appreciate the true beauty that was Carmilla Karnstein.   
To this day Laura still didn’t understand how _she_ of all people ended up with someone like _her._   
And not only did she ‘end up with her’, but Carmilla was incredulously in _love_ with her.   
It brought her so much joy knowing that she had all of Carmilla and that she had eyes for no one else. She didn’t think she deserved it. Love. Especially unconditional love.   
But Carmilla was always there to drown her in it; she was always there to remind her that she was always going to love her, no matter if she felt she deserved it or not.   
“Oh Carm…” Laura started, her stomach filling with butterflies from just looking at her.

God, she loved her so much.

 

        Carmilla watched her, her eyes daubed with desire, as she began to inch towards her.  
There was a cute sort of dazed smile stuck to her lips, and Laura wanted nothing more than to shower her lover in a plethora of kisses and hugs.   
Granted, it _probably_ wasn’t the right time, but the feeling was so strong she didn’t think she’d be able to fight it.   
Carmilla bit her lip as her girlfriend inched towards her, her slow movements coming across as entirely too sexy.   
“I could just…” Laura placed her hands around her tied lover’s face,”...eat you up!”

        Suddenly the vampire was being buried in a surplus of gentle kisses all over her face as Laura wrapped her in her arms.  
“Lawraaa...s-stop!” Carmilla was trying to avoid her lover’s totally PG-13 display of affection. She was far too horny for it.   
But Laura didn’t stop, she continued to plant kisses all over her neck, her cheek, her nose, her lips.   
Laura couldn’t resist the desire to pinch her vampire’s cheeks, so she didn’t.   
“I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.” She kept repeating as she hugged her girlfriend tighter into her.   
After continuously trying to fight it, the vampire gave up her resisting and allowed her lover to continue her excessive kisses.   
“Ugh. I love you too, cupcake...but what the fuck.” she sighed

        Laura giggled against her cold skin and locked their lips together.  
She kissed her girlfriend slowly, passionately. She wanted to express her undying love for her in the kiss, she wanted Carmilla to know that these lips were and would forever be hers.   
Carmilla got the message, because she kissed her back with equally as much passion and love and care.   
Despite the fact that she _totally_ blue-balled her, she still loved her with her entire fucking being.   
The couple smiled into the kiss, falling more and more in love with each other with every passing minute.   


        And just like before, Laura switched the dynamic again by pinching her lover’s cheeks.  
“You’re such a softie, I love you.” she beamed, placing more kisses across her face.   
Carmilla attempted to dodge her kisses again, “Okay, okay, okay!”   
Laura laughed and rolled off of her girlfriend, curling up under her purple sheets.   
Carmilla, sensing that she definitely was _not_ about to get finished off, rolled on top of her blanketed lover.   
“I can’t believe you totally ruined the mood.” Carmilla whined as she broke apart the restraints at her wrists with ease.   
Laura poked her tongue out at her and Carmilla buried her face in her neck, pressing rough kisses to it after doing so.   
“I’m sleep.” Laura yawned, fatigue slowly settling into her bones.   


The vampire rose an eyebrow.  
“So...you’re just going to get me all hot and bothered and then not finish me off?” she complained.   
Laura pressed a kiss to the love of her life’s cold forehead before shutting her eyes and yawning.   
“Yeah...I will. _After_ you finish Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason.”   
Carmilla frowned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :3
> 
> classes start up again on monday & i have 4 classes, a job, an internship, and a club to head sooo I might go MIA for awhile.  
> I'll try to work on [Someone That Loves You](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9164878/chapters/20809159) as frequently as i can but like rn everything is up in the air.
> 
> Hope u enjoyed this & i hope you guys have a great week[end]


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